One of my favorite hobbies is blocking accounts that follow me where all they do is repost other people’s pics.

I stand by this statement. And I’m not surprised, really.

It’s not the stupid “I’m honored to announce” shit on LinkedIn that annoys me the most. It’s the people taking five paragraphs to argue for obvious and commonly held practices like they are dropping some kind of groundbreaking wisdom.

Walking a big dog in the snow as they plow through like it’s nothing… yeah, one of the least fun activities I can think of.

Post your most Daddy pic(s). There are many versions of that role within me.

You, in another decade. 20 years ago. I was baby.

I’m a certified genius with crippling low self-esteem. Too real?

Independently wealthy multimillionaire philanthropist world traveler and part-time professional actor.

Do fascist criminal dictators even do State of the Union addresses? I mean, why bother, seriously.

Kevin James has developed into my ultimate type. I have lost my words and devolved into guttural sounds.

Yep, I’ve reached that age where I go upstairs to get something, and by the time I get there, I’ve forgotten why I went up in the first place and look around dazed…

Billionaires should not exist. Yeah, I’m talking to you, Beyoncé. You’re staying mighty quiet over there with all that money and power while the world burns. Not even saying a peep about your scrub empire co-owner, already accused of raping a kid, ending up in the Epstein Files. What’s the tea, sis?

Hi, I’m antifascist. Go ahead. Come and get me, Gestapo. I look forward to my student loans, and then some, being paid off by my massive law suit while you rot in prison. Because it will happen.

Best in Show. Well, it’s true. Sometimes little ones from the toy category still perform the best.

Honestly, I would take another two years of pandemic lockdown over all of this. Sweet sweet quiet.

You’re on an 8 hour flight. Where are you sitting? #2 and he’s going to get the head of his life as soon as those cabin lights are off.

Yes, Noem is just a malignant tumor. Miller is the whole disease.

I got suspended for three days for wishing ill on billionaires. Yeah, fuck that and fuck them.

For the culture; for the allegory of black identity theft for white gain; the genius, inspired, stylistic choices; the vision; the genre elevation: Sinners is the film of the year. If it loses, it’s only further proof of the film’s thesis that we don’t respect or revere what we so callously steal.

3C, no hesitation. But I’d offer Francois the aisle seat.

Wow, just two days without my fiber gummies, and I’ve already proven that shitting a brick is not just a vulgar idiom.

Well, my first ever therapist called it. I have a DV record now. I was having a nightmare that I was trapped in a basement, and I was scratching and punching the door. I woke up suddenly to my husband yelling at me because apparently he was the door trapping me in…

This is my song! Turn it up!

This one needs to be the first in the pillory line.

At this point, I’d say even the most conservative Washingtonian is ready for secession. Come on Canada. Make a power play deal and absorb us into BC!

Oh, please ignore the EU/NATO/Danish warning and try to seize Greenland. Please!

Brownies should NEVER be cakey. The only acceptable brownie is dense and fudgy, and I will die on this cross.

Fellow Bearded Bloomfies: do you too find that one side of your beard grows faster than the other? Why is that? Or am I the only one and just a freak? (Well, I already know I’m a freak, but…)

And I’m teaching my students now to have the same philosophy. The abuse and wage theft by billionaires stops here. www.upworthy.com/gen-z-career...

It never fails. You guys always look sexier 10 years later.

2016 / 2026 Yep, not much has changed. Just some gray in my beard and a coupla new wrinkles.

I’ll complete the map someday. Really hoping to get to Hawaii and Maine for sure. tenpages.github.io/us-level/us....

Considering that I was a Scooter for years, I’m so happy to upgrade to an old-school sage. Take the quiz "Which Muppet are You” uquiz.com/quiz/CcnMhs/...

Now, hear me out…

Any country wanting to save us: if you choose to invade through the Pacific Northwest, you can just walk through. If we see you, no we didn’t. Go ahead and do your thing. No need to bomb your way through.

Oh this is giving me everything I need to start 2026. I know I will be dancing around my living room like nobody’s watching when this album drops. youtu.be/v-Cq_ZqXbd8?...

Today is one of those days where I just want to lay down on the floor and be attacked by a pack of rambunctious puppies all trying to steal my attention with kisses and nuzzles.

All I want in 2026 is the opportunity to piss on his grave.

Look, I’m not a furry, but hear me out…

MTV is officially ending all of its music channels. In honor of that, what's your favorite music video?

I honestly can’t think of anything, because if they did get mad, I didn’t give it a second thought. Nothing is that serious on here. Just have a cookie.

If we ever left Seattle, the only cities I’d move to without question are Portland, Minneapolis, Chicago, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, or Boston. If needed, I’d consider San Diego, San Francisco, Denver, Madison, Ann Arbor, NYC (or NJ suburb), or Baltimore. Anywhere else would require negotiation.

“How will you enter 2026?” Me:

See a fox, post a Fox. Naughty girls need love, too.

The fuck you say!? www.kuow.org/stories/toil...

Wow. Clocked.

Show me how your 2025 went

Are the microplastics what is making my *** so thick lately?

Daddy made me

Well, shit. Here we go…