Local Woman Visits Different Location of Local Supermarket Chain

My husband and I guessed in unison that coconut water can be used as a blood plasma substitute therefore convincing the trivia team it was correct and winning the whole game by being so annoyingly married

Thinking about this for no particular reason

They should invent a meme format that will fix me

The thing I hate about basketball is it seems like it should be easier than it is. Like if you're good at it. Everyone who does it should be better at it than they are.

A cat getting off my lap could fix me

Stayed tuned for the gender reveal of our new city-provided tree!

Just putting it out there that it would be awesome if someone bought a house for my best friend so we could be neighbors, it's in Cleveland so as far as houses go it's not even THAT much money, lmk!

This online writing class I'm taking actually expects me to write in the very first lesson, can you even IMAGINE, like you haven't even taught me anything yet

Someone should invent savory dessert

Husband and I both have sore spots in our right shoulders that we wanted massaged so we just did what I am calling "a 69 but for shoulders"

Why stop at an hour? Have some fun with it. Turn your clocks back 6 hours. A whole day. Light your clocks on fire. Incinerate time. Do your part to unmake the universe.

He's seen how you die. Whether you want to know your fate or wish to remain unburdened, the cost is the same-- treats plz

Great idea- Hinder's "Lips of an Angel" on kazoo at a funeral

Is there a vertigo that is for too sideways?

Keeping a carton of veggie broth in my purse in case I get thirsty (savory)

Things are finally starting to look up for me but all the bad energy still needs an outlet and that outlet is every single red light in existence, especially the very long ones. This is an acceptable trade-off.

@wesleywatts.bsky.social spotted in the wild (my mother-in-law's house)

I got a job despite a massive employment gap just by babbling at the hiring manager about all the neat little things I've been learning from free workshops at the library

Every time I list "time management" as a skill on a job application it becomes a bigger lie.

"Died of dried mango poisoning" has really risen in the ranks for ways I might go out

Hey chat what's the best way to lift just like a regular curse

Another stint in Dummy Jail

I know who's NOT getting raptured today

@heavydishongry.bsky.social are you writing these?

In your house do you have the toilet paper going over the roll or under? Or a secret third thing

I'm just going to say it, I think we've been letting bananas get away with it for too long

The crossover I didn't know I needed, @literarycleveland.bsky.social and @neorsd.org at Inkubator!

Despite decades of evidence suggesting otherwise, I still think I can multitask while cooking, but thanks to advancements in tortilla transplant science my breakfast burrito is going to pull through

Working on a new superstition, it's about eggs, it shows some real promise. Needs further testing. I have my best people on it.

🎶Saaaaving aaaalllllll my love (hot takes) for yooooou (the group chat)🎶

Today's outfit inspo is orphan from the 1982 movie musical Annie and not even one of the good orphans

Applying for a job in the ~fashion industry~ while dressed in a style I like to call Temu Lularoe

Starting to worry that watching YouTube explainer videos of Tiktok drama is the new asking Jeeves to Google something

I've had a song stuck in my head for days and my usual trick of a Gilligan's Island Theme/Amazing Grace mashup isn't doing the trick, send help (and common metre)

Let me consult the Oracle... (whispering) Yeah she says fuck this

Someone should invent a version of all the plants I want that my cats won't make it their sole objective to eat

Procrastinating on writing by subjecting myself to human rights violations (yard work)

User name checks out

@terselyverbose.bsky.social It is Thursday and you are supposed to be writing and I have the directest of lines to The Motivator so I'm just checking in real quick

Reskeet with a tweet you still think about

Today a man approached me at a bus stop, handed me a flower he had just picked off a nearby bush, and asked me for a dollar. When I told him (truthfully! and apologetically!) that I didn't have any cash, he took the flower back and left.

Finally got around to hanging the propagation station that @aliencg.com got me for Christmas, just spreading that holiday joy through the year, THANK YOU I LOVE IT!

Those bastards killed the chalupa

I had to say goodbye to my favorite cat yesterday, my most handsomb young man, the best birthday present ever, and I always use his name as my starter word Wordle 1,504 2/6 ⬛🟩🟩⬛🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

503 words down, 44,446 to go to get to where I am on First Draft Prime Everything is cool and normal, I am fine, this probably isn't about other stuff

It's not "starting my novel over" it's "starting a side project that just happens to be an AU of my novel"

In the less than five minutes between getting on the bus and getting off the bus I witnessed the bus driver and an old lady get in a yelling fight and then call a truce, you would never get a full storyline beginning to end like this driving in a car, support public transit

Firmware update made my printer stop recognizing my ink and I fixed it ALMOST all by myself with only the tiniest little assist from Computer Husband!

Magic 8 ball, the original AI