got fired on my first day as an NBA arena DJ because I played the twin peaks soundtrack too much 🫩

(after burning an effigy) Alright, nice work, gang. That's a great start, but remember the real guy's still out there.

having depression and no structure in your day to day life is so awesome until you have to interact with one single person providing a service to you

This is excellent www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-...

Could be worse. Probably will be.

What if instead of flat the earth was really long #longearth

Texting my dad like a boomer

Children in bed before 9 and a Wolves win,,, god is smiling on me this evening

i got a 911 text from an eviction-defense attorney today who had a client who needed nearly $5,000 to prevent her eviction i was all ready to barn-raise for it. but then—what’s that? the community-run rent fund in her area had the resources to cover it! need met! done! another world is possible.

ouuuurrrrghghhhhhhh

Had a bonfire by myself in the yard and drank some weed beverages now I’m in bed and I’m really high you guys

the woke mob now that they have to say Pepsi's ok

Text from my dad

It’s OVER it’s fucking over

And on the third day Jesus rose from the dead and was like don’t TALK to me til I’ve had my coffee 🤣🤣🤣

Going unconscious for the night

JoEllen Beed

the timberwolves are either good or bad. they are either going to win in the playoffs or lose. i am either going to live forever or die one day.

Hey it’s me the idiot who makes coffee at home everyday and buys individual bags of beans on an as-needed basis and now I have to go out in a thunderstorm to buy coffee so I can have some tomorrow!!!!

My favorite weapon in my inventory is probably my corrupted beacon

the reason I have such a lifelong struggle with making and keeping friends is I never went to daycare

there are two absolutely canonical Good Friday posts

One of the baby classes at my kid’s daycare made AI pictures of all the babies as astronauts

Maybe if I sleep on my back it will undo all other unvirtuousness

I’m ready.I’m OVER the day shift.

I’ve only known Crus Henderson for 30 seconds but I am in love with him

Bad Wolves loss

Been rewatching Deadwood, probably the best show ever.. can you imagine if it came out today. Just imagining most people missing 1/3 of every episode due to being on phone and constantly being like what the FUCK is going on

Ummmm hello??

Took my kids to see the new Mario movie and it was really good SYKE it was actually bad. April fools

March

Ouurrrghhhhh I have moon Madness

I hate him so much look at him

Gonna meet up with our neighbors at the zoo….. I got tickets for 11:30… I made myself more coffee… I still have to shower… it’s 10:55 and it takes 20 minutes to get there

Every time I listen to this song now I weep. I’m really going through it lately lol.

(not seeing a way out) that’s ok…. I’m sure I can go around

Or 53-29 whatever

man I need a cup of serious mud brother

My son asked me what “lowkey” means because he hears other kids use it and it just feels really wrong as a parent to explain children’s slang to a child. Being chronically online has compressed the generation gap and there’s something unholy about it.

❗️Minneapolis (and surrounding areas) friends: I’m trying to help a friend find a place to live here who’s coming from out of state. Any leads are appreciated!!! ISO mainly studios or cool roommates in a pinch. Thank uuuuu

who the hell is that

Watched a few eps of Neighbors and I’m dismayed by a deepening societal suicide fueled by decades of “rugged individualism” telling people they don’t need community to thrive!!!!!! What a disgusting notion!!!!

museum maxing or whatever

Nooo babe I love your Norwood Scale 3 hairline.

The Rokuhoma City Thunders

fuckkkk we’re playing Roku City on Tuesday

My bf showed me a site where I can see who has me blocked on here so I looked and I learned information and now I feel bad.