Disregard April Fools, I'm fucking stupid all year

According to Reader's Digest, Missouri is the most forgotten US state. which is pretty normal out here. I forget that I live here too. www.rd.com/article/most...

So some of you guys wanted some Rue "baht stuff," so here's Rue eating at a Thai restaurant called Baht Stuff. ... Oh you wanted Rue doing "butt stuff." Huh. Happy April Fool's Day \o/

*takes a drag of my cigarette, downs a beer* I was a prom king... now I'm a prom Kinger

Gonna be enjoying some boners, uncensored 😉😜

"when my powerball numbers come up" is shorthand for saying you're too poor for things.

balancing out my weekday emotional imbalance with weekend chemical imbalance.

and for somewhere underground hoofingtonrises.bandcamp.com/album/music-...

Epidemiologists Confirm First Airborne Transmission Of Mar-A-Lago Face

Leaf That Came Out Too Early Cold As Shit

yes, I did buy the furry ad meme drink

I have discovered my town’s ethnic foods market. It’s over for me bros

how do I relate to someone who wasn't alive when 9/11 happened?

Europeans are so funny. they act high and mighty for not having chattel slavery but will have Swedish musicians who pretend to be Indians from India.

Peaches

me back on my bullshit

decent ep

pinkie pie would be on the 6-7 train I just know it.

15 minutes oil changes always seem to last an hour or so

What a neat find

Give Ireland back to the Irish!

Happy St. Patrick’s Day

American songs: I Love California Girls British songs: I Love American Girls Australian songs: DO YOU COME FROM A LAND DOWN UNDER? WHERE WOMEN GLOW AND MEN PLUNDER?

Catholic in Name Only (CINO)

there were elk and bison, a gnu or two giraffes and elephants, quite a few

this is my attempt at something like this en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parapro...

I’m a middle of the road kind of person. I’ve caused 20 cars to swerve.

damn splinter

trying to diet

My coworkers called me an NPC 😥

Markets In Turmoil As Price Of Money Skyrockets To $90 A Dollar http://theonion.com/markets-in-turmoil-as-price-of-money-skyrockets-to-90-1819575197/

the Cheese Caves...

I get it. We live in a world where the YT algorithm is insane & AI bots are powering our comments, but it doesn't mean I don't get excited at the prospect that there are 8 more folks out there to push me to 2300. It's a clean number www.youtube.com/c/IAmRhymeFlow tell your friends!

randomly remembering seeing @dnotive.bsky.social at a con playing a depeche mode song while high as fuck.

Born too late for war in the Middle East. Born too early for war in the Middle East. Born in time for war in the Middle East

This War Will Destabilize The Entire Mideast Region And Set Off A Global Shockwave Of Anti-Americanism vs. No It Won’t

me ending up in heaven bc I watched a veggietales vhs in 2nd grade: "no it's fine, I just didn't think it'd be veggies, is all"

Hey you guys