Thinking of finally signing up for TikTok now because I feel much better about Americans stealing my data.

Sharpie shortage blamed on Epstein files.

President signs executive order declaring that Wednesdays are now to be called Trumpday

“I declare the airspace in my head officially off limits!”

MTG finds her soul while Trump fires up a new bromance with Mamdani. Somethin’s happen in’ here. What it is ain’t exactly clear.

Why do I get the feeling that when the Epstein files are released, it will be like Geraldo Rivera opening Al Capone’s safe and finding an empty bag of Cheetos?

Did he just say Epsteinamitaphen?

Unless someone asks you for it, if you start a sentence with, “In my humble opinion,” there is no humility in it. IMHO

MATTHEW 7 Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit.

EXECUTIVE ORDER SIGNED MAKING PLUTO A PLANET AGAIN

Headlines of the future: Hypertension Rates Plummet Due to Tariff Driven Coffee Price Hikes RFK Credits MAHA Policies For Reduction in Coffee Consumption.

Murdoch Suing Trump for Poaching Employees

Trump Wanders Roof of White House Amidst Reporters Yells of, “Jump!”

If we got rid of the electoral college, all this gerrymandering would go right out the door with it.

“Purely financial.” Riiighht… Yes, "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert" is ending. CBS announced that the show, and the "Late Show" franchise entirely, will conclude in May 2026. CBS stated that the decision is "purely a financial decision against a challenging backdrop in late night" programming.

Of course they are hot. If they were cold it would defeat the purpose.

To see the true cost of being MAGA and how great America could be without it, go to www.facebook.com/share/p/14Er...

@denofcinema.bsky.social your friends on the social media platform you are boycotting are demanding you come back to the dark side and we are ready to stage a kidnap/intervention.

RIP Ted Kotcheff, director of Weekend at Bernie’s. Here’s to another 5 years of film making. See you at the party tomorrow night. Props to you.

Is Karoline Leavitt Baron Trump’s older girlfriend?

Coming soon to a theater near you ritualbike.com

Come on down to the White House Tesla Auto Mall!

Well he did say that he would bring prices down on day one. We just didn’t realize it was going to be Fortune 500 share prices.

StarLink is poised to take over a $2.8 billion FAA contract from Verizon. Because of Starlink’s month-to-month options?

Cartel leaders mull setting up headquarters in border states as Trump floats $5 million 'gold card' as a route to US citizenship

The new definition of fraud: Taking my tax money designated to help the thirsty and buying them a Pepsi instead of a Coke.

The self declared “Dictator on Day One” accuses the President of Ukraine of being a dictator. That’s rich!

You will always be a New York reject and will never be accepted there. There is nothing you will ever do to change that, you taunting fool.

Elmer Fudd nailing his RFK impersonation. youtu.be/uM8h22DeTbA

Waiting to see how long it will take for Hegseth to don the lampshade

TikTok back online in a hostages for data swap

$88 billion to deport 1 million immigrants. That is a cost of $88,000 to deport 1 single immigrant. Our tax dollars at work.

Trumps gift to Biden: Covid… Biden’s gift to Trump: California wildfires. ….The white elephant gift exchange from hell.

Looking forward to Jack Smith’s upcoming book, “If He Did It.”

But seriously, Trump needs to build a big beautiful wall of gigantic fans along the foothills to blow back the winds in the opposite direction.

It’s going to be hard to bring down grocery prices. How do you like them apples.

Where in the world is Matt Lauer?

Under counsel from Elon and Vivek, Trump considers using interns to fill remaining cabinet posts. Gaetz applauds.