To be fair, they've only had *checks notes* SEVEN YEARS since being awarded the bid for the Olympics.

I've had this in my head the past few days, so I thought I'd toss it into the timeline for you. It won't make everything better, but it will make you feel better for a few minutes at least. (The entire album is a gem btw, and you should definitely seek it out.) www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpdT...

Facebook keeps suggesting the worst-looking baking reels in my feed and I'm both fascinated and horrified. Just saw a lady make a loaf cake with snack cakes in it, but she cut it RIGHT OUT OF THE OVEN (like still steaming) and it just fell apart on the plate as she did a *tada* hand with no irony.

The extreme urge to order a dozen bagels and dissappear into a blanket fort with the bag.

Just scream-sang my way through Basket Case in the car. Highly recommend a therapeutic dose of Green Day. Car optional, screaming mandatory.

My brain giving me a little pep talk in the morning like

Maybe it's because I'm hanging on by a thread today, but this made me laugh so hard when I opened my email that I nearly spit coffee on the screen.

As a timeline cleanse, please enjoy this tiny painting I made a few years ago while watching the Final Justice episode of MST3K. 🎶 I bet you knew-sio It's me-sio, your friend Goosio Goosio, Goosio, Goosio! Everyone loves Goosio! Gather 'round children and hear my song I'm Goosio, Goosio, Goosio! 🎶

Mothra Dearest

I'm at that point of prolonged unemployment where the madness has reached just the right level to make me want to learn this choreography. www.youtube.com/watch?v=98XR...

While I'm ultimately looking to find a full time job, I just found out today that I need a new roof, so literally no project is too small to throw my way. I can help with writing, editing, branding, website content reviews, social media posts, blog posts, etc. 100% human creativity, guaranteed.

Read for filth by a banner ad

Going to start replying, "I AM HORSE VET" whenever I get exasperated.

Every time we watch @rifftrax.com BLOOD ON HER HANDS, one of us yells "Danish!" when our favorite character appears. That character being, of course, the cheese pastry that the detective yearns for the whole film and finally gets to enjoy at the end. It's as big as a frisbee and it is glorious.

The struggle is real

Ripping apart the last of the panettone with my bare hands and shoving it into my mouth, maintaining direct eye contact the entire time.

Big mood.

The banner ads are feeling frisky.

The box photo didn't prepare me for just how adorably mini these crackers would be.

My brain, giving me a little pep talk each morning:

What it feels like opening up my timeline each morning to check if any fresh horrors were unleashed while I was sleeping.

If not slop, why slop shaped?

The banner ads are feeling frisky.

While I'm ultimately looking to find a full time job, I just found out today that I need a new roof, so literally no project is too small to throw my way. I can help with writing, editing, branding, website content reviews, social media posts, blog posts, etc. 100% human creativity, guaranteed.

2026 starting off with strong 2025 energy by literally blowing the roof off my house.

I've seen a lot of ads over the years that use wildly inappropriate music, but this new Dunkin' ad misunderstands the message of "Little Boxes" by such a wide margin it's jaw-dropping. How the hell did this make it out into the world? www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCEF...

When you realize you put Cool Whip in the fridge to defrost over a week ago and then never used it, the only responsible thing to do is eat an obscene amount of it directly from the container before it goes bad.

So we're all agreed that CARNIVAL OF SOULS was definitely a conscious remake of TWILIGHT ZONE's "The Hitch-Hiker" episode, right? Inger Stevens drove so Candace Hilligoss could...well, drive too?

Anyone else's streaming ads suddenly get really weird on January 1st? I'm getting pummeled with ads for random Amazon products with no clear rhyme or reason. Just this past ad break I got: Heat lamp for chickens Decorative map wall art Comically huge canister of oxygen you huff

It's now been a full year since my entire team was laid off in a pivot to AI slop/outsourcing. So, I'm starting out 2026 reintroducing myself! I have 20+ years experience as a copywriter, marketer, editor, and manager. If your team is looking to hire for a creative position, I'd love to chat!

The vibe I'm bringing into 2026

PSA for those who enjoy watching the #TwilightZoneMarathon but aren't in the mood for the Season 4 hourlong episodes currently airing on SyFy. There's a dedicated Twilight Zone channel on @pluto.tv and it's on a run of great episodes right now. pluto.tv/us/live-tv/6...

This feels about right. 🥔

Every year @doctorofthedead.bsky.social picks a Marx Brothers movie for us to watch on New Year's Eve. Tonight his selection is A NIGHT AT THE OPERA! Whatever your plans tonight, I hope you have a Happy New Year, filled with as much joy as you can cram into it. 💗

We did it! 31 days, 31 @rifftrax.com movies we'd never seen before! And there are still plenty left to discover. You can find quick reviews of every film in the thread below. I think the top three to add to our regular rotation would be: 🦸‍♂️ THE FANTASTIC ARGOMAN 🐢 BOG 🧠 THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS

If the experience of living through 2025 was a dog.

It's difficult to choose just one! In terms of personal impact, Björk's video for Human Behaviour (directed by Michel Gondry) was an essential building block in developing my weird brain. I would obsessively watch MTV every day waiting for it to come on again. www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0mR...

Shout out to anyone managing sobriety in 2025, you're doing great! Here's Betty Crocker's Punch for Big Affairs, to help celebrate a sober New Year's Eve. In Betty's own words, "Sounds odd, but is unusually delicious." The recipe makes 75 servings, so be sure you have a comically huge bowl.

I am once again begging game developers to consider the accessibility issues of designing your puzzle game to be played first-person POV. Every year I read the "best of" lists looking for fun games I missed and every year I get sad that I can't play them because they'll give me the dizzies.

Hey, no fair why does Jerry get to live *my* dream?

It wouldn't be a celebration without an unhinged Jell-O appetizer! Spend New Year's Eve explaining to your party guests why it made sense to suspend the deli tray in lemon gelatin instead of just letting them eat it with crackers. And yes, the recipe can be doubled for twice the regret.

Yesterday I posted a photo of my lunch, which for reasons unclear to me hit the Discover feed at night, and has led to people continuing to tell me for the past 12 hours that I should eat the piece of pizza for breakfast today that I already ate for lunch yesterday. The magic of Bluesky, I guess. 😅

Want to welcome 2026 in classic style? Grab literally any food from your fridge and poke it into a cabbage. Nothing shows the guests at your New Year's Eve party that you care quite like random cubes of food jammed into other foods.

We're almost on schedule for our holiday episode of GHOULS IN THE HOUSE, so let's call that a win in 2025. We examine the horrors of capitalism as two retail teams take on some unknown terrors. Listen on the ATB website or your favorite podcast app! www.atbpublishing.com/2025/12/29/e...

It would appear that Cindy had a religious experience with these instant noodles.

I've been thinking about having this leftover palak paneer pizza for lunch since I woke up this morning. 😍

You should definitely be reading this webcomic! (And I'm not just saying that because I live with the creator.)

It should not require this many different lotions to spackle together my body every day.

This Baltimore Beat section aims to help the community with resources and support they may not know are available. baltimorebeat.com/community-re...