I get that the news cycle is packed right now, but I just heard from a colleague at the Smithsonian that this is fully a GIANT SQUID BEING EATEN BY A SPERM WHALE and it’s possibly the first ever confirmed video according to a friend at NOAA 10 YEAR OLD ME IS LOSING HER MIND (a thread 🧵)

the mess they’re in

OH MY GOD

[Gay Beatles] Yesterday All my troubles were so fucking gay

dunno if any other rugby heads are still up but Fiji are comfortably beating the clock against Canada at 38-3 with 33 gone

Lowering the flags on 9/11 at the Guantanamo Bay McDonald's for Charlie Kirk is the most dril tweet thing that's ever happened

I am hearing that on his deathbed Charlie Kirk received the light of Islam and unhesitatingly recited the Shahāda. Even now he looks down on the Ummah from the gardens of Jannah. Truly there is no god but God, and Mohammed is his prophet!

rest in piss chaz

"I think it's worth to have a cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the Second Amendment to protect our other God-given rights" - Charlie Kirk, 2023 www.mediamatters.org/charlie-kirk...

graham linehan would be so good for catapulting over a castle wall to destroy your enemy's morale

hmm another BF dogshot in the ruck you say

is that not a clear head shot from Brunt at the breakdown? seems the Black Ferns have bit of the old ABs invisibility cloak.

up da ra

Just saw an ad for the new Google Pixel and the focus was how good the AI was and the example they showed was a guy at the store holding up a bunch of cilantro to his camera and the phone telling him it was cilantro. Bro they already tell you that at the store.

– Graham Linehan: "It's sissy porn." – Julia Faure Walker KC: "You must be more familiar with it than me." – Graham Linehan: "Oh, I am — I really am."

following the turbo meltdown of a certain banana cunt while watching some shit preseason rugby, folks , it’s friday

Me and my friends would’ve killed Mundy with hammers I can tell you that much.

well ain't this place a geographical oddity?

i met anubis in the realm of the underworld, big strong guy by the way, had a dog’s head, i’m not so sure about that. and he said to me, mr president, you’ve got the heaviest soul we’ve ever weighed down here. can you believe it? they’ve never seen a soul that heavy in all of duat

FUCKING BLOW IT UP REF

this cunt fucking dead yet?

Everyone Involved In Pizza's Preparation, Delivery, Purchase Extremely High https://theonion.com/everyone-involved-in-pizzas-preparation-delivery-purc-1819564897/

the roman empire would have loved vaping

MORPHEUS: They're coming for you, Neo. I can guide you, but you must do exactly as I say. Take the elevator to the lobby and go to the CVS across the street. Purchase 5 Steam gift cards at $200 each. Scratch off the protective coating on the back and tell me the fifteen digit redemption codes. Hurry

Our pals The Mary Wallopers have just been pulled off stage and the PA shut down at VictoriousFest in Portsmouth for taking out a 🇵🇸 flag and saying Free Palestine Speak up against genocide in England and you're treated like a criminal Up the Mary Wallopers 💚🤍🧡 Free Palestine! Free the 6 counties!

Perhaps, one day, schoolkids will study this squalid little chapter in British terror-panic history. When they do, I hope these two headlines from today are printed side by side, with clear annotation of which individual faced more outrage and condemnation.

Every ICE agent moves like they have an equipment load over 75%.

trad guy posting another eerie AI photo of a blonde family standing by the Parthenon from his freshman dorm room: The soul yearns for a world unpoisoned by degeneracy! Ictinus and Callicrates fucking their brains out in the fields of Elysium: ma Appollona! Athênai has fallen to the barbarian pornē!

this one

Bill: Some of them Eldar ladies are real pretty... Hank: Bill, what would the Emperor say about that kind of talk? Boomhauer: Hey man, talmbout dang ol' heresy man, got dem Ordo Hereticus comin' up in here like ++EXTERMINATUS++ pew pew, boom Hank: Heh. You said it, Boomhauer-servitor

Stephen Miller Tears Up As Son Says First 14 Words

when the videos of monkeys being surprised by magic tricks came out some people were like “it’s not funny that’s actually traumatic and upsetting to the monkeys” and i think of it every time i see a guy sincerely talking to ai

Stay salty DC 🔥

i think we should slay the draft kings and institute a reign of terror in which anyone suspected of sports betting is executed in the streets

DWARF CONTRACTOR: *on the phone* alright so tell me this, BEFORE hand, how greedily were you digging.. uh huh... and how deeply? okay, I don't even need to come out, I can tell ya right now you gotta balrog. I'm gonna be honest with ya, does this mine hold any sentimental value

most cutting thing you can say is "who's this clown?" because it implies they're a) a clown & b) not even one of the better-known clowns

me at 14: lol the bible has a prohibition on necromancy. superstitious morons. i'm so glad i live in an enlightened age me at 37: shit i guess you actually gotta hand it to 'em on this one

you can't just go around as an adult man calling yourself Markwayne. please be serious