Every Xmas my husband+RDs toss shit-grenades over Epstein Island (Little St. James to colonizers). Indigenous people were the Taino, Kalinago, and Ciboney- massacred by slave trade . ÎlesDeRapists rightfully belongs to Virgin Islanders. THE THREE QUEENS OF FIREBURN @realhistoricalfact.bsky.social

Nice List 2026. People who act on this👇🏻

I made this my mother’s ringtone on my phone for decades. Then one day, I saw Glenn Danzig at House of Pies in LA. His nails were claws and I was like oh shit dude’s legit. Just because I married Santa does’t mean I’m not hilarious, or that my mom likes me.

I stepped out to see Joe Jackson 20yrs ago. What I saw were a lot of men with thin, grey ponytails.

@imdanlevy.bsky.social I still think about if you found your car in that parking garage last year. My husband said a car wouldn’t fit in a chimney. I hadn’t even told him what kind to get. He can be such an asshole.

Two more months until my husband takes his annual surfing trip. God love him, but a girl needs some quiet time to sit back, smoke weed, eat my own godamned cookies, and look up at the sky. #SurfsUp

Christmas felt different this year. The magic of the season was drowned out by the noise from a cast of bad actors without a shred of compassion or decency. In the end, Good defeats evil. Stay the course. Seek peace and be kind. Love each other. Christmas will be back. I believe in you. 🎅🏻

My husband put me on the naughty list and I’m really not in the mood.

My husband knows when I am sleeping, and when I am awake. He knows when I’ve been bad or good, so I’m subservient for goodness sake. I better watch out. I better not cry.

Do you have any idea what it’s like to have everyone carolling about your husband’s affair every year? How am I supposed to heal.

EGGcited for tomorrow?! I hope it lives up to your EGGspectations. #Easter #Eggs #EasterEggs #EasterBunny #Chocolate #ChocolateEggs #Jesus #ChocolateJesus #ChocolateResurrection #CarobEggsAreStupid #ChocolateOurLord #ChocolatePrayer #ChocolateMass #ChocolateOurFather #ChocolateCrucifixion

Chocolate-garden chic! Wear the brown and pink Rodarte- soft glam with a hop.

Do you know how eggspensive Easter is going to be for me this year?

I’m I still allowed to come work in America this Easter, or do y’all hate chocolate Jesus now too.

WTF is up with dudes?

@imthetoothfairy.bsky.social Your necklace is siiiiick.

Do people still say “you go girl”

Every person deserves access to medical care — no exceptions. #WordlDayofSocialJustice

@jesus.bsky.social ‘member how boring your birthday used to be before my husband came along?! You’re welcome, baby jeez!

Kinda bummed-out my husband didn’t get any Thank You cards.