A book trailer? For me? Dead Men Don’t Sing is going on submission! Exciting times. Editors I can’t wait for you to meet Charlie Brisbane. Cheers🍸 💋 🕵️ #deadmendontsing Trailer credit: the wonderful @alessandraranelli.bsky.social

Introducing The Killer Twist Pitch Prize for Unagented Crime Writers! Top Prize: 4-Day Pass #TheakstonsCrime + 3-night hotel stay in #Harrogate, Pitch Revision & Coaching. (a $1250 value) 2nd Place: @JerichoWriters Agent 1-on-1! T&Cs apply, See www.alessandraranelli.com/prize for details.🧵1/4

FYI film fans you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/sa...

My son: I don’t want to go to school. Also my son: *plays 8 hours of a computer game exploring Hogwarts and going to classes - on the weekend*

Reddit is the KFC of social media. Every few years you give it a go and are immediately reminded why it’s bad.

"Price rises are at their lowest for a year" is not the flex they think it is.

I’d pay to sit in a cinema for 6 hours and watch behind the scenes footage of that mug shot.

Maybe today’s the day I buy those Instagram T-shirts that make me look thin and cool

Weird how both the Michael Jordan and the Arnold Schwarzenegger documentaries make me think the same thing: cigars are cool as fuck and I want to smoke cigars.

my back, two minutes into sitting, standing, or laying down

Sometimes I wonder how it’s going with that giant mirror city wall in the desert.

Writing advice for self: don’t use the word nonplussed. You don’t know what it means. No one else does either.

My pomodoro technique is to write 8 words, delete most of them, then watch YouTube for 3 hours

Favourite joke format? More like schmavourite moke porfat.