My girl friend from grad school was telling me how her and her husband got a babysitter one random Saturday so they could catch up on tv. That’s real as fuck. 😂

Happy Birthday boo @xavierdleau.com! Welcome to the 40 club!

They got Ponytail cranking out project after project like she Rihanna. 😭

Every time the bass kicks in on the car speakers on “Call Me Back” by Kehlani + T-Pain:

I AIN'T GOING BACK AND FORTH TONIGHT I'M GOING OUT! SO DON'T YOU START THAT SHIT WHEN I GET HOOOME!

I think I made like $8/hr when I was a day camp counselor in 2004.

Because they still want and seek companionship with men, a lot of women don’t want to accept the fact that straight men simply hate them. It’s easier to blame men’s wrongdoings on them being gay and not into women versus accepting they just don’t like or respect you.

So wassup?!?

That part in “THIQUE” when Beyoncé turns into Tinashe >>>>>

Brit driving by is sending meeeeeeee! 😭

My favorite thing about this music video is that all the dresses look like they came from Wet Seal or Charlotte Russe.

Baby, Kehlani ate DOWN with this new album!!

Let me go roll this blunt real quick!

I need some butt real bad.

🗣️ IT’S GUCCI!!! February 12th. ♒️

Also, they better not play in my girls face this season because this is a winner baby!!! #DragRace

A'keria, Morphine, Kennedy, Jasmine, Morgan all on the same season? These lip-syncs are about to be a kii this season! #DragRace

Progressive is about to get cussed out today! I got into an accident on 4/10 and had my car towed to the body shop cause it wasn't drivable. It's now 4/20 and my car is still sitting at the body shop waiting for them to approve the claim. Mind you, I can't get a rental until they do...

I guess I need to understand what you mean by major crisis? I've been unemployed for 10 months now and most people would say that's a major crisis and I shouldn't be dating. I've been anyway and with somewhat more success and enjoyment than when I was fully employed. 😅

Yep! Between middle school and high school I dissected a frog, pig, cat, shark, starfish, earthworm and a few others. When I got to college (I was a zoology major when I first started) we dissected a cow eye and then had to assist in fitting a cannula on an actual living cow.

Working from home in your underwear all day >>>

Wash Day. 🪮🪮

The new Tyla x Zara song is cute but it needed a bridge real bad. I feel that way about most of Tyla's songs, they're fun but never go anywhere or reach a true peak. Zara ate her vocals up, per usual.

I cannot believe people still use vaseline for anything having to do with jacking off or penetrative sex. 😵‍💫

These companies have no problem yanking those payments out of your account as soon as the clock strikes midnight on the due date. Now when its time for them to pay me, I gotta wait 7-10 business days AFTER the end of the festival to get paid out for selling my Coachella pass.

I was so tight, right, slim and trim when we were all stuck in the house in 2020. 😭

There’s a reason all that steam be radiating off they heads in the winter. 🤭

Y’all be so fine!

Got damn. 🫠😮‍💨

I am big

Eating butt and making them nut hands free.

Absolutely absurd salary range. I made close to that range in my first corporate job out of undergrad and I was in the upper midwest. Offering that in LA is ridiculous.

So #MarvelRivals didn't need to give Black Cat that stolen magical artifacts angle to make her a formidable addition to the game. Between her already established ability to manipulate bad luck, retractable claws and then all her gadgets (grapnel, electromagnetic lenses etc.) she didn't need it.

I've known about that Usher/Chris Brown tour since late last year and I still don't understand why Usher Raymond would agree to do it. Going on tour with Fistopher Brown does absolutely nothing positive for Usher and his brand and only benefits that tumbling crackhead's image.

🌕🌗🌑

IF YOU'RE IN LINE TO ATTACK SAM ALTMAN'S HOUSE STAY IN LINE!!!

Any ending for tonights LaLaPaRuza other than a Mia Starr vs Juicy final battle will be deeply unserious. #DragRace

Brand & Product Manager I'm good at bringing a human-centered design approach to my work. For brand, that means marketing that actually innovates and centers connecting to the audience. For product, it means building what consumers truly want rather than what the company assumes they need.

I decided I didn't want to go to Coachella this weekend so I put my pass up on the official resell site for $300 over what I originally paid. That thang sold in 30 minutes!

Well, I guess I am getting to that age - got our first divorce of the friend group. 😭

I replaced my broken iPhone screen and battery all by myself…

While I’m greatly appreciative of recruiters being proactive in reaching out about job opportunities, why are you blowing up my phone at 7AM asking to talk about a job opportunity?!?

The battery in my iPhone "pillowed" last Thursday so I've been without a phone since then until my replacement parts arrive today. Thankfully, I have an Apple Watch with cell service, an iPad and MacBook but sheesh if you don't have any of those you're fucked. You can't do shit!

You cannot convince me that Roxas and @infern0ant.blacksky.app aren’t twins separated at birth. 🤣

I’m still up. 🥴

Two-hundred and sixty-five days? Where the hell that bitch live at??

I spent over an hour in Wal-Mart shopping just to get up to checkout and realize I didn’t have my wallet and they don’t accept Apple Pay. The way I left that cart sitting in the frozen food section and huffed and puffed outta that store. I was hot!

Once you start eating chicken thighs you won’t even want a chicken breast in your general vicinity. Like, no thank you!

So Naomi Scott released a fire ass pop album you guys! It’s sooo good!