The government website trying to keep my pension contributions was, like, "STOP! Are you SURE you want to withdraw? You are eligible for full retirement in 2044." BITCH, THAT'S A MADE-UP NUMBER! 2044?? F OFF FR FR.

Be me filling out forms to withdraw three month's worth of pension contributions after rage quitting my local government job.

Michelob successfully selling their Ultra as a “premium“ beer is an all-time con job. It’s watered down swill at any price.

So this boomer hops out of the stylist's chair and yells, "Bye!" And power walks to the door before spinning around with his, "Just kidding!" The stylist has to fake laugh and engage in a conversation about what if she had to chase him outside. JFC call the cops anyway.

Retirement community life. The same old guys who line up for near-daily unnecessary car washes are also lined up for their weekly pretend haircuts. 🤷🏻‍♂️ Guess I got nowhere else to be.

Be me doing every chore I can think of to avoid sitting at the computer and sending my final paycheck off to the evil multi-state conglomerate that owns my crumbling one-bedroom apartment. Can't we please do the general strike already and end the suffering?? 😭

I thought this little boy running around the park last night was dressed as Robin, but no he was the Portugal soccer team. ⚽️ 🦇

I dyed my boots so they wouldn't remind me of my county police uniform. 🤔 Do they look more like bad-ass flames or Ronald McDonald? 🔥🔥🤡

Be me selecting "white" and "male" and "not disabled" and "not veteran" at the end of every job application. ME: ...fuck.

Bruh, why am I crying? I filled my bathtub up with bleach and am letting it soak while I fill out online applications, but my vision is suddenly blurry af. 🤩 My apartment also smells like a public pool.

Be me unemployed one week. ME: I really need to apply for jobs today. ALSO ME: What would happen if I dropped black underwear into pure bleach? 🤔

😳 🐦‍⬛ GOOD MORNING, SHINY SHADOW ROOKIDEE! #POKEMONGO

LAS NOTICIAS #WritingCommunity #Podcasts 📝🐾 Animal Control Blog bestifyoudontcom.wordpress.com/2026/06/24/life-after-dreams-teeth-tails-and-the-cup-i-mean-cop/ 📹🌈 Kindness Part 1 Podcast youtu.be/kpWXhGojNa0 📹🌈 Kindness Part 2 Podcast youtu.be/KZYX-OJmKOQ 😷✂️ Cancer Fundraiser gofund.me/467d8fbd0

I GOT SPAMMED IRL!!!!

It’s her hat now (she peed in it) #cats

"SubPAR, SubLACK, SadSTACK" If you're still using #Substack you need to dO yOUr oWN reSEarcH regarding the white supremacy association. Fr fr. Thanks @hollowoak.bsky.social for continuing to ring the bell. bestifyoudontcom.wordpress.com/2026/06/29/s...

🍻🍻🍻

Cast-iron Perfection. 🫣🍔 Fix dinner and enjoy today's episode of The Spectacular Misfits! 🌈 KINDNESS PART II 🥰 youtu.be/KZYX-OJmKOQ

@hollowoak.bsky.social Cancer caught a fade from messing with Big Womack! Cut tf out! ✂️ Let's help make Chris whole: gofund.me/467d8fbd0 Cancer Free youtube.com/shorts/_65IB...

@lfrostwrites.bsky.social EXCITING NEWS!! Special Upcoming Guest youtube.com/shorts/R6UCs...

Who inspires your kindness? Who taught you to be a good person? Who are your role models? Kindness Role Models youtube.com/shorts/0li5W...

The public perception of Michael Jackson and Cesar Chavez. Legacies aren't frozen in time, the truth thaws them out. On a smaller scale, are we worried about our reputations after passing?? Legacy of Doubt youtube.com/shorts/gCFLW...

What happens when you lose your kindness and it's not your fault?? Cognitive Decline youtube.com/shorts/xeXuJ...

ALL THE KIND THINGS! 🍀🪁🦋🐱🎁 youtu.be/KZYX-OJmKOQ

My son has been thinking about his second tattoo, and settling on another fantasy weapon. However, he wanted "DOMAIN EXPANSION" for awhile, but my mom put her foot down because, "That sounds like something a terrorist would say."

Hello 3-for-$8, my old fren. Beer belt has to tighten now.

Goddess help me!

I restored a childhood artifact and baked pancake muffins. Running out of homey things to do waiting for my teen to wake. Nature walk it is! 🌞🧁

Another plasma bro caught me at the exit and asked how I can start my donation after him but finish before him. Hydration.

Nothing against the tree crew with chainsaws outside my window, but it's Saturday!!!! My apartments are run by Trump cabinet wannabes.

Apparently, a new anime movie is in theaters. SON: Check when Bleach is playing tomorrow. ME: 4 p.m. and 7 p.m. Should I buy us tickets? SON: Not yet. If my friends want to see it, I'll go with them.

OK. Mark Kelly and Gabby Giffords have had the better part of a year to decide to follow me back. UNFOLLOWED! Friendship is a two-way street, folks!

YOU GUYS, IT'S ALL GONNA BE OK!! ✊️ #JESUS ✊️ #TRUMP 💦 #ALPHA-RIZZ

Author banner? Check Hat of whimsy? Check About to embark on the trip of many trips.

HOW OVER IS IT? LMAO! thehill.com/policy/energ... If you haven't already, delete Facebook & cancel Amazon Prime. Too bad the thumbnail is the water bottle guy because the forecast photos are CHILLING. Actually, "chilling" isn't the correct word. Nobody gets to chill again ...ever. 🤷🏻‍♂️ Sweltering.

🛡🐾 LATEST BLOG bestifyoudontcom.wordpress.com/2026/06/24/l... 🎵🎙 LATEST PODCAST youtu.be/kpWXhGojNa0 🔪😷 ONGOING FUNDRAISER gofund.me/467d8fbd0

Small price to pay so rich people can be richer! 🤣 If you haven't already, delete Facebook and cancel Amazon Prime. www.usatoday.com/story/news/n...

🎟 NO TICKET!

A long time ago... EVIL EX-GF: 😍 Is there anything you'd change about our relationship? ME: When we met, I told you I was looking to meet someone so I wouldn't have to go to my school fundraisers alone. You've never once gone despite constantly taking PTO on other days. EVIL EX-GF: *WW3 noises*

My son's new driver's license is the standard license. To get the travel-enhanced license we have to go back with his passport and a piece of mail in his name. THIS SHIT AGAIN?!!? 🤬😭😢 OK... deep breath. Stress is really piling up these days. ⭐️✈️

The mentality of most drivers bewilders me. I'm already going 5 miles over the speed limit. Why rage pass me just to meet up at the next light? Every car trip, every time. Cars were a mistake.

Here's a big update on life, struggle, adversity, hope, friendship, dogs, danger, and my penis and balls. Thank you for your attention to this matter. #WritingCommunity bestifyoudontcom.wordpress.com/2026/06/24/l...

SPRITE + TEA?! Capitalism me in, baby! I'm finally getting back into writing. #WIP #WRITINGCOMMUNITY

BYE TEETH!! "Heat-induced dehydration and its catastrophic effects on oral chemistry." "This was environmental collapse writing itself directly into human biological systems." ☀️🦷 If you haven't already, delete Facebook and cancel Amazon Prime. #ClimateChange www.thexylom.com/post/pakista...

Time to rip the bandaid off and tell my family I quit job # 25. My mom loves me no matter what, but my dad and son are far more judgemental. And I used "people were mean to me" too many times. Gonna go with "shit myself in a room full of people."

PLAYING WITH MYSELF! 📱😎📱 #PokemonGO

One of my pairs of khaki pants turned black in the BLACK dye bath, but the other one turned GREEN! LMAO! I hope my next job enjoys green pants.

Episode 8 Kindness Part 1 youtu.be/kpWXhGojNa0 FRENS! WE'RE LOOKING FOR *KINDNESS*!! DO YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND IT TODAY???

The Qualities of Kindness youtube.com/shorts/6AikQ... We try to be... Good Likable Respectful Tolerant Mature Responsible Loyal Empathetic Human KIND.

The Power of Kindness youtube.com/shorts/JLPBp... Kindness matters! We can solve any crisis together. Where do you see kindness happening today?