What time is The Rapture scheduled for tomorrow? Will the right-wing Christian Nationalists be able to watch Jimmy Kimmel and get super angry one last time before they go?

In conclusion, hateful radical right-wing propagandist is assassinated by follower of a rival even more hateful and right-wing asshole.

Birthday wishes from JD Vance to Jeffrey Epstein just released!

I’m starting to think the guy whose maternal grandparents moved to South Africa because of the racism, is named after a character from a science fiction book written by a literal Nazi, gave the Nazi salute twice at an inauguration event, who charged $4.20 (Hitler’s birthday) for cybertaxi rides...1

Cant believe Musk’s new party already has a theme song. Its no ‘I Like Ike’ but still… youtu.be/Ee_uujKuJMI?...

The one negative from the outcome of yesterday’s NYC primary election is the slogan ‘Don’t rank Cuomo’ really doesn’t have any use now. It’s a shame, it’s so simple, loaded and catchy.

Here is three straight minutes of Donald Trump saying things will be happening “in two weeks” (spoiler alert: none of them ever happened)

BREAKING: Majority of the Supreme Court proves themselves to be as bigoted as you already thought they were.

When conservative gun nuts fight against gun control because they are concerned about ‘tyranny’ they mean they are worried they won’t be able to help impose it.

Every elected Republican should be asked if they think the president has the power to send in military in to “liberate” a state or city from its elected government.

When a cabinet member announces "We are using the military to liberate an American city from its elected leaders," where do you go from there. What is left to say. The idea of that being anything short of a near-universal "Wait, what the fuck is going on" moment proves how far we've backslid.

OK, maybe he should be Captain America...

OMG, I figured out which German leader Trump is trying to become. www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_hU...

the richest, most powerful man in the world is the kid in the school cafeteria who ate mustard packets for attention

Pres Trump is so amazingly smart by reversing the decision made last week by that complete and utter moron...checks notes...Pres Trump.

BRB, gotta go ask 77,302,580 people if they are ashamed of how stupid they are.

All this nagative news about the markets going down, it's important to point out the good things. Like right now the DOW is down about 3.2% so far today, on a more positive note Tesla is down 8.4%.

What Trump voters and supporters need to realize about Donald Trump is he is very stupid. What Trump voters and supporteers need to realize about themselves is they are also very stupid.

Those trying to understand the tariffs as economic policy are dangerously naive. No, the tariffs are a tool to collapse our democracy. A means to compel loyalty from every business that will need to petition Trump for relief. 1/ A 🧵 to explain his plan and how we fight back.

The days of Elon's stupid ideas are over. It's time for Trump's stupid ideas

I’m willing to call it the Gulf of America for the next four years if this also replaces Hail to the Chief during that time. youtu.be/pct1uEhAqBQ?...

"Let's not take the soul-sucking path of sacrificing the most persecuted for that which we deem to be most popular. I know that there are transgender children right now looking out at this world and wondering if anyone is going to stand up for them and for their simple right to exist. Well, I am."

I cannot stess this enough, this is one of the best shows I've seen in years. Season two in two months: www.youtube.com/watch?v=AE4w...

MAGA Farmer wants us to “come together” now that he’s facing the consequences of his vote. “I didn’t read project 2025 because it was my understanding that wasn’t what he was running on” 🙃🐆 youtube.com/shorts/9LtSM...

So a kleptocracy is a government run by corrupt leaders, a kakistocracy is one run by incompetent people, an oligarchy is one run by a few select people (usually the rich). What is it called when a government is run by a petulant toddler?

Pop quiz: People are saying the kid says “you’re not the president you need to go away” — do y’all hear it too?

What is the city of Philadelphia’s light pole grease budget? Gonna spend that amount pretty early this year.

TRUMP TRADE WAR UPDATE: Colombia: Lasted 4 hours - Trump accepts what was already offered. 🇨🇴 Mexico: Lasted one weekend - Trump accepts worse than before. 🇲🇽 Canada: Lasted one weekend - Trump accepts what was already agreed. 🇨🇦 Two-step process established: 1. Try to look tough 2. Just fold 🤡

Yes, this administration is dangerous and cruel, but they are also shockingly dim and incompetent. Opportunities are everywhere. Make everything as hard as possible. Resist every demand. Refuse entry without a warrant. Don’t take the buyout. Their problem solving skills are 📉

➡️ January 20: FAA director fired ➡️ January 21: Air Traffic Controller hiring frozen ➡️ January 22: Aviation Safety Advisory Committee disbanded ➡️ January 28: Buyout/retirement demand sent to existing employees ➡️ January 29: First American mid-air collision in 16 years Making America Great Again!

Putting Republicans in charge of the government is like putting a dog in charge of vacuuming the house. The dog HATES the vacuum. Not only will the job not be done, the situation will be worse than before, the vacuum will be destroyed, and the dog will be proud of what it’s done.

"Obviously it is not standard to have aircraft collide. I want to be clear on that." -- Sean Duffy, our new secretary of transportation in the new awful administration.

RFK Jr is a broken clock. He is colossally wrong about many many things, but then I do believe he has a point regarding processed food and their health consequences etc. Also by broken clock, I mean incredibly deranged and dangerous clock.

Who had one week until a pardoned Jan 6er was in a shoot out with cops?

Michael Fanone live on CNN: "This is what I'd say to Stewart Rhodes: Go fuck yourself"

Trump pardons #J6er Peter J. Schwartz #BearSprayMan Schwartz has a criminal history of 38 prior convictions going back to 1991, several of which involved assaulting or threatening officers or other authority figures. This is MAGA

Sergeant Gonell @sergeantaqgo.bsky.social sent me this picture. This is his call log. Each call is an automated Dept of "Justice" notification saying "The defendant you testified against is being released from the dept of corrections." Each defendant assaulted him.

I will contribute $5 (that’s right a whole five dollars) to any reporter thats asks Trump, on camera, what Elon Musk’s balls taste like.

Voting for Republicans is like giving a dog the chore of vacuuming the house. It can’t do it and in fact hates the vacuum. You end up with a bigger mess than before you started.

Todays edition of ‘Jesus Christ are cops evil’ cbs12.com/news/local/b...

Morning Joe doth protest too much, methinks.

Consensus of medical doctors, virologists, and science in general over the last 100+ years is that vaccines work. But, I dunno, I feel I need the opinion of at least one former heroin addict to make a determination.

Oh sure, first Gaetz, what's next? Every one of Trump's proposed administration members that have been credibly accused of sexual assault? /s

ahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha

If The Onion, Cards Against Humanity and John Oliver/Last Week Tonight were to pool their resources and efforts there would be no stopping this colossal force of chaotic good.