⠀ i should run through freddy fazbear's peacha with a bunch of magnets strapped to me like a bomb vest for robots ⠀

⠀ @everyone Frank, an eight year old thirty two year old with a sense of extreme violence, glides on his bulldozer across the destroyed asphalt over the Denny's parking lot. The roar of the truck blends with the distant screams of everyone as he enjoys the pointless destruction. ⠀

⠀ the guy with no ears ⠀

⠀ I'm gonna . . . ⠀

⠀ ❝ muh... midnight spankle.... ❞ ⠀

⠀ ❝ Is this broad botherin' ya? Come back to bed. ❞ [ SEXY_SAXOPHONE.MP3 ] ⠀

⠀ ❝ Man, chief, ya never met the Sawyer family. ❞ ⠀

⠀ rep ⠀

⇅ 〝 I got Little Women and the Quran. 〞 ❝ Those'll do. ❞ Frank got to work sliding the 1800s coming of age story and religious text under the sofa to act as the new leg. 〝 Inshallah give Meg, Jo Beth, and Amy thy strength to hold my couch. 〞 ⇅

⠀ it's the "this is GLORPSHIT" thing creature ⠀

⠀ ❝ You know, I can't help but feel that my fists have banished some poor soul to the Twilight Zone. Or maybe it's the government trying to hypnotize me into misremembering historical events again. ❞ [ odd, blue, virtuous glow in his chest. ] ⠀

[ WHATISTHISTHINGWHATISTHATWHATWHATAUAUTYHGETITOFF ]

⠀ ❝ BONJOUR, I'M ⠀ "CHEESED" ⠀ TO MEET YOU! ❞ ⠀

⠀ [ opening newspaper ] ❝ Huh. "Screaming infant holds philosophical debate with beloved Mcdonaldsland character "The Grimace" in an attempt to locate his two extra missing arms. Story developing." I hate politics. ❞ ⠀

⠀ ❝ Oh thank god. I thought they were serious for a moment! Good to know it was just a prank. Hey do you know how to move a couch? ❞ ⠀

⠀ [ dragging a couch amidst this chaos ] ❝ Hey you don't know me and I dunno you but HOO boy you sure are lucky that giant red truck whatshisname is off doing some other shit right now. ❞ [ continuing to drag his sofa ] ⠀

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ E͟V͟E͟R͟Y͟O͟N͟E͟’͟S͟ ⠀ 𝘚𝘏𝘈𝘗𝘌 ⠀ 𝐒𝖤𝖱𝖵𝖤𝖲 ⠀ 𝘼 ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ 𝙋𝙐𝙍𝙋𝙊𝙎𝙀. ⠀ ⠀

⠀ PRO-TIP: People who lived in China during the "social credit" craze can convert their social credits into "funny points", a legal tender that can be exchanged for prizes like this "talk tuah hand" shirt and mold-covered "chicken jockey" youtooz figure. ⠀

⠀ ❝ It's easter! Time to carefully pick out my easter egg! ❞ [ GRABS @ingeniousmadman.bsky.social ] ⠀

⠀ PRO-TIP: People who lived in China during the "social credit" craze can convert their social credits into "funny points", a legal tender that can be exchanged for prizes like this "talk tuah hand" shirt and mold-covered "chicken jockey" youtooz figure. ⠀

⠀ ❝ You know who else wanted to go home? ❞ . . . ❝ E.T. That little brown scrotum alien. And he did! Despite the government telling him no. A national hero, though between you and me I think he had a few too many probes to the head, that dumb fuck. ❞ ⠀

⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐀 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐘 𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐍𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝑺𝑳𝑰𝑫𝑬, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀& 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐖𝐒 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍' 𝐓𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐑, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀& 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝑼𝑵𝑾𝑰𝑵𝑫, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗𝐈𝐎𝐍'𝐒 𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍' 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐑 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐐𝐔𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐅𝐈𝐗 !!! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #MVRP #HORRORRP #OCRP ⠀

⠀ jones, the horse hallucinations are back ⠀

⠀ ❝ What the FUCK is that ❞ ⠀

⠀ ❝ JUST LIKE THE UNITED FAILURE WEBSITE OF "TWITTER: RATED X VERSION" I CANNOT BROWSE THE TAGS WITHOUT SEEIN' SOME HUGE BADONKIES BAHOOGAS AND GIRLS' BAGINAS ❞ ⇅

⠀ maybe the trans were the formers along the way ⠀

⠀ ❝ Ya think them Autobots and Decepticons know who the 𝘛𝘶𝘳𝘣𝘰 𝘛𝘦𝘦𝘯 is? ❞ ⠀

⠀ In this spine-chilling, terrifying, scrotum-tingling, boner-shrinking video, we see a youtuber, named "Keith Extreme Trespass" enters an abandoned hospital where a man killed his entire family, then himself, then his goldfish, incited a summoning ritual for 8 demons... ⇅

ㅤㅤ 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙚 27 𝙘𝙡𝙪𝙗 . ㅤㅤ

⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝘵𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘥 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #MVRP #HORRORRP ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐋 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐔𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐋𝐃 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐎𝐅 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐃𝐈𝐑𝐆𝐄 𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐒 ⠀

⠀ ❝ Ah! Yoshi! Hello. Do that funny noise whenever you and that fatass italian complete a level, y'know... "Yobble yobble" or something along those lines. ❞ ⠀

⠀ "h-hi... d-do you wanna go to the prom with me? uhm... you don't?! ungher ungha that doesn't make senpai very happy!!! there was a beast inside of me and now you unleashed it!!!! GRAAAH-" [ flashes that one image of the ben garrison crying basketball ] ⠀

ㅤ 𝐈fㅤthere's O͢N͢E͢ T͢H͢I͢N͢G͢ㅤ𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦 onㅤ #𝐂YBERTRON seems to be missing.⠀, it's a little 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯. ᵀᴴᴱ ᴬᴿᵀ ᴼᶠ ᴰᴱᴸᴱᴳᴬᵀᴵᴼᴺ﹗ ㅤ

my vision for the nintendo punch out brand is a game where you can punch dumptsers, piles of shit & fat ugly penises and just win every time

⠀ tragic ⠀