Every night there is a small but real chance I will be yanked awake like a tuna caught on a fishing line because my cat stepped on my balls

I'm in a pickle so i'm going to be opening commissions early this year! looking to fill 3 spots maybe more! Use the form below for more info and sign up. And if you like what I do but cant commission please share! it helps so much! tr.ee/f39qmxeGWi

AI glasses except it's really just a voice chat with a woman who is fed up with your dumb ass for buying AI glasses "What am I looking at?" "Bitch, do you need a better prescription?"

It's been a month since I started learning guitar, timing isn't the greatest, but I'm using one of the best themes in gaming to help build my muscle memory

I had vertigo for the first time when I woke up and felt like I was going to puke for a few hours, then I looked online and tried this voodoo Konami code body movement to esuna that shit out of me and it actually worked Keep this one in your spellbook my dudes

Stop calling it Twitter, it hasn't actually been that for ages, it's "the site that generates photorealistic deepfake CP from children's photos"

Gave pckt a test (blogging on ATproto): a roundup of some of the most memorable movies I watched in 2025!

This "Favorites" playlist is nothing but bangers

Watched Avatar (2009) again since I figured I'd see the newer ones, still not understanding why this movie attracts so much hate It's fine? Some cool stuff, some sappy stuff. 3 out of 5

New feed, there could be insane shit on it so make sure your content preferences are correct

Been in the pits lately but forgot to post the updated collar design, simpler and better proportions, didn't half ass the materials this time Unity viewport, ~13k tris

*surprised pikachu*

Enjoying my adult dinner of spicy nuggies and gatorade

Good account to help keep up with the eroding of the arts in games, and maybe help you avoid paying for one without realizing it: @slop-detected.bsky.social

If I was president I would ban caramel popcorn balls and save countless children from absolute torture during basically every holiday

"No children in cart" Thanks but I can see that already, buddy

When I was little I thought a partridge was a pastry and thought it was weird someone put that shit in a pear tree

You know you're watching an ad for a fragrance when you have no idea what it's for until the last 1 second

Right when I'm about to release my new Catahoula Crunch cereal, the US government steals its name to hunt immigrants

I'm an ordinary 30-something who eats spray whipped cream off a spoon until it makes my tum tum upset

If I had a football team it would be named the Arkansas Humans, and the outfits would be solid tan so that from the stands it looks like lil naked dudes running around

Why did people buy newspapers when they put spoilers in all caps on the cover

When I was little I used to hope aliens would abduct me, and I would live on their ship like a pet and have my own room with every videogame

Musicians cool with AI cover art: eat a bag of dicks

Netflix and chill? Uhh listen can we split the subscription cost at least, I'm not made of money

brb joining the Navy so I can feast upon Italy's greatest delicacy: gummy worms

Found this gem in the Amazon reviews of Wheel of Fortune for PlayStation 2

Didn't you just have a birthday like a year ago?

I wasn't completed before Halloween, but I'll see ya'll soon! 🎃 Stay safe tonight!

Had a dream that I was a narcoleptic plumber trying to not fall asleep and dunk my own head into a clogged toilet

I got stunlocked at the store by Collectors Edition Wheaties wondering who the fuck is collecting Wheaties

The "Best By" date makes no sense, if I'm desperate enough to be checking the date on my food then what I really need is the "Worst By" date

Learning that chewing more than 5 times before swallowing is probably better

I want to eat dark chocolate cherry and nut bars without my ass becoming a Bag of Holding that can store 64 cubic feet of gas

Been using Win 11 for like 3 years and the posts about Win 10 end of life make it sound like I should have died from radiation exposure by now It's the same shit, the adjustment period was like 30 minutes

Nearly a decade with Unity and I learn you can move objects relative to the camera by holding shift

"ChatGPT says-" CEASE, clanker relay, your gospel is a blight upon these once fertile lands: a stench which burns the eyes and ruptures the mind. Your presence stains mine linens, cursed smog which not even mythic cauldrons of bleach can amend. Depart posthaste, return and perish.

I did one of those goofy personality tests that probably installs a virus on your phone thinking it was gonna be cute like the "what cookie are you?" ones and instead I got SHIT ON, curiosity really did kill the cat poomang.com/en/t/keyword...

25% OFF on commissions all of October!! 🎃🎃🎃 I need that pumpkin spice!! And still have the raffle going on!

I fuckin love oatmeal send post

Evolution of Silksong posts "omg please release in 2024" "omg please release in 2025" "$20?? take my money based indie devs" "goty so beautiful absolutely stunning best $20 EVER" "wow this is harder than hollow knight" "ive been on this part for 2 weeks" "i cant take it anymore"

Things I bring to a 💞 relationship: 🦴 Bones 🥩 Flesh 👃 Nose

Are you okay? Is someone in the room listening to you? Tell me your favorite dinosaur and rip the fastest fart of your life if you want me to send The Dudes

"steel cut oats"? Don't waste my time, Quaker Oats Company, I don't care what your oats scissors are made of

Why don't pools have a big mesh like a McDonalds deep fryer inside that they can lift up to pull everyone above water We could strategically name it the Idiot Cage so people don't get too comfortable with the immense safety it would provide

If I don't get the new AirPods with the heart rate monitor how will I know my heart is still beating Thank you Tim Apple

Remembering when my middle school art teacher kicked me out into the hallway for the rest of class, because my drawing of the person next to me was so bad that she refused to believe I wasn't trying to troll her and I couldn't stop laughing

Sometimes I feel very out of touch with games when power washing, being a janitor, and working at a grocery store games are among the most popular

Sharing one last time as the month is almost over!! Get any of my albums for $2 for the next two days! 🎵✨

You could be all by yourself and if you even whisper the word "bidet" someone is gonna appear behind you and start telling you how their ass fountain changed their life and how you absolutely have to get one