🐋

The real treasure is the friends we made along the way. 🐋

Happy chowder day, to everyone reading along. 🐋

Ishmael looks like he’s trying to sell Queequeg life insurance. 🐋

Interesting to read this bit while I’m also reading “On Repentance and Repair” by @theradr.bsky.social. 🐋

Trying hard to take him seriously, but “Mapple” sounds like the name of a cheap breakfast syrup trying to trick customers into thinking it has actual maple in it. 🐋

What Ishmael imagines when the landlord says that Queequeg is trying to sell his head. 🐋

I was thinking of The Spouter-Inn when I wrote this joke last winter. 🐋

Imagine you’re an old whaleman, just returned from years at sea. All you and your mates want is to have a drink and sleep in a real bed, and instead you encounter Ishmael who makes you all talk about the painting on the wall for an hour. 🐋

In a related story, the new mayor of San Dimas promises to govern bodaciously.

“Were Niagara but a cataract of sand, would you travel your thousand miles to see it?” A giant river of sand constantly falling over a 200-foot cliff? I would definitely go see that. 🐋

“Sailing without Ahab” starts off in a very @hwaet.info -approved manner. 🐋

It’s generally assumed that “Moby-Dick” has a canonical start date in December 1841, so there’s a good chance that Ishmael has entered the AME Zion church (then on South Second St, three blocks from the water) and the preacher he sees is Frederick Douglass. 🐋

One of the best things about Ishmael insisting on sailing from Nantucket is that Melville himself never visited Nantucket until a year after Moby-Dick was published. 🐋

So, do we start reading now, or wait until morning? 🐋

You can force yourself to use alt text by going to “Settings -> Accessibility” 🐋

I’m ready for A Month of Dick 2026! Going to try to pair the poems in @stevementz.bsky.social book with the chapters each day. 🐋

It's almost time! 🐋📖

The movie ends with Jay and Tory kissing in front of the fully lit menorah. Jay is taking a new doctor job in Chicago. Tory plans to find work as some kind of do-gooder lawyer. Nobody has to give up the career they love or settle in some weird small town. #halmarkHanukkah

Night 8. They’re down two candles but then Sam reveals he had a secret box of them the whole time. He explains that he and his late wife had been saving them for a special occasion. They’re Hanukkah candles! When else would one use them? #halmarkHanukkah

Jay and Tory almost kiss but Sam interrupts them. Then they almost kiss again and he interrupts them again. I’m taking this as a meta joke about how Hallmark movies usually only allow for one kiss at the end. #halmarkHanukkah

Jay gets mad that Tory didn’t tell him his grandfather owns the building, so Sam locks Jay and Tory in his living room with some babka until they can get along again. Babka - the cure for everything. #halmarkHanukkah

Sam confesses to Tory that he owns the bar – and the entire building – but only the bar manager knows. I wonder if his family will be upset to find out he’s hiding the fact that he‘s a multimillionaire from them. #halmarkHanukkah

Bubbe notices that the bar has the Cohen candles - minus the two that Tory gave her - and wonders how they’ll have enough for the eighth night. Sam has faith that if the original oil could last eight days, his candles can last eight nights. #halmarkHanukkah

Sam creates the night 7 drink, but can’t come up with a name. The waitress/aspiring comedian suggests “The He-Brew” (“because of the coffee”). Guess they don’t know about the beer. #hallmarkHannukah

Bubbe shows up at the bar with “a game where you throw beanbags at a board”. I guess someone decided that “corn hole” sounds too dirty for this channel. #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory is preparing more Maccabee Mules. I thought there was a special drink for each night, but maybe she’s adding a new drink each night so by the last night she’ll be making eight weird drinks that nobody wants. #hallmarkHanukkah

Night 6 drink is a Hanukkah Hammer - ingredients not specified. Tory mentions she found a Hanukkah playlist online and one of the patrons asks if it’s just the dreidel song on repeat. Which is not fair. There are at least 2 or 3 other Hanukkah songs out there. #hallmarkHanukkah

Bubbe has figured out that Tory lost her job. And also knew that Tory hated her job because “happy people don’t order bagels with strawberry cream cheese”. At least she wasn’t ordering a blueberry bagel (I hope)! #hallmarkHanukkah

Night 5 features a drink called a Yenta that involves chocolate syrup on the glass and also “Menorah matchmaking”. One question is about how often people to to temple, even though most of the crowd doesn’t look Jewish. #hallmarkHanukkah

Night 4. Tory has prepared a drink with gold flakes in it that Jay names “The Gelt-y Pleasure”. They also want to come up with some Hanukkah games that aren’t dreidel but the best they can come up with is basically “I never” but with donuts instead of drinks. #hallmarkHanukkah

Night 3. Lottie, the chef/manager has prepared some Hanukkah-themed food that is way too fancy for this place. We don’t get to see what the special drink is. Maybe there isn’t one. #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory’s sister is worried that she isn’t looking hard enough for a new legal job. She was laid off less than a week ago! Let her enjoy being a bartender for a bit. Maybe even take a vacation! #hallmarkHanukkah

The first night’s drink was called a “Maccabee Mule”. Night 2 is a “bourbon shamash” which is just a bourbon smash (a drink I’m not familiar with) with a “jelly donut hole garnish”, which is a disgusting idea. #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory: “It drives me crazy that people assume just because a guy and a girl are single, the same age, and Jewish, they should be a thing.” Just wait a few years, and your family won’t even care if the guy is the same age! Or even Jewish! #hallmarkHanukkah

Jay and Tory go for a walk and he marvels at Chicago’s dense, walkable, mixed-use urbanism that is illegal to build in most American cities. #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory and Jay discover they both went to Camp Shalom when they were kids. That name seems a little cliched, but apparently there are several real Camps Shalom out there. #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory suggests doing a special drink for every night and Sam guilts her into bartending for all of it. I really hope the other drinks don’t involve Manishewitz. #hallmarkHanukkah

Jay makes a joke about a Manishewitz sangria, which inspires Tory to make a Moscow Mule with Manishewitz added. Because every dive bar has Manishewitz and copper Moscow mule mugs on hand. #hallmarkHanukkah

Everyone keeps referring to Rocky’s as a dive bar, but it’s way too clean and well lit, and also they have good food. I get the feeling no one at Hallmark has ever been to an actual dive bar. #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory doesn’t want to come back for a second night but Sam dares her to do it. And then double dares her. And since she doesn’t know about the physical challenge option she agrees to come back. #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory follows Jay to the dive bar where Sam criticizes Jay for taking the candles. Then the bartender abruptly leaves for a surprise vacation and the chef/manager forces Tory to take her place. Good thing she has those savings, since they don’t discuss salary at all! #hallmarkHanukkah

Jay and Torey meet cute at a giant party supply store that in real life would not sell Hanukkah candles, but in this world has one box left. They alternate pretending to insist the other person take it until Jay actually does. #hallmarkHanukkah

Quick cut between Bubbe (why doesn’t she get a name?) telling Tory to buy the “good“ Hanukkah candles (a made-up brand called Cohen) and Sam telling Jay the same thing. Both kids are skeptical that candle brands matter, but they agree to humor the old folks. #hallmarkHanukkah

Jay is at Sam’s apartment trying to sell him on Florida. Sam retorts that he doesn’t like golf or sunshine. He also has a really nice apartment. You can’t ask someone who found a great apartment in a big city to just give it up! #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory: “Don’t tell anyone in the family I lost my job.” Sister: “Okay, but me not telling anyone is your Hanukkah present” Nephew: “What’s my Hanukkah present” Sister: “Socks” (We did books instead of socks this year, but now I’m noticing that I really need new socks.) #hallmarkHanukkah

Tory goes to visit her sister and exposits that she has enough savings and severance to not need a new job for a few months. I feel like she should have several years of savings since it’s clear she never had any time to spend any money. #hallmarkHanukkah

Sam (Marc Summers)’s grandson Jay shows up from Florida to try to convince him to move down there with the rest of the family. He wisely prefers to stay in Chicago and everyone in the bar threatens to kill Jay if he pursues this, which is the appropriate punishment. #hallmarkHanukkah

Cut to “Rocky’s Bar” where Marc Summers (host of Double Dare) is stealing maraschino cherries and a younger patron is trying to awkwardly flirt with the chef. Presumably it’s now the afternoon, but this bar give off a bit of a “people start drinking here at 9:00 am” vibe. #hallmarkHanukkah

Bad news! Her firm (shown only by an acronym, but surely a bunch of super Jewish names) is merging with Wackowitz, Schwartz, Greenberg & Goldblatt and she’s been laid off. I swear I did not make up any of those names. #hallmarkHanukkah