Thursday flashback. During the great mental breakdown of 2021, in recovery I got really into charity shop fashion (through being skint). So here are three tops/shirts/blouses that cost a svelte total of £4.50. I miss being the King AND Queen of South Manchester chazzers Drink me in!

Thursday flashback. During the great mental breakdown of 2021, in recovery I got really into charity shop fashion (through being skint). So here are three tops/shirts/blouses that cost a svelte total of £4.50. I miss being the King AND Queen of South Manchester chazzers Drink me in!

Dickie Bird passed. Much like Willie Thorne and Lester Piggott, as a kid I found all of their names so amusing (and not being able to Google them), I thought they were just fictional characters from old sitcoms from when my parents were young because older people mentioned them. I'm very normal 👍

Dickie Bird passed. Much like Willie Thorne and Lester Piggott, as a kid I found all of their names so amusing (and not being able to Google them), I thought they were just fictional characters from old sitcoms from when my parents were young because older people mentioned them. I'm very normal 👍

Happy 5th anniversary to when X-Factor winner and general arsehole Steve Brookstein was sounding off COVID-19 conspiracy nonsense, and the Twitter algorithm played a blinder and placed my joke below his ramblings. Steve naturally took it in stride.

Happy 5th anniversary to when X-Factor winner and general arsehole Steve Brookstein was sounding off COVID-19 conspiracy nonsense, and the Twitter algorithm played a blinder and placed my joke below his ramblings. Steve naturally took it in stride.

You know what we don't talk enough about? Robert the amateur magician doing his 'escape act' on Sky Star Search (1990). One of my favourite segments of TV ever broadcast Guest appearances by Keith Chegwin, Rustie Lee and Jim Bowen

I like how Peter Mandelson seems to get hired and fired seemingly every generation. It's a fun marker. He's like the political version of the Up Series, or Marty Jannetty. Lovely mix of politics, sociological reality documentary and pro wrestling references there for the venn diagram sickos

It's 9/11 and lemme tell you, I've always found the old World Trade Center fascinating. These giant steel monoliths reaching into the clouds. This is one of my favourite pics where some workmen are constructing the North Tower antenna. Gives me big 'absolutely NOT a job for me, taa' energy. Love it!

It's 9/11 and lemme tell you, I've always found the old World Trade Center fascinating. These giant steel monoliths reaching into the clouds. This is one of my favourite pics where some workmen are constructing the North Tower antenna. Gives me big 'absolutely NOT a job for me, taa' energy. Love it!

Nothing to see here... Just Tosh Lines from The Bill being the big daddy of Sun Hill to the sweet melodies of Steppenwolf. Enjoy your day!

Nothing to see here... Just Tosh Lines from The Bill being the big daddy of Sun Hill to the sweet melodies of Steppenwolf. Enjoy your day!

For 30 years, Father Ted was Graham Linehan's greatest contribution to comedy... Until he took the stand in his own defence 🍌

Evenin' all. Back after a few weeks away from here. Hope you're all doing smashing. What have I missed? Bonus pic of my lovely doggos to entice you.

Evenin' all. Back after a few weeks away from here. Hope you're all doing smashing. What have I missed? Bonus pic of my lovely doggos to entice you.

I feel mentally a bit burned out and exhausted, so I'm taking a few weeks off here again until I perk up. I think these breaks tend to help me keep some sort of balance and stop me having a mad raving freakout on here. Which I'd regret and just make people worried or upset. See you all soon 💙

If you find Jeremy Clarkson's annual A-level post a bit of an eye-roller, you can have this wonderful fact about his first marriage.

The best version of Ashes to Ashes is the one Rik the peoples poet does at the graveyard in 'Nasty' before Terry Jones nuts him #totp

Spare a thought for Sindy. Very much the 'WCW' of dolls to UK audiences. Congratulations to everyone who understands this reference.

Ash, have you found a playlist with every episode of London's Burning? ...yes. You're not are you? Really? ...erm.

Every time I hear the song 'Wuthering Heights', I always think of a fella on my university course who didn't know the song was about a novel, and on me revealing its background, came out with this pearl. 'You know, they should do more songs about books, because some books are quite long.'

Listened to The Who earlier. I like them. But, and this might be an unpopular opinion, whenever I hear Keith Moon described as a "wildman of rock", I do think to myself, is that a nice way of saying "an unbearable c**t to be around?" Because that's what I always think of him. Just a pain in the arse

Evening all. Here's an old joke I did about my lost love that is the video shop. That's it... Enjoy!

You see a wet floor sign. I see Ringo Starr falling into a pothole.

Couldn't think of a hilarious post today, so here I am in France having a walk looking, if I do say so myself, a right dish. If a terminally online political 'influencer' can get free money from thirsty centrists and I can't by looking like this, we're in the wrong timeline. Drink me in!

With James Whale now ceasing to be, let's "celebrate" his "legacy" with a lovely big dollop of @franticplanet.bsky.social

As it's Edinburgh Fringe season, here's a thing I made years ago.

I bloody love being absolutely spot on.

Nothing to see here... Just Deirdre Barlow from Coronation Street smoking and slapping fools to the sound of Whitney Houston. KEN, DO SOMETHING!!!

Rod Hull and Emu are so synonymous with each other that I can't separate them. So much so that anytime I think or read about how Hull died (falling off his roof adjusting his TV reception during a football match), that I imagine Emu was up there too.

£30

I ADORE this photo of Nick Drake because I have to remind myself every time that it's NOT a young James Hetfield from Metallica.

So Ash, what have you been up to in your spare time whilst not learning French? If you guessed it was watching 20 years worth of episodes of Aktenzeichen XY (the German version of Crimewatch UK, started from 1967, currently in 1986), I'd ask you to stop peering through the window. I. AM. FUN!

I'm a big wrestling fan and Hulk Hogan was extremely important even if I wasn't massively into him. This picture is really something. Hogan, Muhammad Ali, Liberace, Cyndi Lauper and Women's champion Wendi Richter promoting Wrestlemania in 1985. What a collection of characters in one photo.

🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧 WHEN BRITAIN WAS A PROPER COUNTRY 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧 ⭐⭐A VIDEO CELEBRATION⭐⭐ Forgot those nostalgia pages with pictures of old council estates as a front for people to be racist. Here's a PROPER tribute to when you could be proud to be BRITISH! 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧

Thank you for all the lovely birthday messages today. 38 is the new *insert age here blah blah* Much love. Stay Alive! ❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🩷

Not the birthday present I wanted. Where do you begin with Ozzy? I genuinely expected him to become the oldest human to ever live, THEN die. Just seemed the kind of mad achievement he'd pull off given he had more lives than several cats. Working class, funny, barmy AF, awful wife, a real rare one!

It's my birthday today! I'm 38, skint, feeling a bit meh, but I'm still alive so that's a boon. If you want to buy me a pint, I'm gonna be a MASSIVE C**T and post my Ko-fi page, because unfortunately I don't make centrist dads thirsty, so I can't work that grift x

🧵 CONSPIRACY THREAD 🧵 Was the BOTTOM 'bench' real or am I going a bit doolally? Join me as I don my tinfoil hat to figure out something that really bugs me. Did the bench from the Bottom title sequence really exist or have we done a Mandela Effect for something that wasn't ever there? Cont. 👇

Because of the miserable timeline we are in, I reckon we're like days away from serious chin stroking think pieces about the Coldplay couple, how society (plebs) are the bad guys for making a CEO resign. Then they'll start a relationship podcast, pull a crypto scam, make bank and completely vanish.

I used to date this goth who looked a bit like Keren from Bananarama. As nice as she was, the speed of her wrist control was that of a paint shaker and I was in absolute tatters. Hope she's doing well.

My mate wanted to go into CEX yesterday, and I rather embarrassingly had to tell them I wasn't allowed in the shop. "Why?" they replied. "BECAUSE I'M NOT A VIRGIN OR A PAEDO" God, sometimes I am tectonically funny.

That Jet2 holiday thing but if done by an overdramatic Shakespearean actor.

7 years ago today, I was MC'ing an open mic at a pub in Warrington and two blokes interrupted at the start to try and flog knock-off aftershave and fake rolex watches. Yep. They were nicked later on, gave false names and the names they gave were mates who had larger outstanding warrants. Amazing!