andresito, M.S.
@andreskibbities.bsky.social
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once I figure out how to have insurance it’s cooked for these hoes 🙂↕️ 26
Me for the last 8 years:
add a skeleton here at some point
2 days ago
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Feel like punching my man in the stomach bc he bothered me today telling me he’d only be gone for one day but is staying the night (repeat issue) Posting this picture of us in our thanksgiving sweatshirts that I made for us as a fun crafty project instead Author’s Note: violence is bad, don’t hit
6 days ago
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Pupdate: I’ve been pinned under him for over an hour and I’m going to piss my legs bc he laid down so nicely and was being so well behaved but he NEVER does that and in this house we reward good behavior 😮💨
7 days ago
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feeling like a slutty little hallmark extra in this outfit today
9 days ago
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my baby son is getting neutered today and I’m feeling a lot of guilt about it bc i feel like if I woke up without balls I’d also have a lot of strong feelings about it :// here’s his grad photo tho Readers added Context: my baby son is a puppy dog and not a human if that was unclear
10 days ago
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OMG maybe I’m late to this but we have drafts now??? That’s cunt 🤩
10 days ago
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stills from my marginally successful impromptu shopping trip today note: the sierra dressing room did see a lot more of me, inquire within ;)
12 days ago
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The search begins for:
12 days ago
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Bedroom humidifier don’t sound like my baby dog throwing up at 5a when my baby dog threw up at 4:30a challenge 👀😮💨
20 days ago
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LUV this for you, I’ve actually decided that I’m extra mad at people that I used to be mad at, resulting in grudges and hostility 🙂↕️💙 range is everything to me
add a skeleton here at some point
20 days ago
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About to be the sexiest man alive (inquired about a planet fitness membership) 🙂↕️💙
20 days ago
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Throwing out every single thing I own in the next 30 days so if you’re interested in possessions lmk!!
22 days ago
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Needing to wash my hair just made me miss out on a sexy man coming to my apartment… brb shaving my head and also wishing I was never born
about 1 month ago
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THIS.
add a skeleton here at some point
about 1 month ago
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This is my DREAM 😭
add a skeleton here at some point
about 2 months ago
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I have a complex relationship with the Following tab here bc all my favorite girlies are there (win) but girlies are real people who don’t post all the time bc they live lives (win) but then sometimes I see all of the most recent posts and I get repeat posts (L). Maybe I need a life to live 🥴
2 months ago
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Need an invite to a gay Halloween party so that I can be Michelangelo’s David and just be naked on display 😮💨
2 months ago
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reposted by
andresito, M.S.
✨presto-ho-ho✨
2 months ago
if he wants to fuck tonight he is gonna have to ride it because i am the sleepiest guy™ ✨😴✨
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Being a puppy parent is being more viciously ill than you have in a long time and understanding that your baby dog is with 1000% certainty will repeatedly climb onto you just to jump as hard as he can off of your stomach when all you want is rest…
2 months ago
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Direct quote from my man today: “How do I make buttered noodles? Do I just add butter to noodles??” 🤠
2 months ago
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My Caucasian partner (love him dearly) asked me if I would like Pizza Hut for dinner today and I said yes before taking a nap. I woke up to a “food truck tamale pie” for dinner god is dead, an act of war has been committed. I don’t know what I did to deserve this 😪
3 months ago
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Dismantling the relationship between being the most competent and capable person in my office and taking on the most work and responsibility in my office 🤭 my impact was felt for a full year and I pinky swear yall will never feel it again ✨
3 months ago
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reposted by
andresito, M.S.
Squall
3 months ago
Not arguing with an uncut man, whatever you say Chinese finger trap
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just found some nudes that I took a long time ago, specifically on January 6th of 2021 😋 clearly I had much more important things happening on that day than some others
3 months ago
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Where do yall buy your slutty business casual?? Tryna up my game this year as the hottest bitch in the office since I will not be working at my job anymore 🤭
4 months ago
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Pupdate: gratitude is very much lost on this one, who decided to completely unravel my yarn ball and is now refusing to release the string
4 months ago
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I made not one but TWO dog toys for my baby today and he really enjoys both of them and that feels like a major slay for me 🤭💙
#dogdad
#dogsky
4 months ago
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sometimes I really think about the fact that 2020 hit and I could’ve been naked on the internet and made so much money but instead I chose to work in a field where I am always working with ungrateful idiots and I get paid like ass 🥲
4 months ago
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Fatherhood has continuously left me in disarray 🫠
5 months ago
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H8 to be the bad news bear, but I stretched this morning for like 30-40 minutes… My ascension begins
5 months ago
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also I freakin sewed a pair of shorts as a gift for my sister’s birthday this week and when I finished them they looked like shorts and the threads weren’t hanging out and they generally looked pretty nice (despite being tossed together)??? anyway I think that was really sexy of me 🤭💙
5 months ago
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reposted by
andresito, M.S.
hayden
5 months ago
Brennan Lee mulligan is my miss Rachel
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Yall I stretched for the first time in actual years a few days ago and I think I accidentally released huge amounts of pent up stress anger and frustration that I was holding in my hamstrings?? And like that’s kind of a slay in theory but in practice I have been such a terror to be around 👹🤠
5 months ago
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new baby flicks just dropped 🔥💥
#dog
#dogdaddy
5 months ago
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i choose to believe that my lil skeets have range af bc even tho i average at about 1 like per post, it’s always a new person liking it 🙂↕️💙😹
5 months ago
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lover thought he was big brained because he got our pizza boxes to fit in the fridge last night … woke up this morning to find that the fridge door popped open bc of aforementioned boxes and now nothing in our fridge is cold 🫠
#livingwithamanisacurse
5 months ago
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I’ve started saying/signing “clock it, lock it, put it in your pocket” when someone says something even minutely pleasing to me and that makes life 50x more enjoyable
5 months ago
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someone FaceTime me for accountability so I can operate at normal human capacity and accomplish literally anything
#adhd
#gaydhd
5 months ago
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sometimes I wish I suffered more from the gay community pressure to be ripped and fit bc I would love to be a gym girlie but I have no external motivation to do so bc I think I’m one of the hottest men I’ve ever seen in real life 🤧 self assurance ain’t all it’s cracked up to be :/
5 months ago
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this should be studied
add a skeleton here at some point
5 months ago
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just discovered I can wear this pet car seat as a backpack ao me and the pooch are about to be exploring the whole world
5 months ago
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“used to” is the most heartbreaking part of this post 😪🫠
add a skeleton here at some point
5 months ago
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I would like my working hours to be 1p-5p Monday through Thursday who has a job for me ?? I have a lot of skills but I would really like to not use any of them and be paid $50/hr. Thanks so much for hiring me 🙂↕️💙🫠
5 months ago
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this SERIOUSLY would improve my mental health
add a skeleton here at some point
6 months ago
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Off to Columbo!! The travel bun is slaying down rn so I think it’s gonna be a good trip but presenting at this conference has me trembling 🫠
6 months ago
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Off to Columbo!! The travel bun is slaying down rn so I think it’s gonna be a good trip but presenting at this conference has me trembling 🫠
6 months ago
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Today every single person at my place of employment wanted me to tweak
6 months ago
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If a future iteration of Zootopia comes out and they need another music celebrity animal, I humbly offer: Benson Bone. Please don’t clap 🤭💙
6 months ago
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Today I had several irritatingly pointless conversations and the rain that I was forced to walk through soaked through two pairs of shoes, two pairs of socks, and two pairs of pants. This also occurred only in the afternoon of my day so we are not slaying the day 🫠
6 months ago
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damn I thought of a hit skeet while I was out with my dog this morning and by the time I made it back inside it was so far gone this is terrible news
6 months ago
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