Isn’t it mad that Madonna has some of the best songs ever recorded, yet nowadays she’s truly WHACK

Spent most of the weekend stimming by yelling quotes from Norbit to myself. Been nice.

Our date evening - practicing some origami to hype ourselves for our Japan holiday in a few weeks

Date day today was going to the arcades at Southsea Pier. They’ve put this in the corner - as a kid I used to beg to activate it. Now, it simply haunts my dreams.

The 9th DB Valentine’s Day ❤️

Happy Valentines Day to all my baby daddies x

Hasn’t rained here today x

Posted without comment.

Really fancy eating a whole roast chicken and watching Allo Allo x

Most relatable thing he’s ever said.

Today has been one of those day where the cart got in front of the horse early on and I’ve finally got it under control x

Had Corned Beef hash for dinner and I’m aware the concept is disgusting but HECK it’s comforting x

Sneak peak: the end slide

Have made a PowerPoint for my friends about going skiing next year. Genuinely my proudest work.

Finished Only Murders in the Building tonight and honestly isn’t it lovely to have a show with five solid seasons

All the straight people I know asked ChatGPT to draw a picture of them ‘using all the information they know’ and were perfectly fine with the accuracy. Like, no pause for reflection to be freaked out?

The office ‘shout down the phoner’ is in and has started already

Perfect

Reminder that there are so many songs about love sex and heartbreak but there is only one song about The Boys being back in town.

Today I weigh under 13 stone for the first time in 8 years. I am Vogue, Vogue is me x

I didn’t watch The Super Bowl because it’s in the middle of the night and very dull x

This weekend I have only left the house to go to my driveway and clean my car. Otherwise I’ve been sofa rotting. Next weekend I WILL be more productive. Finished my book though x

Day 2 of house pottering. Might expand to the garden x

When did everyone insist on using collagen powder I swear a balanced diet is the bare minimum nowadays

I’ve whacked on Titanic. Anyone know what it’s about?

I regretted buying this book at first as it’s 835 pages, but it’s actually been pretty darn good

Officially ‘pottering’ around the house this weekend

The vision is complete x

Skipping Parkrun today as I’m sick of the rain and want no part in it 😤😤

Re-pierced the second hole today (I have a vision). It bled a lot x

Got turned away from giving blood today for being too precious** **having low iron levels

She’s had her hair cut, FINALLY x

Re-pierced my ear on a work call x

Man I love crisps

Why do I always like my hair the best two days before a haircut? (Bit messy bc of sex hair - on a Tuesday no less!!)

Another day of teams calls tomorrow x

Horrendous drive home from work so having a tacky-lie down for 5 mins as a treat x

My colleague has managed to swing a deal where whenever she has a meeting she attends (not even hosts or contributes to) she can do so from home ‘in case the office is loud’ My boomer take: absolutely not, it’s your office day - come in.

Raining again.

Spicy tuna in a wholemeal pitta truly is the GOAT of quick lunches

Lost 2.5lbs this week and feeling cunty.

What’s fascinating about Trump and Musk is that they peddled a conspiracy for years about draining swamps and satanist cabals / trafficking rings to smear their adversaries, when they were firmly in the Venn diagram of one. Are they that arrogant that they thought nothing would ever come of it?

Just finished Season 4 of The Bear. Pretty sure absolutely nothing happened?

Sick to DEATH of the rain 😤

Can’t believe it’s not January?

Don’t want to show off, but I renewed my Go Outdoors membership today 💅

What’s with all these nonces emailing one another about everything?

‘Mary and Henry did their courting here circa 1947’ x

Pretty good mud line from my run today.

My local cinema is showing the Melania film 3 times today? These people should all go for a coffee together (if they aren’t going to watch ironically).