Me when a British politician does this: You ****ing donkey Me when Mark Carney does it: Oh dear, oh gorgeous

Q: Did you post that picture of yourself depicted as Jesus Christ? TRUMP: I did post it and I thought it was me as a doctor and had to do Red Cross. Only the fake news could come up with that one.

Starts a fight with the leader of the Catholic church ✅ Insults Muslims after declaring he'd send Iran "back to the stone age" ✅ Sends his VP to shill for him in Hungary prompting a landslide loss ✅ Posts an image of himself as Jesus bringing back to life... Jeffrey Epstein?

A rare defeat for Putin in Western politics tonight. I suppose he can console himself with thoughts of Farage’s projected success next month.

Now, let's get rid of his pals shall we...

The face you make when you see Putin's lap dog in Europe lose an election, know that the EU can release €90bn in funds to help and, that Donald Trump sent the "Why aren't you wearing a suit?" prick to secure his demise.

I’m just so glad about how happy he’ll be and how sad they’ll be tonight.

Off you fuck, you autocratic wanker.

BREAKING: BUDAPEST, Hungary (AP) - Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orbán concedes defeat after 'painful' election result, ending 16 years in power.

All the worst cunts in the world - from journalism to politics, the Kermlin to the White House - are suffering tonight.

Hi JD Vance. I think Nigel Farage and Reform could definitely do with your help in the May elections here

Was the team talk before Italy's penalty shoot out

Hanno cominciato il processo...

Gattuso isn't to blame. The players aren't to blame. We can point fingers about stuff on the pitch as much as we want but the issues with Italian football aren't what happens in this national team. We all see it. That's what hurts.

To deal with cost of living, Spain has announced a ton of measures. One such measure is reducing VAT on electricity bills from 21% - 10%. @labouruk.bsky.social you could do the same and increase corporation tax on the utility companies who will be profiting from this. Make it make sense.

This, Carl

This is fucking nuts. Not only do you absolutely fuck up global trade you're telling the people you claim are ready to nuke the shit out of the global order that they can earn money by buying from them because you've just spent the last three weeks fucking up global trade...

Ossoff: "After years of this president trashing our allies, we learned today that the Danish govt was preparing military options to defeat a potential American invasion of Greenland just months ago. The president has treated our allies like they don't matter then demanded they come to his aid."

He's blowing shit up at the behest of a mad man and we're the ones in the shit. Well done, 'Murica. I pray that you pay $10 per gallon and your first born become terrible at wordle.

Someone tells him to start a war He starts it He offends his allies He has an idiot talk about them being "the most destructive force in history" Tells his allies to send in the ships Threatens NATO membership We are truly fucked.

mom can you pick me up at the strait of hormuz, my friends are laughing at me and wont help

I really enjoy being told what makes me a man by people who disagree with a documentary made by Louis Theroux.

Non sto dicendo che mi sono affezionato della Constantini ma...

The Blair documentary highlights just how bad Labour were with Michael Foot in charge.

This is my mate and co-pod host, (Yes, I get everything wrong about football here) Max. He's written a great series about football fandom and all I ask is that you give it a read. Thanks.

Chemmy Alcott delivers analysis with so much enthusiasm - fair play!

No billionaire should be talking about invasions when they don't pay more than minimum wage and have residency abroad to avoid paying more tax.

Early reviews are in: ‘Even if they showed this on a plane, people would still walk out’

"find romance in a ramekin" The copywriter needs to be shot. Run with smut, not clunky alliteration. "Double dip this valentine's"

How do you know you're a man in your 40s? Insta ads... - beef tallow face moisturiser (to apparently look younger) - ball trimmers (to... Apparently look young downstairs) - lymphatic brushes - to... Apparently look even younger.

The Masters final is anything but great potting.

The title of my non existent biography.

10 years ago I was gearing up for a great second year of business. Then Brexit. It fucked me and everyone else over harder than Eric Clapton writing Layla in front of George Harrison. I've never recovered. So fuck this 10 year bullshit.

Why the fuck are people posting shit from 10 years ago?

Why do all the AI generated images of "show me my partner" look like the person prompting but just, the opposite sex?

It's only the third of January

I'm sure something pretty illegal happened last night. Not seen anything on the news...

The only thing strange about Stranger Things is the level of middle management talk and planning required for every bloody fight...

The mask debate is back. By people who aren't scientists. I walked through Liverpool the other day and a woman, with a nose as red as Rudolph, eyes as glassy as a James Patterson novel spluttered everywhere. I'm sure that has nothing to do with how I'm feeling this morning...

Now THAT was a snooker final!

You shouldn't have to work every fucking Saturday and Sunday to be able to pay the bills.

Quite clearly - or not - a joke. I don't like that I worked for a year for free to have my style copied by the people who pay their PR person but never thought once to help their friend.

I fucking love it when people copy my photography style.

What an absolute fuck up...

Why do PR people always make the awards their clients win about themselves? The countless hours their client spends working, dealing with shit, finding a way to pay the bills and these twats turn up "hanging out with my clients" when all they did was submit a form and write a few press releases...

Well, well, well….

I'm sorry but, I'm watching TV and a woman who is struggling with bills and annoyed with Labour is saying that she is voting for Reform next time because "they are for working people." There is a devoid of critical thinking in the UK. I'm sick of people being thick for no fucking reason.

This is Biggie. He can't believe this was your pick for movie night. Gonna need a cartoon before bed so he doesn't have nightmares. 14/10 (TT: x_gzm0714)

I've said it for years. This is what Farage wants and those who said "I'm not talking about you" in the Brexit debate remain, to this day, the biggest clueless cluster fuckers in my life. Imagine being kicked out of your own home because flag shaggers are irrational fuckwits. Arrivederci.

Has anyone else subjected themselves to the drivel that Kostatin Kisin has written? Warning us that he warned us about cancel culture? He fails to mention that not one centre left government in the west has appointed broadcasting chairs that wrote gleefully about censorship. Biased nonsense.