Come see me perform as a man at a local coffee shop near you!

If you order weights online and get them delivered. FUCK YOU

I met a dog named Lucas today. I love dogs with human names.

At a straight comedy club, damn, shits awkward.

Out here living my life with the confidence of a man with much longer hair.

Just saw weapons. Movie is easily a 9/10.

Create a British speak easy, call it 'innit'

What's the modern version of Tea? We need to throw that shit into the Boston harbor stat!

Men would rather say "anyhoo" than go to therapy

I've been outside in Dallas for 15 minutes and I'm already drenched in sweat. I'm not built for this climate.

Decided to go for a long ass walk today. It starts raining as soon as I'm 1.5 hours away from my house, lol.

Sitting under the TV at the doctor's office so I can glare at everyone that looks my way.

How about this weather, huh? youtu.be/e8j2ipFkvlI?...

Just put my 2 week notice in. No job lined up. God help us all.

Why don't companies ever reply to job applications? I've submitted around 50 this week. 🦗 🦗 🦗

Anyone else feel modern art lacks in experimentation and self expression? Is this due to making things based on an algorithm? Or is it that inspo has become overly homogeneous where everyone has the same inspo?

I'm tired of working and spending 8 hours in a cubicle. I am slowly understanding the appeal of homesteading.

Medium Build sings like he's gooning. youtu.be/aGqzaGKzZmk?...

I made a Cyanotype print for my place and I dig it! Now I just need to learn how to stretch the canvas.

Would it be financially feasible to quit my job and RP as a raccoon on TikTok? Looking into ideas for a major career pivot.

If anyone has any leads to a graphic design/marketing coordinator position please let me know. Looking to quit my job.

Why interact with Harry Potter when you can read MY webcomic with a bespectacled wizard that is infinitely less transphobic?

This song gives Frutiger Aero vibes if you think about it. youtu.be/BRBC9-uYFuc?...

How can you experience Twink death if you've never Twink lived?

Happy Friday! youtu.be/9ANzhPJZ2U0?...

Gas station cashiers are better than grocery store cashiers.

If you haven't watched "Common Side Effects" yet you are doing yourself a disservice. Show is a 10/10.

Hot, straight guy I hung out with once liked my insta story. So like, what are we?

Would the F-slur in a black metal font be a cool T-shirt design? Or am I just in a weird/unhealthy echo chamber?

Stopping at Pizza Hut, and the dude at the counter is stoned out his gourd. You just know this za gonna hit good.

Weekend here yet? youtu.be/qTLsfZk-FpE?...

First Luigi, now Pikachu. Nintendo is becoming the face of revolution.

Friday vibes youtu.be/FQUFBkYmc6U?...

Do blind people have favorite outfits?

Starting an MLM where the product is courses on how not to be caught in an MLM

Weighing the Pros & Cons of Ozempic vs. Meth.

Working on some graphics for a wedding. They didn't pick this design but I'm kind of obsessed with these squirrels.

Pro tip, if you listen to jazz while you drive, you can make yourself believe that the weird sound you hear is someone riffing in the song and not your deteriorating vehicle.

This is what Valhalla looks like to me

"The government is being taken over what should we do?" "I know, let's do the political version of a *Flash Mob*" Dems lookin' like an episode of Glee. FUCKIN' DO SOMETHING!

Bull Market this, Bear Market that. Who put furries in charge of the stock market?

You can tell Social Security checks cashed today, because I was almost run over by 4 different elderly people at the grocery store.

Reading a manga about a person getting sucked into a fantasy world and helping out their new surroundings through civil engineering. Its fantasy meets public infrastructure in the best way possible.

Best part about not being able to afford things, is whenever there is a boycott, I'm technically a part of it.

An app like Lyft, but it's just a dude that shows up in heelies and gives you a piggyback ride to your destination.

Make America Rocky IV Again. (When we actually fought Russians)

Whenever I hear MAHA (make America healthy again)

Thanks to the economy, teenagers are taking out student loans just to egg someone's house.