I did it and can categorically say my boyfriend had the best sign in Berlin 🫡

The only force in the universe that matches my boyfriend’s strong wish for me not to get Botox is my complete and utter certainty that I’m going to do it.

It’s been 3yrs since my bestfriend & I spoke. I wish I could say there was a fight or an explosion, there wasn’t. We just drifted. Today I had phenomenal news & I simply want to tell her. But I tried 2.5yrs ago to reach out and she said no. And so .. just, I miss her, still. I reckon I always will.

I’m going to try get myself back into posting by becoming another tedious bore who posts #dinnerinspo I’m afraid. BUT, we’re starting off strong with a green goddess tuna salad & sticky rice that was goddamned delicious. Packed with protein and fibre and under 10 minutes to make. Unbeatable 🤌🏻

Guess who got to make @jonnelledge.bsky.social’s day today?

My appointment with the mortgage advisor has been made. Seems slightly mad that me, literally just a financial moron with too many shoes, may end up buying some property. How am I even going to attach it to my feet?

This was an exceptionally good dinner. Rice + puy lentils with lemon juice squeezed on it, leftover shredded roast chicken, cucumber, avocado and salsa topped with hot sauce. Then a tropical salad with tajin all over it. Yummy 🤤

Told my hairdresser I wanted to be just ... the most blonde. Mission success 👏🏻

I cannot believe I’m spending part of my one wild and precious life researching a fridge lightbulb that doesn’t emit the heat of Satan’s ballsack. I’m so tired of everything near it being slow-cooked whenever the fridge door’s left accidentally open though.

Every time I take the time to curl my hair properly I always think “goodness that looks excellent, I should do this more” but alas, I’m not a perma-blowdry sorta girly 😔

This is who runs this account

Office dog. Today’s now officially a good day 👏🏻

Is the internet capable of being normal about this if I honestly and sincerely ask: is there a way/place I can donate unopened boxes of condoms that are completely fine, just not needed anymore? I’d rather they get used than just expire in my cupboard. I wondered if food banks might take them?

Look, I say this with as little judgement as possible—as a woman who owns a Ninja smoothie maker and carries a Trader Joe’s tote bag—but you would not believe how many Stanley Cups are in the 7am Inferno Pilates class in Shoreditch on a Tuesday morning.

The ex-nanny in me needs to vent about this @theguardian.com article. I’m sorry, but who the fuck signed off on ranking The Smeds and the Smoos twelfth!? The fact that it’s not in the top ten is a travesty of justice that cannot stand. Absolutely livid over this. www.theguardian.com/culture/2025...

Trying to motivate myself for my Sunday long run by letting myself go the full Barbie 💝

My mission for the day is to try find out how as a 31yr old woman in London I can purchase Dill Pickle Mayonnaise. I have a hell of a craving (no, no chance I'm pregnant) and so far all purveyors seem to be in America and don't offer international shipping but I shall not be deterred.

Tried to do romance for my boyfriend and surprised him with a fancy dinner at an Italian (his favourite cuisine) restaurant on me. Paid a scary amount for said dinner. The result? He has food poisoning. So that’s gone well then

Once again dressing like Chessy from the Parent Trap because I thought she looked banging when I was four years old and I still think the same now

I’m a few months in to consciously attempting to up my protein intake and it’s going fairly well but goodness I eat so much Greek yogurt and so many butter beans now. Truly there’s been phenomenal growth in those areas of consumption

Today on my wanderings I found a Thomas hedge 🚂

I appear to have massive posting fatigue on every platform except Strava where my attention seeking knows no bounds. But otherwise .. I just cba.

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I ran home from Battersea Power station and stopped in Lidl at the end to buy green juice supplies so now I’m drinking a homemade green juice and well .. that’s just a bloody lovely Sunday isn’t it 😌

These were taken within 24hrs: Saturday I look sensational: great earrings, bit of a serve. Sunday I resemble a slug in Lycra, mid-gasp. The range is… frankly astonishing. If I didn’t know one was 9pm Sat & the other roughly 12pm Sun I’d say they couldn’t be the same woman let alone the same weekend

Six people at this Eurovision viewing party said I look excellent. Democracy works.

A lovely TfL man while we were waiting for our train asked us if we’d been for a run, we said yes and he said “wow that’s so impressive” and then noticed our accidental matching tops and said “I hope you took a lot of photos, you’ll want to remember this. Well done guys” so this is for you TfL man 🫡

My weekend plan is: Friday: Hackney Quarter (10k) Saturday: Parkrun (5K) Sunday: Hackney Half (21.0975K) That's 36.0975K or 22.429 miles. I am excited and looking forward to this plan. Does anyone else remember when I used to be cool? It suddenly seems so far away.

I seem to have developed a touch of “the sads” the last two days so now I’m wondering which mildly destructive coping mechanism to lean into. Today so far I’ve eaten avocado toast and been for a run so unsatisfactorily wholesome - no piercings or dates with terrible humans at all.

I’m finally watching Gladiator 2 and … do we think you can ride a rhino like a horse?

My run this morning lacked Greek views, stray cats, a friendly dog who joined for 300 metres and my toy boy. I don’t know how I’m supposed to survive such torture

First holiday with toy boy is going well 🤍🇬🇷 (Also did I get hotter in Greece? Because it seems like I did …)

The standard of pyjamas I’m willing to be seen in by my boyfriend has officially collapsed: we’re at oversized tie-dye Care Bears T-shirt levels. What a lucky guy 🙃

Runners, time for a super sexy question. How are you dealing with the dry skin that I assume is caused by your face being beaten by cold air all the time (wasn’t an issue for me b4)? I’m hoping it’ll get better in summer naturally but waking up with my skin flaking off every morning is making me sad

Toy boy had to borrow some running shorts from me for this one so enjoy the amount of thigh he’s got on show 👀

Read 'I Feel Bad About My Neck' in one sitting on Saturday. Now haunted by the state of my neck, furious I don’t have a standing twice weekly blow-dry appointment, & very close to booking lunchtime Botox. I’d say Norah Ephron ruined me, but let’s be honest: I was already fairly vain before the book.

Went for a treadmill fast run and then arrived at toy-boys where he’d made me slow cooked spicy pork belly soup. Today’s a good day 🙌🏻

Still riding high on the fact that the yellow stripey T-shirt I told my boyfriend to buy, even though he didn’t want to, got instant praise from both his mum and sister. “Thank God Katharine’s sorting out your wardrobe,” they said. Smug doesn’t even begin to cover it.

An idyllic Easter weekend has been had 🐣

We discussed the finances of moving in together today. The best part? He’s paying for all the food—but he refuses to step foot in Whole Foods or Planet Organic. That said, he will reimburse me for anything with a receipt. I’m about to be fuelled exclusively by £7 artisanal dried cranberries, babes 🫡

Working from home and had a moment of just looking over at my living room and being so happy and proud of my home. Not to everyone’s tastes I’m sure, but it’s perfect for me 🤍

Fourteen days into my period and I feel like a lone wife on the prairie, gazing out at the horizon - not for a man at war, but for the day I personally stop bleeding 🫠

If you see this post, share a pic from your device with no explanation.

A friend who gave me no end of grief for dating someone four years younger has just introduced her new boyfriend - who is seven years her junior. I’m saying nothing, of course. Just quietly preparing a PowerPoint entitled “My My How the Tables Turn.”

It would be more fun if we could have a wheel of fortune or lottery ball style show to discover what the global trade regime looked like every day. Put some showmanship into it.

I do not have a photo with my boyfriend where I have not just a minimum of ten 10k. Why is this the only time we take couples photos!?

ran 21.1km through central london yesterday, powered mostly by jelly babies and spite. here's some photos of me inexplicably enjoying it

*gazes wistfully out a window*

There has never been a soul more virtuous (I’ve finally cleaned my makeup brushes, it only took months of wondering how many new bacteria they were housing before I caved and did a job that bores me …)

Oh dear. In my rush to book a ticket to see Ceila Imrie in Backstroke I entirely overlooked that it's a matinee on a weekday. Guess I'll be explaining to my manager why I'm offline for a few hours 🫠