I smell hot dogs Why aren't I eating hot dogs Where are you my beloved

Idk, maybe I want sad boobs

The main reason 10th Ave is having so many problems during the Broadway detour is that this is what it looks like at the best of times. It's just a normal car road with no actual protected bike space and the bare minimum of traffic calming, most of which takes the form of ignorable signs.

I didn't really know French before but I think with Duolingo's help, I know even less now

What's left is still beautiful, for now And we can always make it better

here come old laptop he come bootin up slowly he got broken touchpad he need one more update he got no space on this pc one thing i can tell you its got no warranty

that’s like a weeks worth of potato for free!

I found a jumping spider in my plants today so when I say you can't ruin my good day I mean it

ACAB includes Cloud

This is the only important thing I've ever posted I am not a crank

My first crow gift Just cause I'm trashy doesn't mean I'm a trash can, dammit I'm definitely a trash cannot

I don't wanna work five hours to pay for a dress or skirt I can already see through in the product picture, I am not the unreasonable one in this situation

A common thread among newer cyclists is realizing just how awful drivers are. There are things you simply don't notice — behavior that has been normalized — when you mostly drive. Biking, walking, or rolling through the world changes that.

I'm old enough now to go diving. If a sea monster eats me that's fine, I had a good run. Great story for the family.

Going through old memes, want anything?

I fucking love fluffy tree season

It's a weird world where I'm more sober than the FBI director but okay

PINK PETAL CLUB MY CITY IS COVERED IN THOSE PINK PETALS, BUB

I just need y'all to know post-its used to have 100 sheets, not 90.

I'm starting to yearn for the Demolition Man future where we are ruled by Taco Bell

Quit a job once because I realized I wasn't getting up early enough to be on time but I was already waking up mad (On the plus side when I sleep through my alarm now I'm still up before 10 which was definitely not a thing before)

Insert jokes about needing the D Insert vitamin reveal (I am in solid denial of how badly this impacts my life, every fucking winter)

🎵boss makes a dollar I make a dime That's why I stole all the bandaids from work*🎶 *I put a handful in the wrong pants, actually but that doesn't rhyme

it's actually the trolley problem's monster

I would like to take this opportunity to friend zone the world. I love all of you, just...not like that

I usually only say this to myself but Oh my god just die already

for every 20 likes, I will give Ed Baldwin more cheese on his spaghetti

I love space so damn much I'd go up there without a suit or a way back

To each their own or something but we should just keep putting benches up in everywhere we feel like cause the city will take forever to notice if we don't tell them

Minneapolis is just better than most places I dont know what to tell you.

If you'd like to follow along with the #Artemis II launch, NASA has a live blog here: www.nasa.gov/blogs/missio... and you can watch the official broadcast on the NASA site here: plus.nasa.gov/scheduled-vi... or on YouTube here: www.youtube.com/live/Tf_UjBM...

I'm not crying about the beauty of whales or anything *sniffle*

Every time I see that picture I think of this one

i asked a magic 8 ball if everything was going to be ok and it collapsed in on itself like a dying star is that good

🎵what the world needs now is another remix of Dragula🎶

I've been testing it out 'cause I'm a weirdo but crows are surprisingly responsive to "no, I'm going this way, excuse me"

Gods bless every human who lets me ramble about sci fi shit. I'd give you a spare organ if they weren't all crap*. *It's a joke but also, true.

The idea that bright, wild color is something you outgrow is a damaging lie society tells us. This unspoken rule, that enjoying intense, clashing colors makes you childish, is pure bullshit. The depression palette trend has only gotten worse because it saves corpos money. We gotta end it.

I'm pretty fucking stupid but even I'm not "AI will do it, and better!" kinda stupid

EVERYBODY BETRAYED ME! I FED UP WITH THIS SENATE! O hi, Brutus

I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news. The shipper... (takes off glasses, pinches bridge of nose) The shipper chose DHL. (unable to look you in the eye) We don't know when your package will arrive. We may never know.

the hardest part about separating the art from the artist is how i seem to have glued myself to this macaroni picture

It’s big ball chunky time

showing up to a pedicure like

"You may not like it but this is what peak performance looks like"

Exactly what happens every time I skip a car commercial

Yesterday I had a song stuck in my head that I actually enjoy I'm remarking on it because it's pretty remarkable for me (Like, today it's Mmmbop)