i had a dream that a man came to deliver drugs to me then begged for my forgiveness for being late

i am flying weightless, feel the breeze in my hollow bones, and as i close my eyes, a violin plays softly from below. i hear it so clearly, the reverb through my veins as it cuts me into dust, i am but pieces of everything that kept me whole for so long

i think i need to go to therapy again

waiting until next march to try to have a cinnamoroll party for my birthday 🥲

i feel like i’m not allowed to want to celebrate for my birthday and my birthday was in the first week of this month and i did nothing hung out with no one because i felt like i couldnt.

how do unlearn the idea that i need to earn love and care and respect and niceness from those who say they love me

this is what i mean when i say i use music as a journal. i just write my feelings and let them out 😭

i’m not religious, but i was raised christian, and one random day i thought “jesus died and i killed him”

my bf said this old photo on my vsco has the vibes of this scene from the shining

i added the songs i put on spotify to my playlist to see how they sound like coming after/before actual music and sometimes i dont even realize its my song thats playing

been fucking around in photoshop making lil covers for all my song blog posts

the rage I feel when there are people at work people at the gym people at the store people in the kitchen people in my house people in my room

my vsco is lowkey so good there’s so many good photos on there that i love ugh it’s like my photo archive

i still post photos on vsco

i still haven’t gotten a cake pop and i still want one so bad 😭

my music lately has been so depressing lately cause im basically using it like a journal

i want a cake pop so bad rn

i will never not slouch on a comfy couch

love using my freshman high school ID to crush it up

does anyone else feel like they don’t get skinnier or smaller as they lose weight and it feels more like this happens to you???

it’s actually super homophobic to not venmo me 500$ rn because like what do you not support the queer community??

i think i need to see my therapist again

can’t wait to stay up all night and make shit

my thoughts are always racing and i’m so impatient

didn’t talk to my family for a month, i finally answer, they make sure i’m not dead, tell me i can’t do that again, and ask me about building furniture

I don’t like the person I’m becoming

i hate leaving the house lately like i don’t wanna see ANYONE or even go outside its too overwhelming and stressful and depressing right now

im so good at reading emotions and feeling like my friend was telling me about stuff she went thru and i was like “and u felt like this” “and then you did this and it made you feel like this” and every single thing i got on. point. i felt psychic

i need more 21+ moots on edsky and someone who loves playing diablo 4 and would play with me 😭

im gonna take this as a no and “plz stop mentioning ur cringey fucking blog” cause i never get interaction when i post about my music 😔😭

i made my blog look so cuteeeee and you can listen to all my songs on their posts and i put all the lyrics :) and you can leave comments and i can respond!!

and i dropped like 500$ on vinyls because i can’t control myself

i’m back i deleted tik tok so i can build my confidence back

i’m going off social media for now i feel so cringe and stupid and like a huge joke and like everyone sees me and everything i do and say that way i can’t take it

do my eyes make people uncomfortable are they too big are they cartoonish are they off putting????

someone said i have Daniel Larson’s eyes in my tik tok comments

i have such a huge fear that i’ll be posting my art or music that i think is good and it’ll actually be so cringe to everyone else so i’ll become a lolcow because of it

i’m not tweeting or posting about my music anymore cause no one is like legit interested and i get discouraged :(

i made a blog for all the music i’m never gonna put on spotify and their lyrics

i legit cant stop making music and it helps me avoid food because today i weighed in at 94lbs

pre-save my demos here and see clips in the thread of some songs :) url2734.distrokid.com/ls/click?upn...

releasing an ep of all my song demos yayyy

my friend hasn’t texted me since january and i texted her twice before i was like forget it. well she responds today with the same excuse as always which is just BS she makes up and she threw in “happy birthday btw” like wtf

i feel skinny on my birthday (so far) yayyyy

3 song demos done! do u guys wanna hear themmm 👀

guyssss i made a SONG TODAY!!!

playing diablo in my chill lil area 🥰

the power was out the other day for my whole complex so i invited my neighbor up to my apartment and we made collages :) this is mine

hi guyssss sorry i’ve been MIA my boyfriend bought diablo 4 and i am addicted. someone plz join my clan 🥺

cured part of my inner child