I may be just a bit fucking furious with the world and it's people right now, given my mother's current physical health and a multitude of other things, particularly concerning the behavior of some people in this community. If you're reading this, bear with me. Please.

He's one of those Deep South types. That means if you're around him enough, he'll frequently drop n****r and r****d. He's an ass, but he means well enough, long as you're not invading his property or trying to start shit.

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My uncle and aunt came down from Illinois to see her. He's an assf*$&, but he's also got cancer problems. He raised a lot of good grandkids, and we lost his bitch daughter to it too. He's been through Hell, even if he doesn't show it.

You're all holding something just as hurtful as what this man said in. You're just too cowardly and comfortable (read: priveleged) in life to admit it. 😐

Don't even have an answer, do you? For this, or anything else. Go to Hell, if you aren't there already. 😐

Time lapsed: 12 hours Amount eaten: 0 My blood sugar is only at 124. Maybe I should have another full dose of insulin? Or maybe just walking out in the smoldering Sun will be enough. 😐

So? How many more people do I have to upset before this is over? How many more goodbyes do I have to sit through before everyone is satisfied? How many more empty, insincere promises of people never leaving me or wanting me in their life do I have to hear? 😐

I don't care if talking about what's going on with me makes other people uncomfortable. Maybe because they make me uncomfortable. But nobody ever thinks about that, do they? 😐

My other aunt visited my mother yesterday. She brought up her nastiest habit. Disciplining kids as a form of asserting dominance. Never giving a thought to what it would do to them. To how they would be later in life because of it. Thinking it would prevent them from acting out towards her. ...

Time lapsed: 8 hours Amount eaten: 0 I've taken my insulin. I have no intention of eating this or anything else. Sorry.

Fuck you.

Time lapsed: 4 hours Amount eaten: 0 None. Absolutely none. Maybe I should just keep letting it sit there. 😠

See this? I made this. Would you eat this? Would you think i'd let you eat this? Do you think you should get to eat this or something like it? 😐

I'd like to be able to tell some of you fuck your problems, pay attention to MINE for once. Asshole on the street all "This guy probably got a whole family. This n***a can't even say anything." as he passes me by. Whatever. You guys don't care. Fuck off.

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Dark ageplay where you come over and put on cartoons for me and I start crying and you have to hold me because I'm a really sensitive girl and the plot is really dark and intense (it's the episode where two friends have a brief misunderstanding but it's all okay in the end)

I'm not gonna ask for anything, but my mother might need help with some things. Any help with it would be appreciated. I'll make sure she gets it. ko-fi.com/tykecooney

Oof. They had my mother moved onto a clear liquid diet but didn't bring her anything. I got that taken care of, and now she's full of chicken broth and gelatin. 💪😤

My mother's up and walking! They've removed most of what she's hooked up to, and she's using the restroom on her own, so hopefully she'll be on her way out of here before too long. ...The surgeon confirmed that chemo would be likely. They're still waiting on pathology results.

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Just a warning! Don't piss off a wizard!

I know she's still in a lot of pain, but the idea that my mother wants to be able to fart just so she can have a cup of coffee is just VERY typical of her. 🤣

My mother's sitting up in a chair! 🥺💗 ...Still itching like mad though. :<

At home, alone, exhausted and feeling neglected as fuck.

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Confirmed: The cancer is out. They're just waiting on pathology. They want to remove her epidural because it's apparently not relieving her pain. They're gonna ultrasound her abdomen and use a numbing agent on the specific nerves to try and help get her up and moving.

They've got us up right beneath the roof, so my nerves are shot. This window behind me, while not touching the floor, is MASSIVE. I feel like everything is tilted and i'm falling... 😰😵‍💫

Gonna be here at the hospital for a good while, I think. Talk to me. Keep me occupied, huh? ;~;

I had a nightmare, and i've been awake since. Currently i'm having an existential crisis. Yay. 🙁

Anxiety's piling high right now. I wanna answer questions if people got them. Keep me occupied, huh?

Even if you can't give though? A bump would be appreciated. Thanks. 💗

I'm not gonna ask for anything, but my mother might need help with some things. Any help with it would be appreciated. I'll make sure she gets it. ko-fi.com/tykecooney

She made it through. It took six hours. She's in her room now. She looks like Hell, she's resting, but she's alive. ;~;

It's started. She's in.

One more night. I would do anything for her. Even if it cost me my life. She's been through too much, and gotten too little in return. Please, please don't take her. Not yet. Not now...

It's called a whipple procedure. I'm staying with her overnight. She's gonna be very rough after this... God, I hope she'll be okay... ☹️

My mother's surgery is tomorrow. I've never been more terrified of something. 🙁

I went to MonsterCon this weekend for the @usstarvos.org Region 3 @sfi-inc.bsky.social! The mall had a really good turn out!

A picture of the sunset from outside the hospital, taken on the 23rd.

My mother's surgery is scheduled for Tuesday. I can best describe what we're hoping for to be kind of like that part of Fullmetal Alchemist, where Hohenheim punches through Izumi's gut, but more realistic. Let's just hope what they're removing hasn't advanced too much... 😓

At the hospital, waiting on my aunt. One of my mother's co-workers is visiting her. That's nice.

It's very hard not to be spiteful to most of you right now. Very, very difficult. 😐

"I'm sorry for being wrong even though I know i'm right. Please jerk me off as I take a moment to step back and laugh to myself about it." ^Get this dumb shit out of my feed I have more important things to worry about.

More from phone calls she had with the family: -It's right there in the spot where the gallbladder, liver and kidneys all meet. -One possibility mentiomed was reconstructive surgery. Fucking Hell...

Update: The worst case scenario has happened. I don't know how serious it is yet, or what level of treatment is gonna be needed for it. ...Goddamn it, i'm scared.

When I see somebody I know who no longer speaks to me (but DOESN'T have me blocked) pop up in my feed, it makes me sad. Very sad... I'm still here. 🙁

My mother's got a gallbladder obstruction and the doctors are still trying to decide what they're going to do with it. Also my aunt's coming for a visit.

Gonna get started at 7 instead! Sorry for the delay!

Lesson learned: don’t get old, kids. It stinks…