If 15 year old girls aren't kids why can't they vote

Fun fact, you can actually get pregnant from watching this enough times and the baby will grow up to be weapons-grade hot

Patti Smith handed MY PERSONAL CHILD tonight's set list so I guess if I die tonight at least I went out on a high note

Like I'm quite likely to not get to see my fucking family at Thanksgiving because of this BS and I DON'T CARE. Keep the government closed, this is on Republicans and everyone knows it

Find your senators at reps.fyi or call 202-224-3121

I called my congressional representatives and you can too.

My kid just had maybe her best basketball game in her short and undistinguished career and I totally get why parents of excellent athletes act a little crazy about it. It's wild when your kid's kickin ass

One of the most useful mom skills I learned as a kid was how to make kids' chopsticks with a hair tie and the wrapper from a disposable chopstick set. Why doesn't everyone know how to do this

Wild reading Peter Pan to children. What a book and so interesting how differently we react to it

I am absolutely not on a roll on LinkedIn

Thank you #kexp Halloween show, my children keep requesting Tom Waits "What's He Building?" in the car and giggling about it

My kindergartner recently decided she is simply not going to touch a wet car ever again and make adults do it for her. Rough as we head into PNW winter but I'll admit I respect it. Wet cars do feel bad

I completely can. I want this good news firehouse to just keep running

Unexpected

Wow it turns out the entire country is not permanently reactionary because Trump won an election by 1.5%

“Our Flag Means Death” and “Star Trek: Lower Decks”

My kid is designing a multi programming language text editor in his head and no matter how much I interrupt him he won't stop monologuing at me about the syntax of the config language

Sorry to all American dogs today, I know it's an anxious one for you as it begins to sink in that your family is going to feed you an hour late for every meal for the rest of your natural life, it wasn't just yesterday

You're taking the curl out of my naturally curly hair

Welp

Came right off a regional kendo tournament with a series of unlikely mishaps where a Canadian team beat a Californian team to end the night right into whatever the hell this is

My kids all went trick or treating as things my mom hasn't heard of this year

If I were Usha I'd be staying with him out of spite. He's clearly trying to get her to leave him. GIRL, MAKE HIM LEAVE YOU, GO SCORCHED EARTH WHEN HE DOES

You know what, I've actually gotten kinda good at carving pumpkins

Am I in trouble with the jazz police?

12yo singing "Winnie the Pooh, Winnie the Pooh, he's a weird bear who makes weird decisions" as she got out of the car this morning

Explaining performative middle school math underperformance to my queer, probably neurodivergent kid "look this is just a thing straight girls do, I know it's weird, you don't have to do it" like I'm some kind of authority on straight girls then having to make the same explanation to my husband

My kids call their dad's cousins auntie? It's completely normal??

Praying cooler heads will prevail in the drunk and sleepy traffic leaving Dodger Stadium right now

Preach

Give me a condor’s quill! Give me Vesuvius’ crater for an inkstand! Friends, hold my arms!

Fkn metal

You're allowed to get a tattoo impulsively and not know what it means but think it looks cool. But man once someone tells you it's a Nazi thing you check if they're right and if they are you gotta get it taken off your body. It's not complicated

Having a quick consultation with the Sandwich Bros

Last night as we were going to bed I was like "pretty wild Trump is just, demolishing the white house" and my partner was like "yup" and then we went to sleep. But then I woke up 2 hours before my alarm and couldn't get back to sleep again

For her birthday breakfast my youngest has officially requested "just a big spoonful of peanut butter"

Five year old all "I'm gonna look sooo good in this outfit" as she lays it out for school in the morning

You work here long enough you move past the fear that comes from understanding the frailty of human life and replace it with taking joy in the small things that make life worth living.

Who robbed the Louvre right answers only

Essence of ghost was even better than I remembered it

Man kendo is so great like 85% of the time and the other 15% either I fuck up my knee or someone bruises the living shit out of my right arm. Icing that arm now 😩😩

Seattle, what a town. Where else can you drive right into a freeways vagina

Being the mostly-closeted-pansexual-in-apparently-het-marriage mom of a queer child is a trip.

im immune to LLMs because the Internet has already driven me insane in every possible way

Dr. Money Gettingpaid, PhD

Absolutely gorgeous day Seattle. Well done

Had dreams about driving around for hours last night then woke up and guess what I did

The Hobbit is such a great book

I am feeling hoarse and was like "oh no another cold" and then I remembered I was trying to sing along to a Dusty Springfield album on the way home from Snohomish. That'll do it too I guess