Comedian pals. Looking for recommendations of venues in Cardiff for tour. 50-100 seaters. And anywhere else in Wales actually. Cheers

Copmanthorpe and Horbury last night. Amsterdam tonight. Some game this.

Needs to be acknowledged how much Britain have nailed the plug. 3 robust prongs, solid, reliable. Not this half hearted two prong shite the Europeans favour. Or whatever the fuck that weak, thin pish the Americans go for.

Sometimes this job is lovely

You okay babe? You’ve hardly touched your sheep’s lungs, heart and liver encased in an animal’s intestinal sack.

Burns night. When Scottish folk pretend to like poetry as an excuse to get pissed.

Having been stuck in a house all day with children because of this storm I am now more climate conscious than I have ever been. We must never let this happen again.

“Right lads, let’s just keep it cool for the first couple of hours. Don’t do anything to attract attention”

When your husband is getting inaugurated at 5 but you have to kill Roger Rabbit at 6.

Back on the road opening for The King Troy Hawke tonight in Dublin.

First weekend back working in 2025. 10 gigs. 2 podcasts. Manchester, Belfast, Dublin. 3 of the greats.

Friday night in Manchester!

Christmas, Nightingale, Nelson Some team for lunch

Probably just sit this one out Booky Wook

Just been down to Scotland’s new drugs consumption room. Turns out poppers isn’t what they mean.

Peter will still get to see the campervan every second weekend

Leon’s poker face in The Traitors trying to pretend he hasn’t been given a Life card.

I see someone has been leaving Lynx around the Highlands. I mean we’ve all be disappointed by it as a Christmas present but come on.

Quick cinema question. Will I understand Nosfera 2 if I haven’t seen the first one?

Hope Diddy doesn’t have a house in LA. All that oil, the thing will go up like a blue light.

If you are sick of your relatives my special is repeated on BBC Scotland tonight at 22.30.

Been watching that Mr Beast show. Philip Schofield : Cast Away, I think it was called.

Bloody Mary poured, Sinatra and Dino on the tunes, It’s A Wonderful Life next. I love this night so much. Merry Christmas to every single one of you. And remember, no man is a failure who has friends.

Thanks so much to everyone who’s said lovely things about the TV special. I don’t have an agent or team of writers behind me. It’s all me working my arse off so I hugely appreciate the support. My favourite day of the year is Christmas Eve & I’m on the homepage of IPlayer.

Anyone with any sense, tune in tonight to watch one of, if not the, best standups going. He's also just a great guy, so show support @marknelsoncomic.bsky.social Mark Nelson Live from Dumfries: www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0026gr4 via @bbciplayer

One of my favourite comedians this lad. Not only that but he’s an absolute gent too. Give this a watch tonight 👌

Mental sentence to write but my special is on TV in less than an hour. Mark Nelson : Live From Dumfries 22.15 BBC Scotland and IPlayer

My first ever televised special will be on BBC Scotland this Sunday at 22.15 Then on iPlayer after that. I am amazed some of this made it past cuts.

Liverpool fans need to behave themselves when it comes to criticising Andy Robertson.

All the way through growing up I used to buy this and circle everything I wanted to watch and tape. Now I am in it. I love Christmas so the idea that my own stand up show is part of the Xmas schedule is incredible. Genuine dream come true. 22nd December. 10.15pm.

Our annual day when I get to live out my fantasy of being Clark W Griswold

Been thinking about first Xmas gigs I ever did. Glee Club Cardiff. Line up was me, Tom Wrigglesworth, Tom Stade and Elis James. Mesmerised by how masterful Tom was compering, how effortlessly cool Stade was onstage and can still remember all of Elis’ Last Christmas routine.

Alternative Old Christmas Cracker Jokes Day 3

First Christmas gig of the season tonight. You don’t understand. I ain’t scared of you motherfuckers.

Top 5 Christmas songs 1. Jingle Bell Rock - Bobby Helms 2. Merry Christmas Everyone - Shakin’ Stevens 3. Fairytale of New York - The Pogues 4. Let It Snow - Dean Martin 5. Last Christmas - Wham Let’s hear yours

On my way to one of my favourite places in the world, Brighton. Gonna be at The Komedia all weekend.

Ah my Spotify Wrapped. The time of year where Taylor Swift and Ariana Grande casually mingle with Pantera and Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci.

Alternative Old Christmas Cracker Jokes Day 2

Alternative Old Christmas Cracker Jokes Day 1

Godspeed to all parents trying to think up another 24 things for that fucking Elf to do

TOUR ONSALE NOW For tickets go to linktr.ee/marknelsoncomic These are just the first batch. Plenty more places to come. If you would like me to bring the tour anywhere please let me know in the comments.

Great night at the Scottish Refugee Council comedy benefit,brilliantly hosted by @marknelsoncomic.bsky.social and topped by the fab @susiemccabecomedy.bsky.social Proud to live in such a welcoming country #noborders

Mental to think that Gregg Wallace now has even more hours to neglect his disabled son

Can’t believe Gregg Wallace has turned out to be a horrible wanker. Always the ones you least suspect.

The Fringe show that has been delighting non-London comes to London! sohotheatre.com/events/pierr...

First batch of dates are onsale end of this week including all the big theatre shows in Glasgow, Aberdeen, Inverness and of course Dumfries.

Advice please Anyone who uses a mailing list, what’s the best site to use you have found? Cheers

Only 4 days til we bring back this desperate attempt for engagement

Wee sneak peek of what 12 people in Glasgow are getting treated to tonight