Remembering how McDonald’s brought back Uncle O’Grimacey to try and make the shamrock shake the next grimace shake and it didn’t work

You made this mountain out of a molehill now die on it

There is a 1 week period in February in which the sweethearts candy, the shamrock shake, and Cadbury eggs are all available for purchase, and that one week period is when I am at my happiest because all my favorite seasonal slop is available.

I had a dream that if you listen to a specific song enough times, Spotify uses your phone’s flashlight and projects a hologram of the band/artist performing the song in your room

Imagine being Scott Cawthon finding out the most notorious pedophile ever gooned to futa of your characters

Tartar sauce🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

“Call me gulliver the way I be traveling.” -guy who thinks dribbling is an optional part of basketball

We are Charlie Kirk & What is This Diddy Blud Doing on the Calculator in the Gen Z Everywhere at the End of Time.

Braces gotta be top 10 worst inventions, I don’t care if my teeth need them, I want to eat pistachios.

The year is 2471, you are doing the last ever wordle, it is “thank.” Credits roll as they announce Wordle: The Movie

" all your cheeze or your life!" here we have a little outlaw rodent I drew before christmas but didn't get around to finish before now.

We need more media blending fantasy & the modern world cause imagine a heist movie set in a 21st century bank but all the robbers look like this and are using spells

Elect me as the next president and I will enact the “Linkin Park Act” making it so that anyone with the last name Park must name their first born Lincoln or face the death penalty. I will immediately resign from office after this bill is signed into law.

X is a scam made up by Y to sell more Z

Can’t wait for Gen Z to be reaching our 80s & 90s and for someone to release a new version of “Everywhere at the End of Time” featuring an old lyricless version of Hot To Go as one of the songs

At least once a week at work I hear the flee the facility computer hacking sound & it activates my fight or flight every time

My body does not run on blood it runs on Shamrock Shakes

I Photoshop Paddington into a movie, TV show, or pop culture until I forget: Day 1746

Dropping off my son at school

Epstein list? You mean the pedo files?

That olive oil won’t be extra virgin when I’m done with it

I desperately need Dune 3 to outdo Doomsday

can we trade

If alpha & beta are the first two letters of the Greek alphabet, does this mean saying “the alphabet” is just a fancier way of saying “the ABCs”?

Noobnouns vs pronouns vs hackernouns

Pumpkin Spice is a scam made up by Big Autumn to sell more Pumpkin

Someone told me th intro of Pumped Up Kicks sounds like someone saying “Krabby Patty” several times and I haven’t unheard it

Ngl I love when musicians make witnessing their events more accessible like this

Man Who Thought Fleetwood Mac’s ‘The Chain’ Was Over In For Thrill Of His Fucking Life https://theonion.com/man-who-thought-fleetwood-macs-the-chain-was-over-in-for-thrill-of-his-fucking-life/

The song grandma got run over by a reindeer is lowkey tragic when you strip away the candy cane coating of the lyrics

If I see another southern holding a confederate flag saying it’s not racist, it’s just their heritage, I’m going to burn their flag and say it’s my heritage, New England (and the rest of the north I guess) 🔛🔝 forever.

This pic goes HARDER! 🔥🔥🔥

Hate the new Walmart Christmas ads where instead of Santa Claus & the elves & the North Pole they have the grinch & The whos & whoville for reasons I do not understand.

On the 7th day of rizzmas, Kai Cenat gave to me 7 bottles of mustard, 6 munting mangoes, 5 blumpkins!!!

Goat Simulator has permanently altered my perception of reality

Call me a capitalist the way I love bread

New AI brain chip can do literally everything your brain already can and nothing more! Now you don’t even have to type a ChatGPT prompt, ChatGPT can both think up and answer the prompt for you!

Labubu movie vs skibidi toilet movie vs Toy Story 6 or 7 for best picture 2028

A ‘LABUBU’ movie is in the works at Sony. (Source: www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie...)

Looking at Amazon Music’s “My Discovery Mix” feels like when a parent says “I know everything about you!” And then “everything” is exclusively shit from when you were twelve.

Chat am I trippin or do strawberries thatve been sitting in the fridge for a week taste like the smell of gasoline at the gas station?

All I want for Christmas is the return of physical media on a large scale.

Went to 5 Below

Flying Squirrel Loves It Every Time

Making Hot Pockets in the break room microwave should be a war crime ngl

Driving with one of them fancy shape glasses & telling the cop I thought the red light was a Christmas light

Breaking: Sony considering adding new tiers to PlayStation+, these tiers would be called “PlayStation-“ and “PlayStation”. Rumor has it, “PlayStation-“ is free, and “PlayStation” is required for the console to actually function, and will cost 30 bucks a year.

Me at the first part: haha hell yeah Me at the second part: countries just do this what the fuck

A Hollywood couple will split and everyone will be like “who could have seen this coming?” As if they didn’t start dating when one of them was 17 and the other was 38