Nope, I have no idea why the carpet smells like "whoopie". Maybe the leprechaun made the house smell awful by putting his stinky bottom on the carpet?? #StinkyBottomedMonster #HumidityBringsOutTheFunk #dogsofbsky

@baileyandbrawny.bsky.social TED-E-HUMPZALOT, crime fighter extraordinare, says thank you for letting him borrow my raincoat!! He is so freaking cute!!

YAYYY, it's my true love Teddy!! I love you SOO much!! I cant wait to smooch you!!! Wait. Oh WAIT!! I never agreed to #HumptyDumpty in front of the Hoos!! MOOOOM!! #SlowDownTeddy #Dogsofbluesky #Dogs

Listen Mr. Giraffe, what happens in the living room while Mom is gone, STAYS in the living room. No more telling Mom who got into her jacket or knocked things over while she was out. 😤 #TotallyInncocentMonster #MrGiraffeDidItNotMe #Dogs

Nope, I know absolutely nothing about how the bag of cookies, plate, paper towels & bag got on the floor. At least I didnt eat the cookies, I just crumbled them. And where is my Thanks? Its #TotallyYourFault for leaving a window open & a leprechaun came in to wreak havoc. #DamnLeprechaun

Listen, I AM OBVIOUSLY playing "Hard to get!!" It's #TotallyNotMyFault that Teddy is SOO cute and we are SO excited to go to the beach. #AndChaosEnsues #MonsterInSoMuchLove #PoorTeddy #Dogs #DogsOfBluesky

Noooo, that is DEFINITELY not me with a spicyTikka Masala package from the trash. Obviously, @moose-rocky.bsky.social Rocky came over again & set me up!! Yep. Not Me. Nope. #ThievingMonsterWithHotPoopsToCome #Dogsofbsky #Dogs

Look, its #TotallyYourFault that you left me alone to go swim. I'm just trying to help you clean the house by taking the trash out. One piece at a time. You always bitch that I'm of no help. 🤷🏼 #SuperHelpfulMonster #dogs #dogsofbsky

Look, it's #TotallyYourFault that you left me all alone with no sister to play with. These are MY potty bags, leash, raincoat and snacks, so what's the problem? #IWillNeverGrowOutOfThis #BabyMonsterNeedsAPomPomSisterASAP

Listen, I keep telling you that I don't need a gentle leader. Obviously you aren't very bright, since I've eaten about 8 of them. Its #TotallyYourFault for leaving me home with no new sister. Thats why I got your jacket,shorts, leash & harness out. How else do I entertain myself?! #SuperBadMonster

Yes, I am FULLY aware that we already took a super long walk. But that was like, 2 whole hours ago. Now get off your 🍑 and let's GO!!! Lets go find Teddy for shenanigans! I'll just sit here blocking the TV until we go. #PainInThe🍑Monster #PoorTiredSoreMom

What do you mean "a bit too much"? This IS me playing hard to get. My boyfriend Teddy is just TOO adorable not to smush is face & kiss his mouth & smell his 🙈 & kiss his nose. #MonsterInLoveAgain #SoNotSubtle #PoorTeddy #dogs #dogsofbsky

What part of "these glasses are ugly" did you not understand mom? I know you didn't even get to try them on and they were free, but I'm just helping you out. Orange is NOT your color. #MonsterStyling #YesIDidItAgain #FreePetMonster

Please refer to appropriate instructions when assembling your doodle. #MonsterGymnastics #TimeToCleanUnderTheDresser #HowInTheHellIsThisComfy

Look, I keep telling you that these glasses are ugly, yet you KEEP replacing them. Apparently, I'm going to have to keep eating them until you learn. I don't want to be seen in public with you wearing them. #MonsterStylist #MomsMutteringAgain #IWantANewSister

Listen, you told me not to RUN with scissors, but never said anything about me eating them. Its #TotallyYourFault that u left them on the counter & abandoned me. And yes, I DID need to get into EVERYTHING. #TimeForANewSister #ForTheLoveOfGodMonster 😳

SO HELP ME!! He's gonna be my dinner. 😡😤

Seriously?! This little fricking fracking thing again? @caseychasem.bsky.social Im gonna need backup!! Again!! I'm beginning to think its personal. 😡😤 #LittleBastard #Dogs

Nope, that DEFINITELY isn't me thieving the paper plate. Its quite obvious that @moose-rocky.bsky.social Rocky came over & set me up! I would NEVER do such a thing!! 😇 #NopeNotMe #ThievingMonster #Dogs Please excuse our messy kitchen.

Look, its not my fault that you left a tiny morsel of turkey on a paper plate for me to thieve. Its a toy and a snack in one!! You obviously need more exercise. Your welcome. #ThievingWildMonster #MomsTooTiredForThis #PoorMom #Dogs

Yes, yes I DID need to sneak onto the counter & eat your leftover chicken. First of all, you made me go get groomed, so I deserve it. 2nd of all, you shouldn't be wasting chicken. 3rd of all, I don't mind if I get the squirts, it was #TotallyWorthIt 4th, gotta keep you on your toes #ThievingMonster

Seriously?!! Hey @caseychasem.bsky.social can I get some help here? I still don't understand why mom won't just open the door and let me have a delicious dinner 🤷🏼😤 #FrickenFrackenSquirrel #PureEvil

This is how it went with the measuring stuck. You would think she would know better by now. 🤷🏼🤣 She's WAY too tired to be trying this. 🤣

Listen, if your dumb enough to leave me home alone, then you should expect me to entertain myself. Why would I want toys when I have the trash that you EXPLICITLY told me to stay out of?? #RebelMonster #WhatTrash #Dogs

Look, I obviously have no toys to play with, so I'm FORCED to play with your stinky old slipper. And now I can't even chew on it?! 😤 (Don't look in the other corner at my piles and piles of toys) #SendToysSoMomWontBitch #dogs #dogsofbsky

Nope, I see absolutely nothing wrong with your sunglasses. I'm 99.99% sure that they came like that. Its #TotallyYourFault for buying faulty sunglasses that just fall apart. Yep. #MonsterShoppingTips #WhyIsMomYelling #dogs #dogsofbsky

At @pennylanepup.bsky.social suggestion, added the audio.

Pro tip for first day of spring

Nothing says true friendship, like your friend eating your head. This is my new pal Sheba, the giant GSD. I absolutely love to annoy her & her Dad. Its a good thing I'm so cute & sweet.

Listen here, birthday giraffe. Stop telling Mom what happens around here when she's gone!! Thats between us! #SayNoToTattling #NoIDidntGetInTheHamper #Dogs #DogofBsky

Nooo, I DEFINITELY was NOT eating my toes. I have absolutely no idea what your talking about. Obviously, i stepped in water. Nope, no licking my toes at all. #WetToedMonster #SayNoToBenedryl #SoggyCouch #Dogs #Dogsofbsky

Nope, I definitely did NOT spit out my benadryl. I have no idea what your talking about Mom. That is just some pink paint on my leg. Yep. Obviously, you are losing it. As usual. #NoMedsMonster #LetTheGamesBeginAgain #dogs #dogsofbluesky

When all else fails, just eat the rug. Right @satanshouse.com ? #MonsterInteriorDesigns #TheMoreYouKnow #Dogs #Dogsofbluesky #Dogsofbsky

I believe this is the definition of F#ck Around and Find out? Right @caseychasem.bsky.social ? I had nothing to do with the now tail-less lil bastard, but dumb ol Mom is looking for him to make sure he's ok. #FAFO #MonsterPestControlService #Dogs #Dogsofbluesky #Dogsofbsky

Gonna hit the gym. Back in a few minutes.

Me and Steve (my dad is so lazy he hasn’t take Steve out of the car since Halloween) are headed out to get a new harness cause I ate mine (on accident) and it’s hanging on by a thread. Happy Caturday! #dogsofbluesky #samoyed #princessofdarkness

Good morning furiends!! This is the latest update for donations. Pet food welcomed too!! The address is on the bottom if you would like to ship through Amazon/Walmart/Chewy. Thank you!!!

Aunt Lisa found this sweet gal wandering. No chip, so Mom decided to let her lead & hope that she would take us to her house. 3 MILES later, mom was exhausted and we finally heard that she lived 6 houses down from where Aunt Lisa found her. 🙄😂 Then,Mom dropped her phone & shattered her screen. Sigh

Yes, yes I did need to dump half of my head into my water bowl. And now I'm going to dry it off on the side of the couch. Feel free to clean up the puddles on the kitchen floor after your coffee. #SoppingWetMonster #Dogs #Dogsofbluesky #Dogsofbsky

Listen, its not MY problem that you lifted too much stuff yesterday & "feel like u got hit by a donation truck". Yes, your old. Now get your 🍑 up & take me on an adventure. I'll let you decide where, but it better be 2 hours worth. Ok, one. And a half. #PoorSoreMom #Dogs #Dogsofbluesky #Dogsofbsky

Seal Beach Animal Care Center is SO thankful for everything! They have been able to pull dogs from Pasadena to make room & adopted out some long time residents! Thank you SOOOO much to EVERYONE who has donated! You can see all the updates from Chef Andrew Gruel and Lauren Gruel.

Listen, unless you buy me some new giant toys, you can't complain that I'm FORCED to find something else to play with. Its #TotallyYourFault that I'm bored. Your old flat pillow is just fine. #ThievingBabyMonster #Dogs #Dogsofbluesky #Dogsofbsky

Gee Mom, thanks for leaving me all of an inch back here. 🙄 You better take me for a long adventure after this!! Off we go to take more donations. Pray for all the LA fire victims. #SquishedMonster #Dogs #Dogsofbluesky #Dogsofbsky

The little bastard had the nerve to knock on the window & stare, because their water bowl was empty. Mom was dumb enough to fill it back up. Sigh. #EvilSquirrels #Dogs #Dogsofbluesky #Dogsofbsky

And now for a laugh, SQUIRREL PORN!! These #FrickenFracken squirrels have no shame. Nothing like waking up to this. 🙄 #NoLongerVirginEyedMonster #Dogs #Dogsofbluesky #Dogsofbsky

SoCal friends, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. A few things I wish I’d known as we evacuated ahead of a wildfire (that took our home in 2021) 🧵

@benniepup1.bsky.social Have u heard from @guccipooh.bsky.social ??

Items needed for fire victims if u can help! Please ship/drop off at Calico Fish House: 16600 Pacific Coast Hwy HB, CA 92649 They are taking u hauls to LA. new socks new underwear shoes feminine products toiletries (soap, lotion, toothpaste) Emphasis on kids shoes (all sizes) Dog/cat food (mix)

A few of our fosters are in the evacuation zone. Please pray for them. Here are the animal #evacuation #shelters #PalisadesFire #AnimalSelter

Hollywood is under evacuation orders. This is absolutely insane & terrifying. Please pray for LA.