This 🧵. All of this.

Big news: I have been selected for the New Zealand Olympic Cynicism team! Apparently rolling my eyes and saying "yeah, whatever" when the selector called round gave me the last point I needed to qualify. LA 2028 (if it's not a smoking, radioactive ruin by then) here I come!

How did I miss that the Alliance Party was back?

The US Supreme Court has decided it's cool to psychologically torture trans kids again with conversion "therapy" and Israel has escalated their apartheid to 'legally'(but actually war crime-ily) murdering Palestinians they detain. The world is a bit shit right now.

I watched Eddington and now it feels like I've just woken up confused from a fever dream.

My eyeballs will absolutely not support JK Rowling's evil crusade against trans people.

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If you joined InternetNZ last year to stop the hostile takeover by the FSU, here's a reminder to renew your membership before the end of the month. Rumour has it the FSU may be attempting another takeover attempt Internetnz.nz

It's pretty funny that Grenon has to read this on his own platform. Media Insider: ‘Wholly unsuccessful’ - five key points in the Julian Batchelor v TVNZ defamation case; will Jim Grenon have to help pay costs? www.nzherald.co.nz/business/med... archive.ph/L63U9

Click on the link to donate #nzpol “We want this story to empower communities affected by racism and state violence as well as inspiring our wider audience too. We want our audience to feel steadfast in the global fight for Palestinian liberation. We know that our film can change hearts and minds.”

It's been legally confirmed that Julian Batchelor is a complete loser. Julian Batchelor 'wholly unsuccessful' in defamation claim against TVNZ www.stuff.co.nz/nz-news/3609...

Bye 👋 ACT Party deputy and minister Brooke van Velden retires from politics www.rnz.co.nz/news/politic...

It would be so terrifying to land and then see a fire truck right in your path on the runway. Those poor pilots.

In light of the news that Ngaro will be standing for NZ First at this years election, I'm taking this 2023 article out from behind the paywall. Ngaro previously led the Christian Nationalist Party 'NewZeal' after leaving National www.feijoadispatch.nz/p/the-christ...

Chuck Norris has died and a million memes just died with him.

"I invite people to consider one thing: that violence rarely appears without warning. It whispers first – in speeches, in comment sections, in policies that quietly divide people into “us” and “them”. " thespinoff.co.nz/society/15-0...

The greyhound racing industry trying to save itself by implying your own pet pups will die from a lack of dog blood donations is pretty low. If more dog blood donors are needed, do a campaign like they do for humans. 🤦‍♀️

The hate is definitely rising again. Destiny Church preaching exclusion and marching it too, white supremacist groups with 'remigration', and every Facebook-comment-section-Joe who's decided it's antisemitic not to hate Muslims. Remember March 15. We HAVE to do better. www.rnz.co.nz/news/nationa...

Every right-wing male paying eleventy million dollars to fill up their unnecessarily aggressive looking 1.5 parking space taking up wankwagons - (in a small, unvoiced corner of their little minds): Maybe we should have listened to the greenies

Now would be a really good time for aliens to show up and teleport every single gun, missile and bomb on Earth into the sun.

The real lesson of the second Covid-19 inquiry? We live in a post-truth world thespinoff.co.nz/politics/11-...

Prepare for meltdowns from any VFF or similar people in your life. I think they genuinely convinced themselves the phase 2 report was going to prove them right. Reader, it did not.

You, in another decade So misunderstood and holding feelings and ideas way too big for the real world... in other words, a typical teenager 😂

How long before there's a Polymarket on Mojtaba Khamenei's life expectancy?

At a time of global crisis with implications for every nation, the PM has refused to go on Q+A to talk about it.

Today I learned: You should probably pull the drum out of your washing machine and give it a scrub more often than every 13 years. Ew. 🙃

The problem with freestyling your cooking without being a professional is when you make something orgasmically good, you'll never be able to do it again because you don't remember what exactly went in there or in what quantities.

"NZers can see & feel inequality rising whilst more wealth is siphoned to the very wealthy. As an election draws near, politicians of all stripes must take a good look at how we can reorient our economy so that wealth doesn't accumulate at the top whilst everyone else falls further behind." #nzpol

Fancy moon.

🚨"The Com" is a network targeting youth through games like Roblox & Minecraft. This link below provides a sectioned NZ resource: 1: A Careful Introduction | Advisories 2: Academic Resources | Links Content Warning ⚠️ Child exploitation themes 1/4 🧵 www.unmaskingextremism.com/media-hub/th...

Such blood, much moon (slightly blurry).

Why are you crying? It’s just a kid’s movie? The movie:

Way to show girls and women - yet again - that their trauma means nothing and they may as well not bother trying to get justice. Gloriavale leader Howard Temple’s prison sentence quashed - replaced with home detention www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/gloriaval...

🤔 ....Dishwasher, maybe?

Someone should bust Narges Mohammadi out of prison and put her in charge.

Iran now confirming the Ayatollah is dead. Live: Iran’s Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei's daughter, grandchild also killed in strikes, Iranian media reports www.rnz.co.nz/news/world/5...

Alarms going off at the Al Jazeera newsdesk while covering the attack on Iran. Brief flash of fear in the anchor's eyes but he's carrying on with his interview.

Trump and Neyanyahu planned this "for months" and the "date was set weeks ago" according to Israel. Which means the talks were bullshit all along and Trump's started hopes for a diplomatic solution were a blatant lie. We need to take a big step backwards from this ''friendship'.

Trump has posted a video on Truth social saying it's a major and ongoing combat operation and calling for regime change. It's not a warning shot, he's started a war.

Looks like Israel got tired of waiting for Trump to start a war with Iran for them and got the bombing party started themselves.

ACC should do an ad series on packaging. I swear 99% of my household injuries are from trying to get the Listerine plastic off or prying the pouring attachments off bottles to prep them for recycling.

Anthropic: No, sorry, you can't use our tech to spy on everyone or kill people. Trump regime: *Childishly throws all their Anthropic toys out of the cot*

Me: Alexa, add cottage cheese to my shopping list. Facebook: Hi, I have made all your suggested reels AI slop recipes for cottage cheese. Enjoy!

How are people seriously cheering and clapping all this white supremacist, anti-trans bullshit.

Puberty blockers ban anxiety grinds on as ‘very, very worried’ children and families look for support thespinoff.co.nz/society/25-0...

Please can you guys share this piece or if not the piece, the information in it, on social media. #nzpol NZCPR Author on Tamatha Paul Cycleways vs Water Piece Doesn't Exist. Minutes from the meeting and those there, on the left & right of council, have confirmed the vote never happened as described

National/Act/WinstonFirst would prefer their voters not have to see the reality of the society they've created.

15 years today. I still consider my shoe choices each morning to judge whether I could walk home through rubble in them if something happens.

The GenX urge to discern whether you're only dreaming or if this burning is an eternal flame.