when you interview the guy so hard he ODs right after

New to Discord server. Books channel is talking about Le Guin and Left Hand. I post link to her story "Coming of Age in Karhide" bc it takes place in same society. It occurs to me afterward that this contains a teenager having sex w an adult ("But They're Aliens, It's Normal" etc) Maybe a bad debut.

Saw a blue drink mix labeled "SONIC" and got excited because I hoped for Sonic the Hedgehog branded but it turned out to be Sonic the Restaurant branded. No thank you.

the house across the street has been having a party for 5+ hours now, yelling and laughing at great volume all the while, and I can't make out more than an occasional word clearly but based on what I can hear someone has definitely put their balls on someone else's face

saw a designer dog breeder on IG currently producing cane corsodoodles (the photos of them were definitely AI but I also don't doubt someone is stupid enough to actually breed and buy said poor monstrosities)

guys we gotta vote against this

at what age did you realize that your parents could not discern a good video game from a bad video game

superstition like "if the broom falls over it means company's coming" but when my testosterone falls on the floor it means FedEx is trying unsuccessfully to locate the back door again

Watched Casino for the first time and thought it stank. Which is crazy because Goodfellas is one of my favorites. It feels like if AI did a Goodfellas, like "I can imitate the contents and patterns of this film but cannot understand what made any of it compelling." Even though the same guys made it.

Maintenance Van Not Park In Handicapped Spot Challenge 2026 And Counting

I dreamed up a hot business idea: funeral horses, you pay for a horse to be at your funeral (and a handler who hangs out and makes sure the horse does not get scared or desecrate the corpse or anything.) It adds solemnity and elegance.

got in trouble for telling a bunch of baby nerds trying to "figure out" what was "really happening" in an indie horror game that they were overthinking and could experience art without attempting to puzzle and "solve the mystery" of it like fucking Scooby Doo. I was Behaving Poorly but also Correct.

Eevee evolution named Teeveeon. you get it from making Eevee watch your shows

My opthalmologist told me a corny joke - What do you call an exploding T rex? Dinomite! - so I chuckled and told him mine - What is gray and will kill you if it falls out of a tree onto your head? A parking lot - and he didn't get it and that's why I'm not getting a new glasses prescription.

transplanting my favorite easter post over from tumblr

bells unring themselves all the time actually; it's called shutting up. fuck off.

actual thoughts I find myself having "if I was unhoused, maybe other unhoused people would be friends with me." some of you, furiously helpful, are already typing "you can be friends with unhoused people right now, you know." yeah but I'd have to go outside

other good Zoo Tycoon 2 names

I am memoizing the pwedge of awwegiance

Don't call it a fucking sitz bath, man. Whatever is going on that I need one, my dignity is already circling the drain because I am having some sort of terrible ass or pussy area problem. Don't make me think "if it fitz I sitz" while lowering my miserable shitty body into a warm puddle.

anyone else have to explain Clavicular to one of their parents in the past 24 hours?

this is some horsey horseless behavior bro smdh

old men got nothing better to do than get stopped along the way and look at you as if to say some shit

SEVERAL of my mother's part-time co-workers at the hospital, by their own admission, are financially well-off and only doing this job to get away from their spouses or families for a while. It annoys her because she wants their hours/shifts but also, like, is anyone okay at all

thank you stupid horrifying world for the content it nourishes me so

Zoo Tycoon 2 guest with a cool jazz guy name

Everyone is either too smart or too stupid for me to be friends with. I'm the Cloud Atlas of friends.

I've been on Tumblr long enough that I'm not moved by just any old shitposter doing a bit but discovering harrisonhead and donaldfagencuntwars really made my morning.

I clap Old Deuteronomy on the back and jovially address him as "Old D." He hates this. I am not getting into the Heavyside Layer.

I think it would be a funny bit if I got a hat made that had bones inside in shape of the hat so that if I got an x ray (they let me keep the hat on for calmness) they'd see the little hat skeleton on top of my skull. they'd laugh

Love it when whatever UI I'm interacting with refers to viewing a page as "visiting" it. Yes please let's visit the dwarf porn.

Space Funeral is a nice game

found a years-old document apparently about post I wanted to make (some of which I did make) that contains the following puzzling entries: Empty kibble-less praise Go home and graph Gendered spitting "Liked" boner Airplanes boat Gingerbread cussing

did anyone else have an insatiable appetite as a kid for those little crappy plastic animals that came in a bag or tube of like 30 of them? farm set, zoo set, dinosaur set etc. does anyone else remember that one tyrannosaur type dino with the old man ear and the fucked up foot who was always there?

Head is all puffed up because there's pollen floating around. STOP USING THE AIR FOR SEX. And the water, while we're at it. TAKE YOUR SPUNK AND PUT IT RIGHT INSIDE THERE or die heirless.

apparently this is the last of a historic diner chain but to casuals like myself it just looks like the worst possible restaurant name

words that mean something bad but sound like they mean something worse

doing the Ray Smuckles motorcyle thing in MSPaint but I'm just dragging a transparent swan photo toward a transparent antelope photo and making a kiss noise

Post a gif of who you wanted to be as a kid.

it's me I'm pornography

watched the Oscars in a chat of young adults, I can see them in real time complain when those onstage don't acknowledge current events "you're a fucking shill and genocide enabler" etc. and when one DOES they pivot to "Oh you think this is NEW? US has ALWAYS done this shit and NOW you're concerned?"

hurt my ankle and WebMD suggests rest and icing but I only have frosting

just straight up blocking people who say something I find stupid and annoying. I'm free, I'm free. Did I lock myself out of some future interaction that would have been meaningful/revelatory to me? maybe? fuck you

in the center of the muffin is the virginal orb of muffin flesh, the Maiden. the Mother is the top. the side and bottom "cup" that has touched the pan is the Crone.

man that's kind of a really bad choice of business slogan

The list of horse names for Horsey Game is in data/names.txt. In case one wanted to edit it. Life CAN be easy.

Christians teaching kids Bible stuff really harp on the Noah's Ark story, not because it contains any lessons that are especially useful or relevant to a small child's spiritual development but because giraffe funny

don't make me have to remember that Goose and Geese are different bands, world

Hell guy checking his clipboard: Hold on. Looks like at age 8 you swore your soul to horses. Me: What? I don't remember that. Hell guy: Well, it counts. Horse: Oh great, another one. Let me guess - used to be a horse-girl? Me: Yeah but I'm not really a girl anymore - Horse: We get that a lot.