Mac McAnally is touring here again and I'm very sorry to this man but I just cannot handle his name

Seeing "news" that they got 50k people to sign a petition to replace Bad Bunny with George Strait. There are over 250,000,000 adults in the United States. Congrats on getting .02% of the people to agree with you, really fucking impressive.

In the lobby before a show and they need to talk to people in the first 4 rows so they keep asking people that as they come in the door and people are going "I dunno... Row O????" Do we not know how seating rows typically work or do we not know the alphabet?

just realized from this thumbnail that my Blackbeard costume is also basically a Mantzoukas costume, I just don't need to put on all the tattoos.

LA people, have you ever driven to Palm Springs? Would that drive from a direct flight to LA be better than flying CLE to DEN to Palm Springs?

Looks fucking smug about it too

Nothing worse than writing someone an email and getting a "can you call me?" in return

Trying to pick a song to do a Halloween twerk workshop and Black Widow hits but I just feel like I CANNOT use Iggy Azalea

Apparently someone in my neighborhood ordered root beer, Fanta, and an energy drink from 711 last night and had it delivered and it's been on my porch since

most of my stuff from my old phone carried over just fine but i still get irritated out of proportion when i have to try to get back into some app i haven't thought about my info for in years

truly in disbelief that if your phone is broken, you cannot log into the website that would help you with your phone being broken

my phone is dead, so i went to log in on the Verizon website but you have to fucking get a notification sent to your PHONE to log in on the website, so how the fuck am I supposed to do that?!?!?!?!

omg i keep putting holds on new books thinking it'll take awhile to get them and then they instantly come in and now i have like 5 freaking books to read

Was just outside for maybe ten minutes and now have 10,000 bug bites

Got American instead of cheddar on my bagel sando and it was really the wrong move. It's perfect on a McDonald's one but for a real one it is NOT

Silk Sonic should make more music.

my milkshake brings all the poor, clinically depressed boys to the yard

Opened my freezer and I have chicken sausage patties, pork sausage links, and brats in there and my brain went "sausaaaaaaaage" to the 'tune' of MUSTAAAAAARD

Get you a group chat where you send the worst possible pictures of yourself

Was checking the expiration date on my milk and had to think about what day it was... Literally forgot.

Bought a couple of greeting cards from a local shop and they've been emailing me asking me to review the products. I'm not writing a review for a card!! There's not really a way for a card to malfunction!!

Even though I know and have known that Andrew Garfield is British, my brain refuses to accept it and breaks every time I hear him speak in his regular voice

one more day til Casaaaaaaa Bonitaaaaaaa

Walked into the bathroom, turned my straightener on. Wasn't plugged in. Plugged it in, walked away for a second, went to use it, not hot bc I didn't turn it on after I actually plugged it in. Firing on all cylinders here.

a student really just wrote in that they went to bed late so are tired and want to be excused from class

Watching Love is Blind UK and this episode really just ended with a man saying "I have to trust my spleen..."

I hate that I have to pretend I'm going to order food just to see any restaurant's menu now

the dude at Dunkin put my frosted donuts frosting side down in the bag but he seemed like possibly the most depressed person i've ever seen so i'm not going to complain. please clap.

Doctor's office: you have an 11am appointment but be here by 1045 and we're gonna text you immediately to make sure you are Doctor: lol whatever see you when I see you

Just saved something I spent like an hour on as a CSV instead of an XLSX and so now everything is basically lost ☠️

Huge pet peeve at work: students emailing me to ask if they have to go to something. Do you think we scheduled this for you not to go to it?! YES YOU HAVE TO GO

Sometimes I get random ads for nail polish and without the word nail in front, I always read it as Polish. Polish Party? Sounds good...ohhhhh nevermind

So did Snoop just now complain about a movie from 3 years ago or did people suddenly decide to start talking about it for some reason

Went to Taco Bell and as the kid hands me my food he says "would you believe the guy behind you ordered the exact same thing?" And I'm like "even no tomatoes?" Yes. I'm like "is it my soul mate???"

TIL there's a line dance to Cotton Eye Joe and I was fine not having this information

eating a york peppermint patty to try to get a sensation

Leave it to Lil Nas X to get arrested for code section 69

so THAT's why these jeans are fitting so weird

there's a new giraffe calf at our zoo it's really fun to say giraffe calf

A student just came in to talk to the registrar and said "I got a Taco Bell scholarship..." and then had to pause while she laughed because what a weird thing to exist (good for him, though, and for Taco Bell for doing that, apparently?)

just saw a Macy Gray cover of Creep and i love that song so much by seemingly anyone but Radiohead themselves

the registrar is on a zoom meeting. she is in her office with the door closed. i can still hear it like i'm on it myself.

My city was supposedly just ranked #2 most affordable housing market in the world. The WORLD?! Guess I'm definitely never buying a fucking house!

Why does this Pokemon look like a butt with little legs sticking out of a ruffled skirt

I'm ready for Dubai chocolate's fifteen minutes of fame to be over

I wish Mel Gibson wasn't a piece of shit bc he was so cute and hot in the late 90s early 00s

if anyone was curious, I bought Assassin's Creed Syndicate and Sonic Mania bc they were like $10/15 each and seem up my alley.

Got a Switch 2 and finally re-setup my PS4. Hit me with your recs! I liked all the Arkhams and the Italian Assassin's Creeds... Also Animal Crossing and Pokemon stuff...

Y'all need anything, I'm going to the

got one of those automated "time to bring your car in for service!" emails while I'm sitting in the waiting room while they work on my car...