It’s the first day of the month. Don’t forget to say “Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit” for good luck.

Frankly, we expected better from a FIFA Peace Prize winner.

We feel seen.

MMCMXCVIII MMCMXCIX MMM…

Back and forth Back and forth Back and forth Sigh

Whenever our publisher sees people who are out jogging early in the morning, she always thinks the same thing. “Wow, I can’t believe I’m up this early.”

Twitter in the form of a single account, then? 🫢

We’re considering a change in format: 24/7 Flame Wars.

Gazette Marcus Aurelius quote of the day (with apologies to Pierre Poilievre): “It is no more possible that the stupid should not do the things they do, than that the fig-tree should not have juice in its figs, or that a babe should not cry.”

In speech, Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre quotes Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius. That’s it. That’s the joke.

Gazette Tip: The price of cocaine can be very volatile. If you’re going to invest in the cocaine spot market, be cautious.

A separate real estate website for Oak Bay. It’s called #$ILLOW

NOW you tell us!!! (BC Ferries posts without context)

Forecasters are calling for powerful winds, over 30 centimeters of snow, and hazardous travel conditions. There’s also a costal flooding alert. There will be no Gazette home delivery as a result. Yes, it’s in Halifax, but you can’t be too careful.

Some guy in Patagonia is emailing us pictures of people in parkas. And he expects us to send him money. What a scam.

Gazette Factoid: A surprising amount of responsibility also comes with zero power.

Our Consumer Editor has a review in tomorrow’s paper of electric toothbrushes. She wanted to hand in a longer article but she couldn’t find any acoustic toothbrushes.

Our friend Steveston Ships ( @stevestonships.bsky.social ) is THIS CLOSE to 100 first mates. If you’re a fan of boats (and some very clever humor) check them out. A positive addition to your Bluesky feed.

Congratulations to Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor on his future role as a Fox News commentator.

We were going to do a story on this, but no one in the newsroom can spell Listeria monocytogenes or Staphylococcus aureus.

The Oak Bay Gazette: Follow us for in-depth ethnocentric content.

Important Budget Update: Provincial bulk ink subsidy remains in place.

This is the year of the horse. The problem is our publisher is still drawing a snake on her cheques.

This is the Year of the Horse. It represents a wild spirit that refuses to be "reined in." So…it’s got Oak Bay written all over it.

Don’t forget to sing the official Friday the 13th song: Voorhees a Jolly Good Fellow.

When the canvas frays in the vessel of thought and a stain of ocean blackens beneath you, may there come across the waters a path of yellow moonlight to bring you safely home. - John O'Donohue

The year 2025 marked one of the most dangerous periods for journalists in U.S. history. Our 2025 Impact Report takes a comprehensive look at how attacks on the press escalated and how we supported journalists.

Gazette Ichthyology Factoid: When fish laugh too hard, they dry their pants.

Gazette Factoid: Here in Oak Bay you can get an Olympic medal for leaving your signal light on.

The only reason you’re seeing townhouses going up in Oak Bay is because we’ve depleted our strategic NIMBY reserves.

Maybe the strategy is to rename every lake Lake Louise.

Should we tell them this is Moraine Lake?

Stop by and pick up our new coffee table book. It’s perfect if you need something that is always in the way.

Great. Just great. Bitcoin has lost half its value since October. And our publisher was getting ready to put in an offer on Riffington.

Is Oak Bay a throwback to times gone by? Well, yes. We ignore the temporal prime directive and frequently pollute the timeline. We apologize for any inconvenience.

Our publisher took the dog out for a walk today and found a bone saw in the grass at Uplands Park. Call our switchboard if it’s yours and we’ll get it back to you.

Congratulations to Oak Bay for being named the 12th most livable community in Canada. But we’re not sure these two announcements go together on the Oak Bay website.

Do you think the programmers at TV New Zealand get the irony here.

It’s the first day of the month. Don’t to say “Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit” for good luck.

Stop by our employee cafeteria tomorrow and enjoy the soup of the day. Ennui, with allspice.

Here in Oak Bay we’re very pet friendly. People friendly is an entirely different matter.

News Item: Poilievre addresses delegates ahead of bid to retain leadership. Turns out, when he was talking about “A good job with a beautiful home, on a safe street, under our proud flag.” he was talking about himself.

It’s January 29th and the Camellia in front of the publisher’s house in Oak Bay is feeling frisky. So for those in the east , there’s hope. #YYJ #YYZ #YOW #YUL

Gazette Tip: If you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. And nearly 100% of the shots you do take. Hockey may not be your game.

Do you have what it takes to make a valuable contribution to a vibrant community? If not, there are about 65 homes listed for sale in Oak Bay right now.

May have to change our name to Steveston Battleships.

Sure, it’s Hollywood. But our movie editor was watching this movie from 40 years ago and there was something about this scene that reminded him of the current state of Canada-U.S. relations.

🎶There’s something about an AquaVelva man!🎶 Yes. He smells bad…and he’s cheap. @cheknews.ca

Gazette Factoid: In clown college, every classroom has a well-behaved student.

Something odd just happened. A subscriber just walked up to our publisher, shook her hand and said “Thank you for not being a doctor.”