i just want women friends dude im so alone

you still dont believe?

my approach to everything is just accepting i am wrong about everything and to let others steer the ship for me. accepting whatever happens to me. nothing is in my control. things just happen to me and thats what everything is

someone come over and do this with me

had to order a new credit card bc mines about to expire, little did i know that would turn my current card off lol. so i have no money, no food and no gas for a week i guess

i want a job to have money to buy CDs

beautiful short wavy dark haired artsy cis woman with bangs that wants nothing to do with me and smells warm like cloves, save me

i hate being ugly with no tits and ass

realizing none of my friends really like spending time with me

have noticed that none of my friends ever come to my shows

almost forgot i am an undesirable

no appetite

literally a canadian

for her own good and to protect her i will not talk with her again

silly love (daniel johnston)

i am sorry for deceiving and misleading you, i am a weapon

i just dont know. but im commited to the understanding that i am wrong and i should just give up all desire and just accept whatever happens.

going to bed, while i can still dream

greater understandings of your place in this world

i should be happy, but it feels so bad

silly love (daniel johnston)

we're going to comedy night together tomorrow and im yearning so much to be with her again, i am going to beg that she comes home only so i can hold and cuddle with her

found some bones in the woods

glowing lately. in love again.

doing well, drinking less, eating healthier, less soda. the other day did have a little relapse moment while manic and drank myself sick for 6 hours tried to stay conscious and sober up as to not have a deathly hang over. big pain. but ive only drank 4 times i think this month? pretty good honestly.

i had to screw a little basket hook into the ceiling to get my phone mic to hang like that, i hope the landlord will forgive it. it was for art.

someday the waves - iron and wine

going to the wine mom book club and handing out copies of 'what is to be done?'

there are no conservatives in my immediate life. every single person i associate with is some flavor of socialist. its amazing. the sooner you remove those people from your life the better.

in the past couple months ive probably gone to 2 dozen local shows and i gotta say the idea of paying more than 15$ to see people play music is insane to me. there are weird people with long hair at the local spot that can play just as good as the professionals and you can drink a beer with them too

not much to say lately, madly crushing on this woman, and desperate not to lose her, incredibly anxious that i have no reliable source of income. same as it ever was

my xbox controller is glitching and the right trigger keeps pressing itself, making it unusable :(

bro how tf do i make money

i cannot say what needs to happen to ICE agents but i can think it and im sure you can make a good assumption

fumble of the year already

my CRT just did something weird. the display and sound would work for 3 or 4 seconds before cutting off. i unplugged it, pressed the power button to discharge or whatever, and then plugged it in again. its working fine now. should i be concerned? or is this just something that happens ive never seen

i look so cool 🥰

youtu.be/-eJSW1Kci3M doing my song at the drag show

lots of cleaning lately. cant have friends over and have my house looking uncomfy

debts not real, im never paying that

first published in 2003...

they teach you shame so that you wont be deranged on the timeline. you should abandon that feeling.

had perogi w spinach feta and vodka sauce for dinner. delicious.

i think people overreact to the news of cold and snow. you knew it coming all year. why are you so panicked now? just get a blankey and some soup.

id say one of the most challenging things when performing live music is trying to adjust your playing to the sound of the room as to not overwhelm any of the other instruments. every room you play in will be different because of how the sound bounces around.

my friend and local photographer hayden has been recording shows and events on a vhs camera for a couple weeks now and its so funny and cool at the same time

brainstorming on a big list of songs my band would be able to pull out and cover on a whim. i think having a big backlog of stuff to do together would go a long way. being able to surprise a crowd with something unexpected is good fun.

joining linked in just to tell companies i'll kill my self if they don't hire me

i got to play one of my songs at the drag show today. very cool.