I reserve my worst jokes for DMs

I love when you talk to me like that* *clearly and succinctly

I have so many mouth sounds I sound like a bug

[Experiencing an intense stabbing pain in my gut and closing my eyes serenely]: Finally. Yes. I'm ready.

Me when it's hot and sunny: We need some RAIN in this bitch Me when it's raining: This rain needs to ease UP Me when it's overcast: Where is the SUN

she's got that hat wealth

rich in hats [figuratively]

The amount of hats I throw in rings, you'd think I have an unlimited supply of hats, and rings,

Kill me to death!! !

This post ripped away my last shred of sanity

If your name is Tobias, unfortunately, I am in love with you

I'm a 'wormly' girl, myself,

I'm a 'warmly' girl, myself,

She collide on my large hadron till I CERN

[The only religious guy at a table, trying to find his moment]: I like me a “Lot” of salt..! [His smile fades as he accepts the salt shaker now being passed to him]: Thanks

Downloads is the new Desktop

The Body Keeps the Score

TEAM TAWNY 🥇

(throwing up blood) uh oh i did not eat that much blood

ACT NOW

Australia is the alt-milk capital of the world

The king's horses don't even have thumbs

desktop computer... save me..

save me desktop computer

turns out it was a desktop computer desktop computer, everybody

Leaning against things #classiccoolstuff

At this point I can just call everyone Ben and I'll be right 28% of the time

an angel moves too fast to see

Podargus

Tawny Frogmouth keeps losing @australia.theguardian.com bird of the year because of woke

NATURE INCREASE THY THUNDERS

I am vile scum

I love doing this every day!!! :) I love it!

Elliot is here

Sweet of spotify to suggest I make a playlist. As though listening to one single song on repeat for six weeks was not a Deliberate Choice

My electrician, Elliot: This won't take too long [Me, white-knuckling through the urge to say "Elliot like my Stardew husband"]: Cool, shout out if you need anything

I have that disease that @snakeroot.bsky.social has. Not the Buddhist one

As the candlelight stutters against your mouth, my world narrows to that trembling light. My body thrums in echo. The space between us pulls taut like a thread.* *in anguish

I've always dreamed of being a creature

Grim posting

I haven't felt like this since the 28th of September 2010

Yup

Empanada is Spanish for “imp of nothing”

Why was I saying this. Why did these words leave my mouth

One of you has a crush on me. It's maths

[Listening to the shuddering metallic shriek of the future collapsing in on itself]: Is this... the song of the summer?

I am situated in time and space.

I set my watch to beep every hour and now I am omniscient

Don't like this post! It is a trap