Can anyone vouch for this? I’m 14 pages in and it’s… not compelling

Who has got all the birds? Not a single one in my garden. I miss the cacophony.

The straw that broke the camel’s back for me hosting an Airbnb is the last guest, who gave us 5 stars, but private messaged to suggest I could spray the insects “around the property” (ie outside). It’s 3 acres and I freaking love the insects. We’ve worked hard to encourage those pollinators.

Lots of people have had a good old moan to me about Thorndon Quay being a complete shitshow, so I was somewhat expecting some element of it being a shitshow, but it looks pretty much the same? Heaps of parks? Bike lane?

At least Penk provided a good reminder that I need to change the business address in my Instagram bio

share please. 4 different boner pills are funded. ONE Estrogen patch that doesnt work on most people that need it.

Conversely I look after the playlists for Wanda Harland. We don’t generally play Christmas tracks but I’ll make an exception for Last Christmas 😘

Glen lost his hearing aid 4 weeks ago while mowing our 3 acre paddock. It just appeared on our doormat. I honestly think it was returned by magpies. There’s no way we wouldn’t have seen it, and they’ve been tearing up the mat. I love them.

Holy shit they did it

Kudos to the young folk.

I just want to live in a city where people aren't obsessed with parking and blaming WCC on everything. I'm not even in Wellington. A certain generation is just IRATE at the moment, and they're not fun to have in the shop.

5am is a very inconvenient time for an earthquake in terms of getting back to sleep. Family group chat is going off.

Brainstorming ideas for Airbnb treats. What have you enjoyed at airbnbs? Initially we were leaving a bottle of wine and marshmallows (plus the usual tea, good coffee etc), but I remember staying a place where they had like a juice a beer a fizzy etc and that seemed great.

Rolling Meadows butter (ie the cheap brand) is $9.50 today at Moore Wilsons 🤡

We hooned over to Lyttelton for a nose at the sky. On the way back through Cashmere we passed all 5 million residents of Christchurch city driving up the hill.

I just nuked vinegar to freshen up the microwave, but it has effectively made the entire house smell like vinegar. Hey ho.

I feel almost high when the weather is like this. Where can I live and it be sunny and still all the time but not too hot and not too cold?

Also lovely @davidslack.bsky.social wrote about me (my paddock) in his newsletter so you’d better gosh darn subscribe ok? He sent me this fetching picture. You’ll have to subscribe for more ☺️ open.substack.com/pub/subslack...

I’m finally using the snail mucin serum I got in Korea, and after only a few days my skin is as soft as a baby (snail’s) bottom (foot)

who knows if this is news you can use, but as an avid fan of appliances, I'd like to share that the Ninja Creami is sitting at #1 spot. It's the best.

Just had a wee morsel of a special cookie and now I’m lying here listening to Herbie Hancock and planning on tinned tomato soup and garlic bread for dins. This is how I intend to spend my empty nest-hood.

I imagine you’re all waiting with bated breath for this retailer’s hot take (like One news and RNZ who called 😎). Anyway I don’t have a hot take. I’m just sad about it all really.

I just saw a TikTok that said a red flag is a white women having a spade tattoo. Well you’d best believe I headed straight to the comments, but it turns out my garden spade tattoo is not what they were talking about 😅♠️

I remember my mum weeping when Sharon Crosbie finished up at RNZ. Very much same emotions about Maggie Tweedie finishing up at Active 😭

He’s a little bit bloody, but he’s my new bunny friend (thanks to Richard Scarry and Jamie Renee at Dr Morse)

I’m got this cute lil app where you have a tamagotchi type thing, and if you don’t walk enough it collects poos. I have covid so yesterday did like 400 steps. Poor wee guy.

Bloody hell. 3 days of covid and I’m going absolutely stir crazy. At the same time I’m fucking loving just hiding in my room. I’m an enigma wrapped in a riddle.

It just gives me so much joy imagining Winston just sitting there, driving them fucking nuts.

I got 3 emails requesting phone conversations today 😭😭😭😭 I’m not cut out for that world anymore, I’m cut out for the world where we email what the fuck it is we want to know and they email back.

I keep trying to show my family the bone that is emerging from my gum and I think they don’t love me anymore 🥲

You’re all brainiacs. Someone has set up an imitation website to mine, it’s so obviously scammy. The hosts have requested the attached from me and I don’t even know what the hell a LOA would be? And as for the trademark stuff?!

Trying to learn a little Korean, to be able to be the teeniest bit more polite. The only word I know so far is “annyong” thanks to arrested development.

Niche tweet, but if you e been chucking out the Priority Pass that comes with your credit card, we just used it to get into a lounge in Tokyo and it fucking rules. Smooth jazz, yum food, respectful clientele.

I bought my Lifelong Suitcase a few years ago, aka A Very Expensive Samsonite of Great Beauty, and the fucking thing’s hinge (?) has just crapped out as we depart Japan. Disappointed by my hero luggage 🥲

@chetibby.bsky.social are you folk in Tokyo? We’re just heading that way. Not sure how to message in this modern age, but you can reach me on iMessage or email [email protected]

In further skincare chat, the main splurge I’ve made this year was a Dr Dennis Gross light mask. It’s actually miraculous, works on Glen’s old skin, my semi-old skin & cleared up my daughters acne super quick. Very expensive but gave me a level 3 at Mecca which provides fun freebies (inc La Mer)

Also I’ve just used the last of my La Mer eye cream, a freebie from Mecca, and I’m goddamned disappointed to say it is very good and I shall never have it again (it’s $400 to buy 😅). I’d like Bluesky to be more about people’s skincare tbh.

Maybe the best stoned I’ve been is tonight, home alone, lil tramadol and a lil codeine (leftover from wisdom teeth, but also taken to numb my dumb face nerves) lying on the couch listening to Active and watching TikTok’s. HOW GOOD. Apart from the face nerves.

Who has two thumbs and is going clamping in Busan?

Go on, guess how much the melatonin my oral surgeon prescribed cost. If you guessed $100, you’re bang on.

Youth of today, so different. We have this snack drawer, and it’s always got food in it? When I was young I’d have emptied it in two seconds flat. Incidentally those Grenade Salted Peanut protein bars are incredible.

Marriage in 2023

This may not be the most thrilling post for all the new folk here who are hoping for some excitement and whatnot, that will come later, but anyway MY GOD what is with all this pollen? My windows and car are absolutely covered in it.

Watching family reunions at the airport is the absolute best.

Just here booking a train to Busan because I’m super brave and unafraid of zombies. Also I saw a TikTok today about a cute camping spot there, and that’s all the motivation I need.

Those polls 😭 I might just stay in Japan. Then I could rent out our house and become… a landlord! What a time.

Yay! Just realised I’ll be out of the country for the election. Praise be. I’ll vote, of course, but our hill is absolutely riddled with hoardings of arseholes and it’ll be very pleasant to put the whole thing out of my mind.

I waited until now, 50, to get my wisdom teeth out, even though they’ve been telling me to do it for 25 years. It cost $5500 and a week and a half off work (so far). I’m very, very supportive of this announcement. Also, thanks for your interest, my mouth is still bloody sore.

Ok, let’s give this app the true test, can it answer my gardening question? Has anyone dealt with powdery mildew on your rhodos, and if so which specific product did you use?