What am I doing on my last morning off before being back at work? Watching A Very Jonas Christmas Movie. 😶

Fucking Camp London + I Don’t Know; Shitty Pizza Disco Sounds legit.

So I guess today wasn’t ALL bad.

What did Duo Lingo just call me? 👀

Ace of Base. Beck. Alanis. Spice Girls (as a group and MOST solo offerings). And… and yes I mean this sincerely… Kula Shaker. Are. All. Good. Albums. Q can munch my gooch.

TILDA SWINTON IS SIXTY FUCKING FIVE?! Whatever she’s doing - sign me up.

One of my cats is obsessed with stealing (and subsequently destroying) washing-up sponges. Why is she like this? Did I raise her wrong?

When they kill Billy in #CoronationStreet can they please elevate Raphael to a tier-one character please?

#OnThisDay 2 December 1990 Immediately following the first fully-networked repeat of episode one of #CoronationStreet, we're treated to this little montage.

Does anybody else sort their secret Santa the same day they pull names and then wrap it and have it in their locker/desk ready to go 3 weeks in advance? Just me? WHY AM I LIKE THIS?!

Yes I have now watched both Lacey Chabert “Haul Out The Holly” Christmas movies. But do you what’s even worse? I made @jmonkeycrisp.bsky.social watch them too. 😐

Nigella is one of my Patron Saints of Christmas. Between (mainly) her and (a smidge of) The Hairy Bikers, I’m all taken care of for inspiration.

Reading a choose-your-own-adventure Coronation Street book now (a change of pace) and my choices have taken me to Percy Sugden, Maud Grimes and Phyllis Pearce! So camp. I love it.

Finally got round to finishing the Orton diaries. The last 100 pages or so mainly a cataloguing of his sexual adventures with “young boys” and him being proud of it, and it being seen as… somehow acceptable within his social circle? He wrote some ok plays but that’s it, I’m afraid.

Not a surprise. But still an insult. I will cheer when that man, and all those who’ve supported him, get their comeuppance.

The government handed an NHS data contract to Palantir – a spy-tech firm with links to war crimes and deportations. We’re demanding that the NHS stops using Palantir’s toxic tech. Find out if your local NHS Trust is using the software and say no to Palantir 👇 https://goodlaw.social/658abc

First of December… how many “We always said Faggot when I was younger and you can’t stop me!” Fairytale of NewYork articles have we had so far?

Remembering the people we lost - not just as friends and family - but as a culture. Each life lost was a theft of joy, love and potential.

This does not look like the comfiest way to lay… but he’s happy. 🤷‍♂️

Robin are Steve are by far and away the best things about #StrangerThings. They deserve a spin-off. And it’s should be a monster-of-the-week kinda thing crossed with a queer buddy sitcom.

That canceled TV show you’ll never stop thinking about.

5 articles in 2 days… are the BBC trying to tell us something? Are they gonna bring back Blind Date?

My sister’s current foster, Bindy - a beautiful 11-yr-old chihuahua, is looking for a forever home. Fancy a sweet little toothless old lady as company? www.instagram.com/p/DRrkIhbl_7...

I’ve been “terminally online” since 2003. But never, like, in the cool way.

Labour should rename to “Elite B”. The Tories can be “Elite A”. And they can be honest about whose interests they represent. Viva la revolution.

Decorating for Christmas usually makes me really happy. But this time I just feel like everything’s wrong and I’ve made things worse. Ho fucking ho.

Watching Stranger Things series 5… Reeeeeally struggling to remember what happened in series 4.

Watching #ACinderellaChristmasBall and the character that Winnie Cooper from The Wonder Years is playing is meant to have been born in 1988 and I involuntarily “BITCH PLEASE!” ‘ed at the TV.

Manwife’s back went out getting my heels out of the loft so I’ve been left to put as much of the Christmas decorations up by myself as I can. Just the grand tinselling and the ceiling danglies to go…

#911Nashville these two give big Himbo Dick Grayson and Bratty Tim Drake Energy. But, like, straight?

You do not understand how much of my personality is based on having a SHIT birthday. The sad childhood. The friendlessness. The lack of parental effort. The life of lowered expectations. The resentment!

Watching #AHouseOfDynamite because I am very butch and grown up actually.

If us 90s gays had had OUR way…

Chicken wings and Prosecco while I’m watching Corrie because I am a fucking PIMP.

Watching #CoronationStreet and I want to say “Todd would see what’s happening” “He’d get himself out of this situation” “He’s a smart, confident man - he knows better”. 🧵

One thing I learned from Faith on Buffy, albeit in a more socially-acceptable way: 👀 See. 😛 Want. 💰 Take.

Watching a Netflix Christmas movie with a bottle of Prosecco and a bag of Tangfastic. I hereby declare today, the 28th of November; DECEMBER.

In early Christian times there were no fish fingers. FISH FINGERS ARE UNCHRISTIAN. Honestly; bad even for a Tory.

Did they say the word “clock-tick” in the first part of the Wicked movies? BECAUSE THEY SURE AS FUCK SAID IT EVERY TWO MINUTES IN THE SECOND PART.

Black Friday purchases: Yankee Candles, Wine and a little hoover for dusting knick-knacks. I’m so old.

I am SO GAY that last night I kept having prison sex dreams staring the cast of Boots. Honestly? Would recommend.

Tom Grennan? Head ❎ Arms ✅ Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. I am the be-all and end-all of opinions on men well out of my league.

You just don’t see choc ices anymore these days, do you?

Just read volume 1 of #TheNiceHouseByTheSea and… is it perfect? I think it’s fucking perfect. How it builds… how it twists… Tynion and Martinez Bueno and building an incredible world. And that bitch still keeps producing on the Slaughterverse too? That much talent almost makes me angry. 10/10.

Taxing people who earn more to give people who need it more benefits? Yes, and? I’m not mad at it. This IS meant to be a Labour government. I just wish they’d tax the super-rich more, in line with what the Greens are suggesting.

Rumours suggest he’s at it again… #gay

Craving a posh scotch egg. God, I’m a cunt.

Politician who fanned anti-LGBT sentiment stunned to find rising levels of anti-LGBT sentiment

Claudia Winkleman already did. Sorry.

Not mine. But one empathises.