Don’t worry, everyone. The Secretary of Defense used to be on ‘Fox & Friends.’ He wasn’t ‘Fox,’ though; he was just one of the ‘Friends.’

Nothing in the world sparks in me the sudden need to get up and go take five minutes making a cup of coffee than sitting down with my laptop and a desire to write something. Stupid brain.

Ever see someone on TV and think, ‘Oh my god how old are they?’ And then you google them and it turns out they’re YOUR age? I mean that’s never happened to me, but one day it will and it will SUCK.

Someone on Trump’s staff needs to arrange a meeting for him with this guy.

Okay fine I’ll watch this Trump presser/meltdown thing. But I’m having an IPA.

- you could never pay me enough to do this thing i do not want to do - here is fifty dollars - okay fine

"while I have you" no no no, that wasn't part of the deal

That was fucking excellent.

I think it would be fun to have a middle name starting with ‘V’ so that I could pretend each of my signatures was a Supreme Court case citation.

Years ago, my little brother was telling our mom about an argument he got into with another kid. And quoting himself as part of his anecdote, he said, “And I go, ‘I don’t give a BLEEP’S ASS.’”

At the end of a day like this, it’s nice that at least we can all join together, take a deep breath, and [/falls down a flight of stairs]

Among the truest things I’ve read in a while.

Ok, THIS is what a proper Democratic response sounds like. Why is this so hard for the current leadership?

Screw this, I’m heading out for a run. If I can make it to the coast, I’ll just keep going.

BECOME UNGOVERNABLE

What's everyone's favorite Avatar quote? Mine is: “People will come, Avatar. The one constant through all the years, Avatar, has been baseball. Pandora has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It's been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt, and erased again. But baseball has marked the time.”

In 2025, I lost my job AND my marriage, along with having somewhere around 20 seizures (thanks, brain). But here at the end of 2025, I have lined up an apartment for myself and have sorted out my health insurance situation. So in spite of everything, I couldn’t be more excited for 2026. ✌️

🥹

When I’m home with my kids, with my Pandora ‘90s Alternative station blaring, and I’m singing along with EVERY WORD.

Today marks ten years since my very first seizure, at the age of 37. I had at least a few that day, and a decade later I’ve had a couple hundred more, plus three brain surgeries, dozens of MRIs, and countless hospital stays. BUT I’M STILL HERE, PEOPLE. 🥳✌️ #epilepsyawareness

So far, the 21st Century really is like ‘Whose Line Is It Anyway?’ Everything is made up and the points don’t matter.

Yesterday morning I had a seizure, 3 months to the day since my previous one. This one was around my 20th seizure of the year, and I’m very aware that many others with epilepsy have them much more frequently than I do. Nevertheless, this Thanksgiving weekend, I’m just grateful I’m still alive.

Eagles are making me wish I had hit the Black Friday deals at the liquor store.

We now go live to the value of Trump’s public response to anything that happens on any given day, ever.

My favorite line from Trump today was, “You know, I don’t have any sons, but if I ever do I might name him Zohran.”

Bye, Dick Cheney.

He won’t be, naturally, but Trump should be impeached for this entire operation.

I wrote a brief thing today that has a special place in my heart and head for a lot of reasons. jrh612.medium.com/where-4d34a1...

Just watched the clip of Mitch McConnell falling like seven straight times.

Amen to this. ⬇️

Listening to the Cure and day drinking. It’s like I’m 14 again.

I’m no expert (on much of anything, really), but it sure seems to me that Trump ordering missile strikes killing people in boats off the coast of Venezuela should be getting a LOT more attention.

Has Alex Jones accused the Supreme Court of being crisis actors yet?

I’d like to thank the Uber driver who earlier today spent our entire ride talking about how beautiful nature is and how much he loves being outside. It was exactly the sort of non-cynical moment I very much needed, at exactly the right time.

BREAKING: Justice Department to exhume, reanimate, indict Donald Trump’s father.

Today I have decided to willfully ignore everything that is total bullshit. Using this strategy, I figure I’ll be able to go back to sleep in 5… 4… 3…

The absence of the ‘automatic runner on 2nd to start each extra inning’ in the postseason is a tacit admission by Major League Baseball that it’s a stupid, stupid rule. In this seven-part essay, I will…

Hold my calls (I do not have any calls).

This is not a person who should even be allowed to guess the nuclear codes.

‘One Battle After Another’ is fucking fantastic.

Post something random or have an awful October

Why I post

As a card-carrying member of Antifa, I am *stunned* to learn that Antifa is an “organization.” I made this card with crayons and an old Covid vaccination record.

Share your favorite black and white movie

I am “I see a routine tackle in an NFL game and say ‘oh gosh’ out loud” years old.

Proud Villanova alum here alone in my living room, rooting for the Cats to hold Penn State under 700 points.

Seeing A Crow

It is with great regret that I inform you I have decided to put on pants today.

1,000 times this ⬇️