Imagine paying for a full season of Sunday ticket to watch THAT. Red Zone is the way.

I feel like I want Indian food but it could just be that the day ends in “y”.

That said, send light skin home.

Can’t be mad at the outcome when you sharted on your opportunity to control it.

Agree but also Miami could have avoided this if they hadn’t lost to SMU.

I’m still bugging that the closest I’ve gotten to a Russian manicure was a #regla hard gel with someone who randomly finds removing dead skin satisfying. He doesn’t know it yet but he’s stuck with me. 🙃

FedEx, UPS, and USPS.

Didn’t stop me from showing up obviously but I realized the first day my ass was old. And that was 15 years ago. 🫠🫠🫠

CrossFit

The number of people I will never see or speak to again just because I moved. A blessing.

Ummm I know. The logo looks like the yahoo logo used to. 🙃

Does the “Y” in BYU stand for yahoo? This ain’t some kind of copyright infringement?

One day I’m going to closely examine why I have so many shirts from boxes that don’t exist anymore.

Good morning people in my phone. Yes I woke up thinking about food.

Sometimes I think about that young man who dipped his samosa into his butter chicken on the clock app. Up until I saw that, it had never occurred to me to try it. Life. Affirming. I hope he’s having a good day.

Now that I’m thinking about it. Pho King really just never reopened. I remember when they had the fire. My dumb ass walked up to see if they would be opening anyway. That broth and them iced coffees had me in a chokehold.

Watching this Tulane game. Me: damn it’s raining like shit there. Also me: WAYMENT

Currently rubbing my feet together with the leftovers. Bless.

Man that pho was so good today it was like I was at Pho King. Had that lemongrass chicken broth on the menu like it was 2016. If I had been thinking I would have gotten a coffee. Dah well. Bless up @thegatesofmel.blacksky.app for putting me on.

It was cold enough to wear that Yankees sweater I paid too much money for today.

Devin Williams signing with the Mets is so on brand. The bitchassery will continue. I hope they don’t serve him at La Cabaña.

They have a better record bro. No need to ✌🏾respect✌🏾 you.

😂😂😂

ICE raided a James Beard award winning restaurant & because the chef/owner was prepared, left emptyhanded:

There are no more cuticles. I’m so happy rn.

Jokes are supposed to be funny. One joke that always lands is my block hand #doe.

EVERY MOMENT FEELS LIKE A SPIN MILDRED I MEAN A SPIN MUSIC SO WHAT ABOUT THEN

Spaghetti

Unfollowing the onion on every platform. Back to staring at my nails.

Sylvester such a vibe.

Prince at MSG playing “Dance, Disco Heat”

Because it’s not gonna be ✌🏾that✌🏾 in the real world. It’s gonna be some drunken creep who doesn’t understand boundaries or the word no. Now everybody going to jail.

Murder. Violence. What the actual fuck.

I love that song 😂😂😂

THIS MAAD CITY BETTER RUN MY NIGGA

I even have a fake nail on the other hand. 🫠🫠🫠

Mans ain’t lie about doing a Russian but popped out with a flame bit and laid waste to my cuticles. This was the last thing. I’m so happy right now.

So the person who didn’t say one time that they do a Russian manicure came out the gate with a flame bit and cut my cuticles all the way off? HIRED. HIRED. HIRED.

I lurk there too. Food pics 🔥🔥🔥

Moved to after work today. I gotta pray. 🫠🫠🫠

THIS IS CULTURALLY INAPPROPRIATE

Immediate follow. 😂😂😂

😂😂😂

My dad was an Alpha. I feel like this explains so much of my childhood.

I just broke a nail. My appointment is tomorrow. About to cut the other 9 off before anyone gets any ideas about tips.

A friend of mine just had a baby at 46. Her first baby.

For all intents and purposes I went to Howard. Them other pieces of paper are just decor.

I don’t tend to tell people I’m an NYU Alum. Like for what?

I hated that shit. I had to take the 4/5 to the R to get to the gym.

I don’t ever have to do that again. *breathing exercises*