❤️

QOTD: If I called someone a Twatzi, who would you assume I was referring to?

I have a food fixation of cottage cheese with tomatoes and avocado lately, but it also gives me the icks almost every time I eat it. I don’t understand why my brain is so annoying

*ART*

Super Bowl bound!!! Go Hawks!!!!

That catch was so money omg

Still simmering in rage today, how’s everyone else doing?

Time to stay salty.

Alex Pretti was a colleague at the VA. We hired him to recruit for our trial. He became an ICU nurse- I lover working with him. He was a good kind person who lived to help and these fuckers executed him. White. Hot. Rage.

People need to learn to put content warnings on their videos.

Ive been blowing my nose like crazy for a few days and now I have a tiny pimple under my nostril and basically I think I should just croak rather than have to deal with this kind of torture.

Taylor Swift should call more men a bitch.

People making me make non work decisions, while I’m working, feels like fighting words

I have an ice pack and a heating pad on my body right now. A Memoir.

My lab puppy is great, as long as I do exactly what he wants to do, exactly when he wants to do it.

I’m so PNW that I bought a new sun lamp and it gave me a headache.

I’m gonna go to bed at 9pm tonight. Like 9pm Eastern.

Just told someone my spoons are rusted and they didn’t understand what I was referring to and man, how I envy them 😮‍💨

Everything sucks but I’m making French Onion Soup with homemade bread, so there’s that.

Dystopian Fiction becomes Dystopian Non Fiction.

On the phone with United by 7:15am on a Friday? What fresh Hell is this?

The show I’m watching just said “hey siri call Kathy” and my phone tried to call my old supervisor who just recently died and I still went into a total panic trying to hang up even though I know she’s passed. I guess my anxiety thought it was going to try to connect to great unknown or something?

I just had the best Cosmic Crisp Apple ever. Damn those apples are perfection 🤌🏼

👇🏼

Animal Crossing has become my whole personality and I’m not sorry.

People are lighting off Fireworks after the Hawks win. Seattle fans are crazy. (It’s me, I’m a Seattle fan)

Seriously, what the fuck?

Done deal.

To 2025 I say

Watching Anderson Cooper take shots of tequila is my favorite way to celebrate NYE since I’ve been sober.

My New Year’s resolution is to be an even bigger menace. Like a Mogwai being fed after midnight kind of menace.

You talk a lot of shit for someone who can’t be around loud chewers without having a melt down. (It me)

I talked like four people into watching Real Housewives of Salt Lake City from the very first episode and they loved every single second of it, from “You smell like hospital” to “gout dick sucker.”

Just checked and today is Monesriday, December 48th. Just thought I’d let yall know in case your days got away from you this last week too.

And why is the carpet all wet, TODD?

It’s real Monday-y up in this bitch today

Happy Yule and Winter Solstice! The dark days are on the way out!!! Woohooo!

I was told my last pfp of my eyeball was creepy so I changed it back 🙄

This amount of rain fall is excessive even by Washington standards.

I just realized I only have 15 days left until I have to explain what a deductible is 400 times a day.

Almost just died via muddy buddies and it would have been a good way to go

I’ve learned to really dislike my elevens. Not because of vanity or anything, but because it warns people of what’s coming.

I love when I get prior authorization for a Procedure with a specific diagnosis and they approve it, only to have claims deny for diagnosis not approved and want me to appeal it. MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

I’m in my “hitting block immediately if I hear you say listening to audiobooks isn’t reading” era.

Received an early release copy of this book with Book of the Month and just finished it. Highly recommend it, I really enjoyed it. I think it’s out 12/30. 📚

Weird question, for anyone not in the PNW, are you hearing about how bad the flooding has been here?

Watching a screening of a documentary “Counting Orca” and I’m five minutes in and already mumbled “I hate humans.”

Bathing my cats would be less painful than this meeting I’m in

The worst part of not having power or internet is that it’s so quiet everybody in a five block radius can hear my stomach making weird ass noises

I’m in hard pants and going to see my parents before 9am on a Saturday. What fresh hell is this?