*peeks around corner* is it safe? Oh. It’s never been safe? Okay. Yeah… cool.

I’m not doing well. I’m gonna hang up my Gone Fishing sign (even though I would never go fishing… I don’t even know why I have an imaginary Gone Fishing sign…) and I know I’ve already kinda disappeared, I’m just acknowledging that I’m disappearing for a while. Until it stops hurting so much. 👋

I have seen the unfortunate app Nextdoor (which… is awful because of THOSE neighbors… you know the ones 😬) actually do good work finding lost dogs and cats. Someone locally even uses their drone to search large areas for lost pets. For FREE. (Lots of farmland and empty fields around.) Found a few.

‘Lord Of The Rings’ Reader Can’t Believe How Long It Taking Sam And Frodo To Fuck https://theonion.com/lord-of-the-rings-reader-cant-believe-how-long-it-taking-sam-and-frodo-to-fuck/

This is Rosie. She was left at the vet yesterday, and when she woke up (when did she go to sleep?!), she had a big boo-boo on her tummy. She thinks it’s unreasonable for you to expect her to just go to sleep again. Like a fool.

RT if you don't even know how the hell to open a ChatGPT tab

Oh, come on! Why am I ALWAYS Sam?!

Reminder: it’s The Onion. It’s not real. But also: They could’ve totally given these answers, so… what is “real”?

I had a Toasty who was part greyhound. He had the nose. ✨boop✨

But! If we’re talking about @poetkatiratejeda.bsky.social , then we should probably add: has impeccable taste, creative, and has a huge heart 💚💚💚 (and then give her peonies, because her birthday is coming up)

Oh, look! A thing…

You guys, apparently it’s Thursday!* *Note: Have not checked calendar for confirmation. But I’m feeling good about this. 👍

EVERY!! YEAR!!! 🤦‍♀️

I think I’m sick 🤒 Or, maybe, I’ve reached the point where I need to be sick 🤔 Sometimes a deeply depressed person needs a break, you know? 🤷‍♀️ Sure, death would be preferable, but it’s so… permanent. Who needs that? I like options.

Happy Autumnal Food Holiday!!

Do this if you see it & reshare it. Name: Whitney Pronouns: she/her Height: 5’4” Sexuality: Yes, please Sign: Virgo Piercings: Ears Tattoos: 1 Fav color: Green Favorite drink: Water Fav foods: Mangoes! 🥭 Fav animal: Manatee Status: Spinster

Gif that pops up when I type my name *gasp* I’ve never seen this one before! 🥹 I love it!!

I was trying to type “tries again” a little while ago, and autocorrect cheerfully helped me out with “tries a gay”. 🤔 I don’t know what that means.

So, apparently, I lost a ball of yarn by putting it away. It, and the needles I was using with it. I put them all away, in a safe place, designated for this purpose. I lost a ball of yarn because it was where it was SUPPOSED TO BE. Bright side? My cat’s fine.

How can I have possibly LOST a ball of yarn?! HOW?! An entire ball of light pink yarn! HOW?!

I was asleep. Then, I was wide awake. Where is this bizarre ability when I need it?!

It’s raining, then it’s going to snow. Yay! Slush! ☹️

Describe your cat’s personality with one photo.

So, apparently, this company is getting fashion tips from watching supernatural. 🤔 (Also, Behold! The emails I’ve never read! And never will!)

I don’t have JPEGs because, like, WHY?! I hate me in pictures. So. Here are some pictures of pictures. Enjoy or whatever the kids do these days.

So, Rob and Rich did this thing where their costumes were each other. When I went to do the picture, I said to him, “Hi, Rob! I’m so glad to finally meet you!” And he says, “Glad to be met!” (Note: I’m actually afraid of Rob, so… 🤷‍♀️)

I have returned home from Nashville. Some things that happened: I fell backwards off of a hotel bed. I didn’t take any more of Misha Collins’ shit. (Not accurately phrased because this would’ve been the only shit I would’ve taken from him.) I bravely walked a short distance without dying. Ate food.

So, like, I know I didn’t announce that I had a horrible headache or anything. But you’ll be relieved to know that a few hours sleeping on the floor cured it! Seriously, I thought I was going to vomit from the pain. Then, I woke up fine, wondering why I was on the floor. (In pain me sleeps on the

It’s still just Tuesday right?? I’m still safe???* *my crazy is super active today. yay. 😕

*AHEM* Now. Listen to her 👇

I spent money. 😬 I hate spending money. At least it was on a bunch of stuff rather than one thing, right? 😬 I mean… right? 😬😬😬 (I’ll have more by the end of the week, but NOT THE POINT! It feels like my credit card is mad at me.)

Bad news, people. Alex Calvert has a mustache. 😬 (Maybe this isn’t news, but it’s news to me 🤷‍♀️)

I don’t know how to dress like a girl anymore. It’s not an essential skill, but I wanna dress like a girl once in a while, you know? But without showing skin or wearing flimsy fabrics. OR dressing like I’m going out to milk some cows.

This may seem desperate but, well I kind of am. I know it’s kind of late notice, but If anyone has some free time this weekend and is willing to, I could really use some help with my DCBB fic. I’m opening my DMs, so message me if you think you want to help! TIA

I’ve been sick today. 🤒 (probably just stress) Anyway, I wake up and my call my mom, because who else cares when you don’t feel well? And it turns out she’s been puking all day. 🙄 Drama queen.* *This is a joke. Especially since her mom was super dramatic and went and died some years back. 🙄

I was reading stuff online today and this website kept calling it “The menopause”. Then there was the diagram showing the “vulva vestibule”, which my mind always fills with chairs and people reading magazines and looking at their watches. I make my own fun.

Y’all… it’s STILL 2025. wtf?!

So, I laid down to go to sleep, then I just started crying and I can’t stop. I’d rather just go to sleep.

I’m all anxious and chewing the insides of my cheeks. Well, more like tearing them apart. Anyway, my point is that I haven’t done this for MONTHS! Therefore, my cheeks are no longer numb to the pain. And it feels like I have a mouthful of shark teeth. (When did they get so sharp?!)

A drawing of @poetkatiratejeda.bsky.social during fall. (Adorable and happy!)

In my head when I woke up: open.spotify.com/track/2NIeqD...

In my head when I woke up… uh… yesterday 🤷‍♀️: open.spotify.com/track/7ioy6p...

I’m sleepy and I don’t wanna sleep. The hell?

Another yellow jacket in my room, plus a mosquito. Am I cursed?

In my head when I woke up: open.spotify.com/track/3KZVWV...

Somehow, there’s a yellow jacket in my room AGAIN. There’s no hive in our yard (no hives nearby that I’m aware of). Also, how the hell do they even get into my room, one at a time? I don’t get it. Are they emissaries from a far away hive asking for help? Government spies? 🤷‍♀️

It is now another day… as the prophecy foretold.

So, my dad woke me up this morning. He called me for the sole purpose of being mean to me. Today has sucked. Also, I have not seen my kitten today (he’s 13, but he’s still my kitten!).