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My soul cries out for the many cultures whose polytheistic religions were broken down in the name of that one war god y’all think created everything..

Yall will never have to worry about me turning my back on this girl!! #Lucy

Do y’all remember Bad Bad Leroy Brown? The baddest man in the whole damned town? Badder than old King Kong? And meaner than a junkyard dog?

Sometimes when people talk to me about their interests, I’m like how fucking dare you?

Yall what the fuck am i gonna do when my nephews are like 4 and 6 and my sister wants me to take them for the day like that’s gonna be so stressful

Son, these taters are dry as a bone

If only i had tortilla chips I would eight million percent be making rotel dip right this instant

Like I’m really sorry, friend, but maybe it’s you that’s not ready for it and not me.

“Not all (fill in the blank)…” yeah bitch I know and that’s kind of implicit in any conversation allowing nuance and you interjecting with your worthless whataboutism demonstrates to me that you aren’t prepared to handle that despite your evidently baseless confidence in yourself. I’m uninterested!

If I ever say something harsh that could by some stretch of the imagination be interpreted to be about you - but you and I both know that it’s NOT about you, I’m gonna ask you to go ahead and not internalize said comments and move along because I said what I said about the people who I said it about

The company i work for is having me read contracts for ai companies in turkey and poland

Behind-the-scenes look at Jessica Simpson in the studio bringing the Chicken of the Sea Jingle to life. 📸: Jason Nguyen

I dont care how much yall think I am trash, you havent lived until you’ve sprinkled some curry powder and melted a kraft single in your ramen

And also, I would be lying if I said that people who do believe in an organized religion, do not have an uphill battle in earning my respect.

To be brutally honest, I don’t respect any religion, period. I do respect a handful of people that have yet to deconstruct organized religion, or do not care to deconstruct organized religion. But I do not respect organized religion. Not a single one of them. And you cannot fucking make me.

“Shareholders” is a concept that should not exist. Companies should be owned by the people who work there - full stop.

One positive about my dad living within walking distance of me is that he mows my lawn for free, but I have to say that a downside is that a second ago he just walked up to the window of my office room unannounced while I was watching filthy gay porn.

I wonder if TikTok knows that I am never ever ever ever gonna be interested in using their shitty little artificial intelligence google lens fuck ass feature where you can shop for shit you see in a video

I bet you i could get 37 hours of sleep on this bed

me when i corner the enemy teams iron fist in rivals

Ma’am, I don’t mean to insult you, but I have to tell you that you have the saggiest pair of titties I’ve ever seen

I just remembered that Chuck E. Cheese‘s full name is Charles “Entertainment” Cheese.

Adroit is not giving the energy of a word which is a real word

I would like to know if anyone still regularly uses a snuggie

Only the real ones know of the Shirley Temple Little Darling DVD collection

Form a four Pokémon team using Pokemon whose names begin with the first letter of your name 🩷

My sister aint got an ounce of sense

Sometimes it really be the number one Wizard 101 evangelist in all of North America that when asked if they would play Wizard 101 with you on Switch flat out refuses…

How nasty can I make my disposition and thereby my entire existence in this nasty life in response to the nasty ongoings?

Starting my day off with positivity - one thing I absolutely LOVE to see is a man in his teeny tiny little briefs.

Just half a dozen, nothing crazy!!!

It’s time for some ten pm mozzarella sticks

My future partner needs to be a little fat or at least have a fat ass because my cats need something to make biscuits on.

Yall were not lying about that boy’s ass in heated rivalry i need a minute

This is fucking sending me!!!!!

There is a BL isekai anime this season I’m squealing

I’m about to singlehandedly end the moratorium on selling puss

The youtube advertisement situation has officially gotten out of hand

“And I got to thinking, after I left and after I apologized, because I thought it was very sincere of me, that it was a crock of shit.”

Are you #TeamPellapir?!

Girl I know twinks aren’t normally in the “trade of the season” conversation for contextual reasons but how are we gonna pretend like Nini Coco isn’t an INCREDIBLY conventionally attractive man? Like I have such a crush and that boyyyy 🫩😩🫡🤭 what i wouldnt dooooo. i fear im a lost cause. Please help!

I’m kinda surprised that no one has licensed their characters to the jackbox games so that their characters could be represented in their games but maybe jackbox isn’t interested for some reason

My aunts and uncles tried to unreasonably play with my money today and all I can think of is as if I needed another reason to dislike boomers. Just know they tried it.

And if you see me ordering dominos at 9pm know that there is an at least 33% chance @majesticmilotic.bsky.social influenced me

WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I AM? YOU AINT MARRIED TO NO AVERAGE BITCH BOY!

If Pickled were in team MAGIC from Grey’s Anatomy I think a lot of people would think he’s Christina but really he’s Izzy boots

Working in office today

If a “straight” man has obvious sex addiction coupled with misogynistic/womanizing tendencies, there is a 100% chance he is gay or bisexual, etc. At this point, it’s not even painting with broad brushstrokes, it’s just a matter of fact and I have lived too much life to be convinced otherwise.