The eats are a little TOO good in this town

Why hasn’t this perfect joke made me famous yet

When the Tin Man tells them to bang on his chest and Scarecrow says “Beautiful! What an echo!” and the Tin Man says “It’s empty” I just wanna be like LEARN TO TAKE A COMPLIMENT, SIR.

My current ear worm is the ending credits song from “The Facts of Life”, which in my opinion is even better than the opening credits song. youtu.be/24ctg5CxT7E?...

If our flight to New Orleans gets cancelled on Sunday we will be taking the full cash refund and spending the next three days eating good Chinese food on our sofa.

Friendly reminder: If your flight gets canceled or massively delayed in the coming weeks and you booked directly with the airline, you are entitled to a refund, not just a voucher. But you have to decline any rebooked flight, credit, miles, or voucher they offer.

I went to Flatbush proper for an eye exam and on the way home I bought Campari tomatoes for literally 1/10 of the price they cost me half a mile away in Kensington. Also the eye place was a 100x better than the bougie place I went to last year in Park Slope.

Older people on the bus use headphones challenge

Query: when you eat a filbert and it makes you itchy so you take an allergy pill, is that post-nut Claritin?

I had a horrible horrible night where I couldn’t reach a friend and couldn’t get to her home and couldn’t reach anyone who could so had to call a wellness check but the police took 6 hours to respond despite repeated calls. She turned out to be fine, just changed phone#’s and forgot to tell anyone.

EPISODE 9 IS AVAILABLE! Join us as we watch “Thor: The Dark World” and try to answer such burning questions as “Has Tavie’s opinion changed on Chris Hemsworth at all?”, “What’s Zachary Levi doing here?”, “Did nobody proofread these trivia cards?” & more! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/z...

Happy happy happy birthday to the wonderful @therachel.bsky.social! One of my favorite Internet people of all time. I hope you get the best of the best! 💛🍍🐈

Head in hands wondering how this could happen to me, the popular president who posted a video of myself shitting on everyone 2 weeks ago

The next mayor of NYC is gonna be younger than me but we went to the same high school!

I wish Mrs Garrett were a real person and Edna’s Edibles was a weed bakery

Happy birthday week to our own @therachel.bsky.social 🥳 This week on Chart Chat we get a mention of “You Light Up My Life” by Debby Boone, a song that annoys me for more than the usual reasons - namely, it beat out “Candle on the Water” from “Pete’s Dragon” as best song from the Oscars that year.

Happy birthday to the soft-serve queen herself, Tante Joan. World traveler, excellent cook, problem-solver, advice-giver, wino, greatest aunt in recorded history and above all, ice cream connoisseur! 🍦

When we were 8 or 9 our parents left my sister and me in a hotel room for a few hours while they went out to dinner and the Twilight Zone episode of “The Facts of Life” came on tv and we were SO SCARED.

Voted early and voted for Mamdani. Get out and vote, NYC!

That dinner in Clue looked horrible. Shark’s fin soup and monkey’s brains. No accompaniments. Don’t offer guests fruit and dessert, just serve it to them. They were too polite to say they were still starved after that horrible meal.

I walk in and my husband is watching this. I love him so.

I ordered too much Halloween candy for my dad to give out. So my husband… brought it home. Noooooooooooo. I ONLY BUY THE GOOD STUFF. NOW WE’RE GONNA EAT IT ALL. Take it to WORK. 😩

I missed Dad tonight, my sis sent me pics though. Look how adorable.

This excellent Dopey also loved my pin bag and asked me who my favorite Disney character was and when I pointed to Elliot the dragon he said “There’s room for everyone in this world” and I came very close to high-fiving him.

I was the weird childless auntie with my friends trick-or-treating with their kiddo. Cobble Hill goes hard for Halloween! This is nothing like Dyker Heights in the 80s!

Halloween is the day we let our witchy stripe show!

Happy Halloween from li’l me and the sorceress costume my mommy made me

My parents were married 55 years ago today!

I was on the phone for two. Full. Hours. Today. With Optimum trying to question a charge on my too-high Internet bill and then trying to cancel my service because they charge us $153/mo for very, very bad service. The guy in the retentions department openly insulted me. It was ASTOUNDING.

Tante Joan is doing well after her knee surgery yesterday. Her freezer is acting up and one of her neighbors came by to check on her and give her fresh-baked scones (!!!) and then brought her ice from his own freezer to fill her therapeutic ice machine. See, NYC is actually just a nice little town.

We told you we would do it 🤷‍♂️

I got to spend some time with my friend Dave Foley yesterday and he gave me a hug and kissed my cheek and really that’s all I ask for once in awhile, universe, just let me see that cutie once in awhile.

I regret to inform you all that I will be missing Halloween, the Pulitzer Prize Awards dinner, and two livestreams of my favorite podcasts, this week, in order to take care of my aunt after her knee surgery. Please save me some peanut butter cups shaped like pumpkins.

RIP Prunella Scales

According to my social media feed, people have been watching a baseball game today that started when my grandma came to America (circa 1909.)

So fun to see my friend Paul Myers at The Strand (sacred location in my family!) in conversation with his brother Mike about his new book “John Candy: A Life in Comedy”. And bonus fun running into my friends Joan LeMay & Dave Foley & even friendly acquaintance Dave Hill. Truly a cavalcade of stars!

Great episode this week, particularly loved the special spooky version of #ChartChat. @therachel.bsky.social deemed the theme from “Ghostbusters” as “not scary” but when I was a little kid I was legitimately scared of the line “an invisible man sleeping in your bed”.

The scene in “Bride of Frankenstein” where Monster & Hermit are having a nice little party and then these hunters come in and fuck everything up, one of them says “Can’t you see he’s the monster?” and the other goes “He’s blind!” and then goes STRAIGHT TO “He isn’t human! The monster made him!”

Tubi now has all of the Looney Toons cartoons in their catalog, packaged into 20 minute episodes of several shorts each in reverse chronological order. It can be hard to find specific cartoons so some intrepid Redditor has listed them all out: www.reddit.com/r/looneytune...

My aunt as a spy for Halloween! A spy with a mustache! Why not!

We took Mrs Apell a.k.a Mom#2 out for a very belated birthday celebration / “meeting of the Tantes” (Steph obviously there but not pictured) at the good Korean place in Staten Island. Tante Joan and Mrs Apell talked about their knee surgeries.

Happy Halloween from Murgatroyd, my aunt’s pet gargoyle

Pierre in his Cabbage Patch kid costume!

One of the things I'm proudest of in life is that the earliest citation for the word 'awesomesauce' in the OED comes from an alt.tv.kids-in-hall Usenet thread from 2001 in which I participated.

We’re so sorry about there not being a new episode of “Zach and Tavie’s Marvelous adventure” today. Rest assured, we’re hard at work getting the Thor: The Dark World episode finished up as soon as possible!

I’ve been on antidepressants for so long I think only theatre makes me really cry anymore

If I were to make a podcast about “Into the Woods” it would be called “Where’s the Cheesecloth?”

I don’t do “stage door” but we happened to exit “Little Bear Ridge Road” at the same time as my favorite living actress, Laurie Metcalf so I took a little creepy paparazzi shot before we hit the road and she climbed into her car with her fluffy little white doggo

It’s not that I’m pleased about what they’re doing to the actual White House building but it’s just they’re doing so much more that is so much worse that I don’t have the energy to care about the building itself Which I guess is what they want

I shouldn’t have watched s3 of “The Diplomat” so fast because I have no more episodes to watch and it was so so good that nothing else seems good