"My loyalty?! For twenty four years people have been trying to kill me! People who know how. Now do you think that's because my dad was a Greek soda pop maker? Or do you think that's because I'm an American spy? Go fuck yourself, you fucking child!"

Ford Probe. It's got it all: Japan-Detroit collab, jelly bean styling, only made in the 1990s, designed after the oil crisis as a replacement for a legacy product, sport compact coupe, 15 exterior colors, 6 upholstery choices, automatic seatbelts, incompatible with post 2000 collision regulations.

#MadMen depicts #DonDraper as being too young for WW2, but old enough for Korea, and 30-35 in 1960. In canon, he was born in 1926, but this is only possible if he was born in 1928-30. It's an irreconcilable continuity error. Stop discoursing about it and get on with your life.

Up with People

Whiplash, but with figure skating. It pains me to say it, but Kevin Spacey would be perfect for the role.

New England Supermarket Chains, listed in descending order of in-store vibes, from best to worst. Market Basket Roche Bros. Donelan's Big Y Shaw's / Star Stop & Shop Hannaford's

Reminder: the WNBA pays its players approximately 10% of league revenue; the NBA pays its players about 50%. There may be cost structures that prevent them from matching that, but if you think they're not trying to take advantage of the players on the women's side, you're nuts.

Sometime around 8:30 PM ET tomorrow, every dickslap on the internet is going to suddenly become an expert on the Jones-Shafroth Act of 1917.

Son the Younger is watching Modern Family, which I watched with Son the Elder when it first aired. I'm now convinced that it's not only the best of the Obama era Comedy Vérité sitcoms (better than The Office and Parks & Rec), it's actually one of the best TV shows ever made.

(What's the Story) Morning Glory is approximately equidistant between Rubber Soul and the present day. As you were.

A POV video of someone driving a 5th Gen Pelude (just like mine, same color and everything!) for the first time. Note how happy it makes him.

Most Internet sleuths would be incompetent real life detectives. They assume that every single piece of information is incriminating or exculpatory evidence, as opposed to background noise in a world where people actually behave inconsistently and illogically all the time.

Hold my beer.

Death Camp for Cutie.

I wonder what Arsenio Hall is doing these days

The perfect tweet doesn't exi...

The Patriots' offense requires the QB & WR to read the defense in real time after the play starts, come to the same conclusions, and then (telepathically?) adjust the route tree accordingly. This deserves repsect, however much you hate Brady or Boston.

EVERYTHING BUT THE GIRL: WALKING WOUNDED. Builds on the nearly-perfect Amplified Heart, pivoting from acoustic to electronic without missing (ahem) a beat. The band considers this heap of heartbreak—equally tender, tough, and tuneful—their masterpiece. It's hard to disagree. #MWE

I have come to the realization that one of the defining rhetorical behaviors of our age is that everyone is "You People" -ing everyone else in increasingly niche and lousy ways. Great job, team. Just fantastic.

It's 1996. I'm wearing a JAMC Stoned & Dethroned t-shirt over ripped jeans with black Converse All-Stars. I listen to Disintegration in the dark. I hate everything but most of all I hate myself.

SWING OUT SISTER: FILTH & DREAMS. Its legend enhanced by being Japan-only and out of print, this former A Certain Ratio side project adds Portishead-influencd trip-hop flourish to their flawelssly classy blue-eyed sophistipop soul. A cool record, but not worth $65 on eBay. #MWE

Excessive takeout consumption and bad money management in your 20s are nothing new. But people get sick of Zoomer insistence that Society™ has made them avoidant, profligate, hare-brained, self-pitying, helpless, unaccountable, and immune to self-improvement. #DoorDash

BRANIAC: BONSAI SUPERSTAR. Experimental noise collages and 90s weirdo swagger at the nexus of Sonic Youth, Jon Spencer, GVSB, and...Beck? This cautionary tale about having a mechanic look at a used car is worth hearing if you stayed up on school nights to watch 120 Minutes. #MWE

Five of my desert island discs I wish I could hear again for the first time that deserve your #MWE attention: PAUL SIMON: THE RHYTHM OF THE SAINTS THE CURE: WISH THE JESUS & MARY CHAIN: STONED & DETHRONED ELECTRONIC: ELECTRONIC MATTHEW SWEET: 100% FUN

Best take yet.

Set up the record player for the first time since I last moved in 2010. After replacing the drive belt and the platter mat, it picked up without missing a beat. And now I'm playing the best record in your parents' record collection that you forgot to steal when you moved out.

Someone posted this incredible image without attribution. See ALT text for details.

this mural attributing to the grateful dead a calypso song first recorded in 1936 and popularized by harry belafonte says everything you need to know about the part of the world i'm from

As soon as Verizon FiOS phone support exceeds their call center's call resolution time target, they give up on trying to solve the problem and try to open a technician visit ticket to get you off the phone. Doesn't matter if they've thoroughly troubleshot the issue.

Now do Seinfeld

[The biker jacket from Akira with the capsule on the back, except it's an Adderall XR]

When you lose at Wordle two days in a row.

Imagine your boss saying the word "pussy." As you were.

1. Cook at pizza/sub shop 2. Laboratory assistant 3. Receptionist 4. Technical Writer 5. Sustainability Director

sickos_yes.jpg

The #Browns should hire Jerod Mayo. Patriots went 3-6 in one-score games in '24, with the worst combination of offensive skill position players and coordinator in the NFL. Mayo was once an up-and-coming candidate, put in position to fail. Also: NOBODY WANTS THE JOB.

Give me one good reason why they should not play the Super Bowl in throwback unforms.

Just east of Worcester, Massachusetts.

If this week proves a turning point, Historians will note that the public didn't turn on ICE until they started going after white people.

Based on how loudly, confidently, and dangerously wrong I see people being on the internet about things I understand based on education and work experience, I can only imagine what's being said about things I don't.

Reminder that the Radio Dept.'s "Pet Grief" is a perfect winter album.

I want to live in this world again. At least until I get annoyed at the lack of all the things I've come to depend on the internet to help me with.

Today's Agenda: 1. Make and eat French Toast. 2. Re-Read James and the Giant Peach to help son-the-younger fine tune his in-progress book report due Wed. 3. Watch the Patriots game. 4. Work on the model train layout. 5. Make soup. 5. Talk on the phone with a friend in LA.

This is a real deep cut.

[A scorching and frankly offensive Alex Honnold take that I won't dare post on main]

“Get it all on record now — get the films — get the witnesses — because somewhere down the road of history some bastard will get up and say that this never happened.” Dwight D. Eisenhower, after visiting liberated concentration camps in April 1945

The New Coach is Probably Gonna Work Out: Giants, Titans, Falcons, Ravens The New Coach is Probably Not Gonna Work Out: Steelers, Dolphins, Bills*, Browns* TBD Raiders, Cardinals * Yes, I know the Bills and the Browns haven't hired a coach yet.