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Not my child trying to convince me that “buttcrack” was on her spelling test

@tricialockwood.bsky.social signed my padre pio card and it makes me laugh and I’m also deeply moved, which is very much what it’s like to read her work. What a night @thankyoubooks.bsky.social

Pink pony club on a loop in my head except it’s going “dick’s sporting goods,” someone pls help

I take it back I like the Chicago pope

An American pope. Like I’m flattered but are y’all sure

Your best American pope is this anything

The microplastics in me accept and honor the microplastics in you

Just learned my 7 yo’s word for “golf course” is “putt putt field”

oh thank god

Last night I dreamed my six year old was smoking a cigarette and I was like okaaay but just one

lmao someone just drove down my street absolutely blasting Jack Johnson

Can’t/won’t stop wearing author hats

[playing restaurant with 5yo] Me: This tea is delicious, what’s in it? 5yo: Oh, just meat!