the three genders

top tier bonding experience: going to an antique shop and asking each other “do you need this?” about insane stuff

oh hell yeah

family is at a table next to us. they order crab rangoons. dad keeps saying stuff like “time to goon” “gottah get my goon on” “want me to goon you?” and “dont bother me while im gooning” and im gonna lose it

grief is weird and dumb because what do you mean im having a great day after nearly a week of great days on vacation but now i need to sit and cry about the son i lost before i even got to meet him

my unbelievably peak activities of the day: taking my adderrall with a red bull and then immediately taking a nap

ben: oh look, they gave us a little arugula. as a treat. me: what are you, a horse? ben: the evidence is mounting…

attention: mushrooms that is all

brb eating so many blueberries i become violet beauregarde

i once survived concurrent norovirus and e coli infections i survived salmonella cyclospora aint got nothing on me this ass is built different

feeding goats is my happy place feeding BABY goats is my nirvana

saw lots of mall ninja shit today in portsmouth

animals i got bit by today: -nigerian dwarf goat -budgie -fallow deer -boer goat …but the day is still young

hes a lego corn star

a guy travels to a new place and gets involved in local drama

hand dryers are TOO LOUD bathrooms are acoustic hell holes to begin with, and you want to put a LOUD NOISE MACHINE in there???

i stopped by the hardware store wearing my “these titties nonbinary too” shirt. the guy who works there saw it and asked “why you gottah always come in here with stuff like that?” (same guy who saw my “hot girls have IBS” keychain and gave me his condolences, btw)

a bountiful harvest

this is both me and my dog

if you honk at me while i am crossing the street, i will simply walk slower

my psychiatrist: are you at risk of self harm during your hormonal lows? me: no, not unless vague posting emo statuses counts my psychiatrist: the jury is still out on that one, i’m afraid

we put the hamster tank up off the floor. this has not stopped seph’s attempts to climb inside to hang out with the boys.

i am so confused one of my gym friends blocked me on IG but still waves to me at the gym???

guys i think this female northern cardinal can levitate seeds with her mind

i told someone their dog was a cute lil wookie and they let me HOLD HIM its not even 8:30am and my day has been made

i just witnessed a squirrel frighten a pigeon that is all

POV: you have a food and Seph does not have a food

my army grows in ranks, soon we shall flutter upon our enemies

there is a lightening bug. in my home. crashing into the wall above my computer.

the daily mail posting articles directly to the tatlor swift snark subreddit wasn’t on my 2026 bingo card, but at this point neither was anything else that has happened this year

ABAB: assigned baby at birth

hi god and jesus, its me, long time no talk! so uh, this storm that just rolled in? the one that knocked our power out here in jersey city? well… i will renounce my homosexuality if you make the storm knock out the power to madison square gardens. hugs and kisses, rowan

why im excited for the world cup to end: the meadowlands flea market will be back!!!

oh my god seph managed to knock a fly trap off the fence and got covered in rotting fly juice. she smelled so bad it WOKE ME UP.

new catholic schism is right next to msg wedding on 4th of july weekend on my 2026 bingo card

Ok, yes, Europeans are dumb for hating air conditioning, but everyone should get to share in the fruits of technology’s bounties. Let’s do a good old fashioned Sid Meier’s Civ tech exchange where we give them AC and they teach us how to do a riot where a rich guy gets his ass strung up from a pole

my tricep has been twitching for like 4 hours

haaland plays futbol like its football

who wants to guess why my dog urgently got me and required my attention tonight

does god know you’re talking about your balls on the internet?

on the last day of pride, we remember the time when i was like 12 and i called my dad straight and he got pretty upset and told me to never say that about him again happy pride

large sign on the front desk: Front desk will return in 5 minutes thank you person, to me for some reason: hey do you know when the front desk staff will be back me: uhh.. *points at sign* i assume in five minutes, i guess person: oh okay thanks

being depressed is annoying as fuck

my flowers make me happy

only two people came to my birthday party and i feel stupid for being upset about it

me and my mom text each other like we are writing notes in a chart “tired of deciding what to eat QD. today is chx w/potato. forgot breakfast and was NPO 18hrs” “the worst. chx w/potato satisfactory for PM meal. i got rx’d new PT movements QOD. how do you manage exercise QD? im so tired.”

got a visit from a cardinal and then a visit from his wife

medieval times: you can’t apply to be a knight, we don’t let women be knights me:

leg days goals: ashitaka at the forge bellows of irontown

i have reached “making my own suet” levels of backyard birding