hey i think i fucked up wearing this uhh this thing whatever this is anyway check out my abs #seductivesunday

right behind you, princess.

uhhh, it'll feel good?

shall we get out of here?

I'm very open minded, you're very pretty.

you got plenty of options, babe.

oh, sure, so my face is like, where my eyes and mouth are.

hey i'll leave that part up to you!

like wherever, but you know, in there.

hey girl can i shove my face in there

specifically for dating? hmm, i dunno, that's a tough one. you just gotta put yourself out there, i think.

yeah! it's not bad but there are better planets.

oh it's a big wet planet FULL of babes and insane driving laws.

like a place where they make food for people to buy?

|| just remember that bluesky has no end-to-end decryption. If you send something in a DM there are ways for people to see it. iirc another developer is developing e2e encryption on bluesky but it's only for iOS so far.

ooh is that an urf restaurant?

hell yeah, it's all my nutritional needs in one hot place.

i put chocolate chips in there too!

if you put the cereal in WITH the coffee you can save yourself MINUTES of hassle

yeah, i have that attention thingie, where you don't uhh, listen so good?

yo i just got the weirdest feeling in my central pump muscle.

@headbandsandhexes.bsky.social I can't believe I'm saying this but please tell me you just peed yourself

What's up? You don't usually drink alone. Do you?

I did! Now I'm in control so I can drink what I want. It's like, a legal loophole.

You thought I was DEAD? Valerie have some fucking faith, great green mother!

Mmm Drinkahol™

I followed the scent of booze all the way here from the top deck. Pretty impressive nose, right?

good girls don't threaten to laser their friends!

the blonde gene is the evil gene.

AND you're blonde.

wow, moving up in the world...

a job would be pretty sexy.

sweet! let's hope this blazer person likes me.

( blank stare. ) i can do *this* with my tongue, what'll this get me?

( tapping away at the device on her arm for a few seconds. ) ok, sweet! uhhh, what's the work?

oh so you won't punch me but you'll INCINERATE me? now that's classic brat behavior. i've known girls like you, i've got the scars to prove it.

yeah, i got a memo-pad on my holowatch, shoot.

you have a number? is it a big one? i'm no good at maths.

unless...? UNLESS...?

and you'll do what? get all red in the face?

literally no one.

haha you guys are hiring...?

oh hey well in that case, you're a total brat.

hey, if you say so, i'm not gonna argue with someone who can punch a hole in the moon.

yeah, that's brat-talk alright. always wanting more.

not even an interview?! c'mon dude i NEED this job. what was the job again?

my superpower? heh, that's easy. i can fold my tongue over itself. pretty goddamn impressive.

because what you need is *more* powers.

woof.