I remember when Prince died and I expressed some sadness on the internet, and people were like, “you’re weird, get over it,” and it didn’t occur to me that I should retaliate by getting them fired.

Yesterday, when JD Vance came to Minneapolis, I got to yell “Shame on you!” at him in person (through layers of bulletproof glass). He might not have noticed, but I’m still riding this high. 10/10 cathartic experience. Would recommend.

Perimenopause: If I hear a cough, if there are too many people at Costco, if a wisp of my own hair tickles my face, it’s all I can do to not to scream and hit something. If people only knew there’s just a thin veil of self-control (and physical exhaustion) protecting them from my imagined violence.

Last night I had a nightmare my family was back living in a townhouse with an HOA and neighbors sharing a wall. Why is my brain being so mean?

If anyone noticed a women struggling to mow her overgrown boulevard with a little reel mower before the rain this morning, that was me, and yes, I’m still alive, but barely. 😥

You honk at me the second the light turns green? Now I am Granny on her Sunday drive. My car is a rusty jalopy that needs to be coaxed forward. My foot caresses the gas like I’m petting a scared kitten. Why, this road must be made of molasses! I am pettiness personified. You’ll be sorry, Buster.

The song lyric that I most resonate with is from Cake: “she’s touring the facilities and picking up slack.” That’s a mom. You can’t tell me this isn’t about a mom schlepping from room to room, cleaning up after her husband and kids.

This summer, the cool kids are into knee-length jorts, cowboy caviar, Weezer, Arizona Arnold Palmer Lite, and boycotting Target. I’ll update if I gather more intel.

Is there a reason there aren’t pedal pubs for underagers? They could serve soft drinks and the kids could obnoxiously belt out showtunes—at the optimal age for singing and being silly in public. It’s not as cute when drunk 50 year-olds are screaming Sweet Caroline down 1st Avenue.

The TikTok-famous La Scala salad (a.k.a. The Kardashian salad), homemade, with only Aldi ingredients. Tasty, and also a commentary on how we got here and how it’s going.

One thing about adulthood that has been a letdown is the fact that sinks are not self-cleaning. Every time I’ve wiped down a sink in the past 30+ years I’ve been astonished (offended, even) at how something that has constant soap and hot water running through it can get so grimy.

Hunt & Gather (or any vintage store) is a danger zone for both time and money. For instance, do I collage? No. Have I thought seriously about collaging? No. In the last two hours, did I assemble a $60 pile of postcards, magazine pages, and interesting scrap papers to begin my collaging hobby? 🫠

In my yard: green and purple things are popping up, it smells earthy and damp, beetles and worms are under everything I move, a robin is sitting on her eggs right outside my window, and I pruned a little tree for the first time today. Snip, snip, snip. I felt like Edward Scissorhands

Friends, I’m going to need reviews of Blackberry Dr. Pepper before I go buy some. I’ve only seen it in a multi-can pack, and that’s too much.

Thrift store find. I can’t figure out if it’s real.

Waiting for a woman I don’t know to meet me at this Bloomington Lunds/Byerlys with a pair of shoes I am buying off Marketplace. I think I got ghosted.

🎫 🎫 🎫 I've been to 38/53 of Minnesota's essential music venues. How many have you been to? Tally it up and read the Strib's ratings for each here. 🎫 🎫 🎫 www.startribune.com/venues

Wholesome teen story: my 14 year-old was playing online games with her friends this morning and they got bored, so they all decided to clean their respective rooms “together” while still in the group chat. It took 2 hours, and they all had a fun time. Sweet little weirdos. 🥹

I think the craziest thing about this Signal scandal is that by next week there’s gonna be something 10 times worse

I see your shoe/sock game and I approve, Michael Shannon.

A moment of wholesomeness from my morning: My daughter connected to the car Bluetooth and started playing Tom’s Diner. I reacted enthusiastically 👏👏👏. She rolled her eyes and said, “Mom, your face right now...” But then we both sang it like we meant it. ☺️

I desperately want to believe this “focus and energy” gummy I just ate is going to get me to clean my entire house today.

Nothing will ever be as funny to me as these Downton Abbey valentines from 10 years ago.

I still can't tell if it's supposed to be pronounced DOHZG or DOGGY, and I'm fine not knowing.

If anyone watched this Superbowl commercial shot at Public Domain in Minneapolis and was more impressed by the beautiful interior than the celebrities or the clothing line, I can tell you that Jeremy Nelson of Little Box was the architect. (I know him pretty well.) 😉 youtu.be/nhz0sXYmPa0

3 days ago I bought myself a Bose bluetooth speaker as a little treat. This evening our cat parkoured off the kitchen table, hitting a lit candle and sloshed what looks like a gallon of wax over the table, my favorite vase + a dozen tulips, my planner, and yes, the front of my bluetooth speaker.

I’m not a great plant mom. I’ve learned a few things over the years and I’m definitely doing a lot better than I used to, but I honestly can’t tell if brown edges on leaves are from under- or over-watering.

Stranded at the MOA while I wait for AAA.This is the 3rd time in my life I’ve called AAA from the mall. Quintessential Minnesota experience?

I had a PT consult today for some neck-shoulder-elbow pain and I really liked one of the words my clinician used: Ridiculo- something. I was thinking, yes, it is so ridiculous that I'm dealing with this right now. Turns out, she probably said Radiculopathy. But I still like my way better.

You can go see the cutey from Stranger Things, but you can’t bring anyone with you?

When I have to write a permission note for one of my kids I try to write it in cursive as if someone's going to need convincing it came from a legitimate adult.

Here’s a timelapse video of my drawing of Lili Trifilio, frontwoman of Beach Bunny. My kid and I both love this band so much. It’s not typical for me to do two drawings back-to-back, but focusing on an art project grounds me and provides a mental boost during (gestures at dumpster 🔥).

Here’s a timelapse video of my drawing of Sophia Eris’ boots and plaid pants on stage at First Avenue Saturday night. Looks like I can’t post the video and the finished picture together on Bluesky like I can on Instagram so I’ll put that in a separate post.

I am so tickled with this package that arrived today from a radio show in Vancouver I haven’t even listened to yet. I really just wanted this cool pin when I found it on Etsy, but thought I’d make the shipping worth it and get all the fun stuff. @accordionnoir.bsky.social 🪗🔥

Thinking about constructing a giant advent calendar. A piece of chocolate hiding behind a little door would be a reason to get out bed the next 1,460 days.

If one can do a Nazi salute so effortlessly in front of an audience, it's probably because one has been dancing around at home practicing it in front of a mirror.

My TikTok content was just timelapse videos of my shoe drawings. I have all my videos saved. This was my 1st post, in October 2021. It’s Arlo Parks at the 7th St Entry.

Does anyone else have a multi-moisturizer routine before going out in the freeze? I usually have 3 serums/lotions/creams layered on my face at any given time, going in order of thinnest/most absorbent to thickest/most occlusive.

My kids are gonna be so relieved they don’t have to do red dye #3 drills at school anymore.

Here’s a shoe drawing I worked on today. While it’s true to the picture I was drawing from, I’m afraid the legs don’t make sense in this position. I have better pictures but I really wanted to show the bottom of one of the shoes. 🤷‍♀️

This guy came to check out my feeder today, and then left without trying any Songbird Blend.

My dog woke me up at 4:30 and I dozed with him on the couch having the wildest dream about destroying a drone that was filled with doll heads and feet. Then when its owner, Shelley Duvall, showed up looking for it, I had a really productive conversation with her about how her drone had scared me.

The bad news is that we had to tear out some wet, moldy basement carpet and throw out a bunch of concert posters I had stacked in the corner. The good news is that we get to hire a chimney sweep for the first time and my family is so ready with our Mary Poppins songs.

The thing that surprises me most about adulthood is that you can never get ahead and just have one or two days where everything seems OK and you can coast for a little while. There is always another kid/house/pet/parent/vehicle crisis right around the corner.

Say you have made 10x the amount of spinach artichoke dip that your family of four can reasonably consume in the next week. What would you do with the leftovers?

Last night I begrudgingly took the 14 year-old to a Sing-A-Long showing of Wicked in Eden Prairie. I was worried we’d be the only dorks singing. No—people showed up ready to belt! Wrong notes, missed entrances, making a mess out of the runs, with grace and good humor. It was kind of heartwarming.

Avoid going into a Trader Joe’s today. It’s too late for me. Save yoursellllvvvessss.

Not to be braggy, but I finished off and threw away four old gift cards this morning. Does anyone else feel like gift cards are more of a burden than a gift?

The audacity of the woman who thought it was cool to come back from the bathroom and push her way through the front of the audience during THE guitar solo of the night. Just…why? 🙄