I was pretty pleased with this but loads of you are pretty much living there!

We finally have a windowsill and coving!

Not Catherine 😞

Which FIEND at M&S did this. I’m gonna be fucking huge.

The quiz ends with him playing Bruce’s Play Your Cards Right for the chance to win 100 quid and every week no one wins. I cannot describe how bizarrely frustrating and addictive it is.

Won a bottle of wine at the pub quiz 🫡🍷

Pluribus. Absolutely stunning to look at and - for me - completely gripping, even though it was glacially paced at times.

It was coving day today 👀

More old house bullshit. At least I got to play with expanding foam (which is terrifying)

Look up Millennial Cringe in the dictionary and there will be this: #TheTraitors

Also, Max Richter and Sigur Ros at the end? The music choices are always impeccable. #TheTraitors

I’m so happy. The best result. They played so well. They kept their word. They deserve it #TheTraitors

Genuinely though, I think if I was the last faithful, dragged along as a meat shield and played over and over, it would be quite mentally damaging 🙃 #TheTraitors

“Maybe they’re both traitors, who knows?” Just the whole nation Jack! #TheTraitors

Absolute legends #TheTraitors

Now is one of them gonna get greedy?! #TheTraitors

I think I need a double traitor win at this point #TheTraitors

Game on bitches!! #TheTraitors

I think their first big mistake was not getting rid of Faraaz. #TheTraitors

Omg the first hurrah just happened!

Do you think Jack is a personal trainer? #TheTraitors

James: “come on brain, one last hurrah!” I think maybe the first hurrah? #TheTraitors

I cannot cope. #TheTraitors

Excellent deployment of London Grammar there. #TheTraitors

I thought of a much better caption for this and now I’m annoyed

It’s neither of our birthdays 🤷‍♂️

First time Lizzy Line rider 🙌🏻

I am not built for UK winters. I dress for the weather (endless rain) and end up sweating my tits off. Bring on the summer where my boobies can run free 💃

Stephen playing 4D chess with the shield game #TheTraitors

Rachel: “I know how to read micro expressions so I think it’s you Jade” Jade: 👁️ 👁️ 👄 #TheTraitors

I think the questions were a poison chalice tbh. Boasting you know who they are is kinda crazy. Asking to be recruited is almost the least threatening choice? #TheTraitors

You can literally see the wheels turning 💀 #TheTraitors

They’re treating literally every minute of screen time like a Round Table. It’s deranged and amazing. #TheTraitors

It’s The Rise of Skywalker except make it my formative literary experience 😔

This is a new position.

Did Leg day. Did the Ilya Rozanov/Connor Storrie version of sumo squats. Ohhhh boy 🥴

Well. #TheTraitors

"I had fun" he says while still visibly having the worst time of his life #TheTraitors

Ross just constantly putting his foot in it. #TheTraitors

Stephen is going too hard and starting to make mistakes #TheTraitors

My gym app tells you how many people are at the gym at that moment, and the power it has to completely put me off going is unbelievable.

Backstabbing Traitors in the first week!! #TheTraitors

I think us not knowing about the secret traitor is a bit of a production flaw. Part of the joy of the programme is knowing everything and watching people flail about. #TheTraitors

The Gen Z stares tho 👁️ 👁️ 👄 #TheTraitors

The amount of Enterprise Ds being built on my timeline rn is kind of insane. The gays have cleared Lego out.

Cooking some bolognese, watching some Dropout (Dungeons and Drag Queens) and staring at the sky outside ☺️

Making progress! 🏯

I love Claudia’s uber clompy walk that she does in this bit #TheTraitors

There’s fucking hundreds of them! #TheTraitors