I finally have a day off tomorrow

Get a whistle. Keep it on you at all times. If you see 🧊 do 3 short bursts in sequence. If you see an abduction in progress, 3 long bursts.

The reason theyre trying to redefine pedophile so hard is because they know he is one. 🥰

Look at how cute you are!

Hey

GUI!! LLO!! TINES!! GUI!! LLO!! TINES!! GUI!! LLO!! TINES!!

serious question: are straight people still a thing? follow up question: if so, why?

Playing with mine while looking at yours. I love Fridays 😇😈 #fcf #pierceddick

we have a president who only does good things when everyone calls him a pedophile. our mission for the next 3 years is clear.

How’s everybody holding up?

Happy FCF lovely queerios

Friday Eve or whatever

Happy Thursday to all the lovely queerios in my phone

But what about the Charlie Kirk penny? 😆

Happy Hump Day lovely queerios. In honor of, here’s me watching you doing the nasty 😇😈

Y’all look at how adorable this guy is 😍 hey

You know what’s neat, my lovely queerios? Being mid 50s and still getting blemishes and pimples. I’ve got this fucker coming in on my nose and it hurts like a mufucker. I’ve labeled this with Graphic Media because it’s so horrendous.

Being subversive at work (we technically aren’t allowed graphic t shirts but I’m wearing a coat over this so the rules can suck it). Thanks to @thatbearlifts.bsky.social for the inspo.

Happy Towel Tuesday lovely queerios!

Ok but neither “big dicks” nor “faggotry” are options.

Meet me in the pantry 😜

I think if we cared about friendship the way we care about romance everybody would be like 100x happier

THAT FUCKING HOME ARROW 😤

We have a staff potluck at work this week and I would rather shit in my hands and clap.

Pull up the cuck chair and take more video and pics, probably. Hope to play janitor afterward? 🤷

So your advice is to stay in the brain frying machine to get 20% of the traffic here while enduring constant homophobic abuse? Go on and tell me how follow farming and click bait tweets are going to solve the website being run by a literal nazi who wants to suppress your message. Just #QuitTwitter

The cool weather is settling in, which means all I want to do is hibernate. Alas I have 14 hour work days all week so no deep long sleeps.

Happy Monday lovely queerios. Driving in to work at this time of year gives great views of the Austin skyline. It’s still dark but the sun peeking over the horizon illuminates the skyline. These pics really don’t do the imagery justice.

There’s honest, and then there’s hurtful.

I just watched Woody Harrelson do close up card magic to the hottie host of Hot Wings. My ex could do amazing card tricks. I’m into that shit.

I just saw the most stunningly beautiful man and it made me say “Oh my god” out loud. It’s currently gorgeous outside so my windows are open, and my living room window is close to my neighbor’s patio. I must have been pretty loud because I caused the neighbor’s dog to start barking.

If you see this, quote with a robot that isn't from "Star Wars," "Star Trek," "Doctor Who," or "Transformers."

My kitchen smells amazing right now

I’m more ✨elevated✨ than I expected to be and I’m too fucking high right now to feel any sort of way about it.

About to live on the edge. Send thots and nudes.

Well it’s that time of year, lovely queerios, when I create my annual unhinged Christmas card. Let’s see if the printer will actually print them this year. We’ll see if things like “ACAB”, “FDT”, and “FUCK ICE” will make it through the approval process.

Pics where the person is sitting on a toilet give me the ick

Poor kerning *sad trombone*

GOOD! I’m tired of all this prudish, sex-shaming bullshit. I’m tired of the affiliated religious messaging. The fact you think this is a “gotcha” is just so fucking overdone. I hope he jorks it on the reg, watches furry and piss porn, & gets off watching his neighbors bang his wife.

Ok my Matrix has glitched multiple times over the last 24 hours and I’m not sure what the fuck is happening.

Thanks to the very cute employee at @sirratleather.bsky.social in Austin who sold me the gummy bear funderwear.

I’m at the store. Y’all need anything?

Chat, how do we feel about crop tops on boys with bellies?

Good morning and happy Saturday lovely queerios, especially you lovely Texas queerios. If you’re so inclined and able, consider a donation. 🧡

Favorite Robot Chicken episodes: •Gummy Bear •Stormtrooper. Stormtrooper. Stormtrooper. •Cuntface

Post gardening belly! Its getting bigger and im kinda into it. 🥰 #MCM

Just a pinch 🤏

I need a nap