The human experiment has failed. *Headbutts the world in half* *Dies*

My advice? Don't.

"This is an important dinner, people. It's all or nothing here." "Don't you mean OWL or nothing?" "Please. This is so very important to our futures, PLEASE don't do anything." I stare for a moment. My face twitches as my facade cracks. "I'm so sorry" I whisper I have already released the owls

Heh, not me *Explodes*

"Can't let you do that, fuckface!" *Drives into you*

Today, my video game music radio show Nitro Game Injection finally RETURNS! It'll the 580th episode, but don't worry; you don't need to binge the other 579 to understand what's going on, I promise. All you need to know is, bangin' tunes for 2 hours starting at 3 PM US Eastern! How to listen: (1/2)

Power that's so strong or wild that it makes your body crack open is a cool aesthetic. Just putting that out there.

Tepid

Boy I sure would love that super power that every fucking person but me apparently has where they can just go to sleep whenever.

*I approach the lectern and adjust the microphone* If you ever enjoyed something then FUCK YOU! *I am immediately accosted by officers and agents of multiple agencies. My past has caught up to me. I am at peace.* *No one survives*

Chrono Trigger

Nothing says crime spree like the Honey B's Hive theme from Banjo-Tooie

The crime is enjoy thing! The sentence is not be alive!

Video Games

I don't want to rest in peace. I want to come back and GET YOU!

30 years ago today, Principal Skinner purchased fast food to disguise as his own cooking at an unforgettable luncheon with Superintendent Chalmers. #TheSimpsons episode “22 Short Films About Springfield” first aired April 14, 1996.

Eggs are like nature's gacha capsules.

As we enter the final 10 days, Arisan needs your help now more than ever! It's a comic kickstarter, but what is Arisan ABOUT? This thread will tell you! 🧵

I don't want to be part of the problem. I want to be an entirely new problem!

What if they were called Pecants? What if they tasted like despondency?

#Arisan update! The comic kickstarter will be ending April 10th. While that's not a ton of time, we can still make it. If you want to support us bringing this action/fantasy story to life, please help by backing us on Kickstarter & sharing. Link: www.kickstarter.com/projects/526...

We're working on a couple more promotion videos as well in the background, including one with animation from an industry pro. The team and myself really are putting our all into Arisan. Please, help us reach more people so we can tell this story. Link: www.kickstarter.com/projects/526...

What about a battle series but it's about, like, paying taxes? What if one of the heroes shouts "DEDUCTION!" and punches a taxman through a wall? I dunno, just spit balling here.

30 years ago today, we first met Chester J. Lampwick, although it wasn’t the first time Grampa Simpson or Krusty the Clown met him. #TheSimpsons episode “The Day the Violence Died” first aired March 17, 1996.

*I stumble into the pitch meeting, heavily inebriated as I run from my personal demons* "W-what if we did a cat girl who whispers Nyaaa~ into folks butts? What if we did that?" *I black out and collapse. I don't work at this company. However, the idea becomes a hit and I am not credited.*

I could say it's my birthday and people would just believe me

I think it's kinda cute when people make their Jeep look angry

Morning #Arisan update! My hope is us reaching TEN new people today who can support the campaign. If you know someone who loves comics or independant art, please take time to share the link with them directly. Also, made a little profile update! Campaign Link: www.kickstarter.com/projects/526...

I wonder what Yoshi tastes like

#Arisan Wave 1's Variant Artists! It may be the last day of Black History Month, but black creators will always matter. Among them I love and respect are @jongraywb.blacksky.app , @geohen17.bsky.social , @droseattack.bsky.social, and @nonitheartist.bsky.social who're part of our stretch goals! 1/?

I don't want to be celebrated for being born. I want to be celebrated for something cool, like kicking someone in half. I dunno.

"Say some gangsta is dissin' your fly girl. Ya just give' em one of these."

ARISAN KICKSTARTER IS NOW LIVE! Motion Comic Teaser Trailer here! Please support and share the campaign: www.kickstarter.com/projects/526...

Yoooooo, I'm just some fuckin' guy!

Me: It has begun Them: What? *I explode into a fine mist of blood and viscera* *The birthday party has been ruined*

You fuckin' know it, lady

What if Narwhals were called Nardwhals and instead of horns they had, like, balls

I don't know what ChuChu Rocket is about but what if it was called PuPu Rocket? Is that something? I dunno.

Hey there, stinky

I don't wanna do stuff

20 years of freelancing for licensed IPs has been grand, but there comes a time when I want to make something I can call "mine." Where I set the rules, vision & direction. THAT is #Drogune: Fortune's Lap. A chance to create for creation's sake. Give it a look, won't you? Drogune.com/Read

Try to RP with your boss. Just to see what happens.

*I approach the microphone and gently tap it a few times* "That's fuckin' stupid." I say *The crowd goes apeshit in a frothing frenzy of competing emotions*

I don't need no doctors to tell me when something's wrong! *I show a patch of dry skin to my dog* Whaddya think, girl? Give it the ol' sniff test.